Kirstie Alley seems like a longtime favorite target of the tabloid press as she navigates through her life.  She is a beautiful, gifted and strong woman - maybe it’s that last term "strong woman" that has the wolves nipping at her heels.  I doubt that she invites the predatory papparazzi (some, strangely enough, do) and my heart goes out to her. 

I have to either eat protein or a heaping bowl of hot multi-grain cereal in the morning (Hodgson Mill with chunks of ripe banana added - yum!) or 2 hours later I’ll be grabbing the closest snacks I can get my hands around.

GREAT post!!!  I loved how you talked about that toxic woman.  That statement screamed out to me as well: my comments were toned down, but what I felt in my heart was "What a ______!" (fill in your expletive here).  She sounds like a power hungry control freak who most likely has smothered her little baby all her life… and wonders why she’s going out with someone she doesn’t approve of… for heaven’s sake woman!  get a clue!

As for Kirstie: she’s so amazingly beautiful and funny (there was an episode of "Match Game" on the other day from the 70s where she was a contestant and she stole the show!).  It’s horrible that the tabloids have to show these pictures (almost gleefully, certainly not with any kind of sympathy).  There are people out there who look up to Kirstie, I’m sure.  She is after all funny and gorgeous.  But it’s sad she feels she has to explain herself on national tv because of the stuff in these rags.

Keep on writing: this is a great blog and remember to enjoy the process!

The future mother-in-law in the "Ask Margo" column did not even addtess whether he treats her daughter well and makes her happy.  She was judging him solely by his looks, lack of financial success and religion.  My first thought was that her daughter could be engaged to a great looking guy who also happens to be accused of being the Craigslist Killer.  I know, he’s innocent until proven guilty.  I’m just saying… 

Thank you for this, a sound and sensible discussion of the last acceptable prejudice in our culture. As I hit my 30’s, I started gaining weight until,fifteen years later, I weighed over 250 pounds, was having all sorts of physical and emotional problems and felt just dreadful. When a few years (and more pounds) were added, I was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes, and then the real misery kicked in. Finally, after losing, gaining back, losing again, gaining even more, I sat down with my doctor and asked about bariatric surgery - a gastric bypass. And that is what I did, not for reasons of beauty, but for reasons of health. I had reached a point where ANYthing that could happen to me medically would be something major, even deadly, and I was scared. The surgery was difficult - not to be undertaken lightly, believe me. The recovery was not easy, as I suffered a pulmonary embolism that darn near killed me. I have, however, lost 128 pounds. The first 100 came off easily, and then I hit a plateau and stalled, even gained back 21 pounds. So I went to a nutritionist and we began to plan a way to eat that includes whole foods, lots of good protein, complex carbohydrates, local produce and portion control. Mindful eating, better choices in the market and - yes - more time spent preparing healthful meals and snacks has helped. I will never be slim - right now, I’m a size 16, will aim for a 12 or a 14 as this year goes on, but I am feeling better than ever. My diabetes is in perfect control; blood pressure is down; cholesterol great - and best of all, I can move, exercise and feel proud of the hard work of getting healthy. (Oh, and I just love my Spanx - nice little boosts that they are!)

But I remember all the meanness, the snide comments, the sense of failure I lived with for so many years. I made jokes about myself because I wanted to defuse what others would say about me. Inside, even as I made others laugh, I felt like dying. Morbid obesity IS dangerous, and I don’t regret my decisions one bit. But now that I celebrate my health, at a size 16, I still see images in the press and in magazines and in films and on TV that seem to me to be unrealistic for most women, and the causeof a body dysmorphia epidemic that has a terrible impact on our young women. Oprah and Kirstie have both apologized for failing to maintain weight loss. Please! Here are two beautiful and talented and smart women who loathe the part of themselves that seems like a "failure" according to popular ideals of beauty. Stop this madness! Do what you need to do to feel healthy at a size 8, or a size whatever! (I refuse to admit that there is a "size" 00 - to me, that translates into invisibility.) Think before making a comment about a heavy friend or colleague. If you would never dream of making a remark about someone’s race, ethnicity, religion or culture, then for heaven’s sake, be as sensitive about that person’s weight. And as for women who are struggling to get stronger and healthier, take the path that is right for you, with advice and support from a good team of health care pros, and when you look in your mirror, see yourself as the warrior you are, and the beautiful woman you have always been.