We haven’t experienced being unemployed but one day he will retire from his second career position and I’m looking forward to spending my entire day with him.   He has a great sense of humor, an analytical mind and is a passionate caring human being.   When he is home and notices that something needs to be done he gets it done!    We enjoy each other very much and I am tremendously thankful to have him in my life.  In the evenings, he sets the table while I cook, clears the table and does the dishes!  

I look forward every day when I pick him up at the nearby train and see his smiling face waiting for me!   I’m a very lucky woman.   : )

My husband lost his job too about six years ago and since works on contract freeing his time at home for month long periods or more.  Yes, his presence throws a monkey wrench into our schedules, especially the children.

Don’t get me wrong, my husband is great with the kids and their sports handling that end.  When I work late he takes care of the boys and gets them ready for bed.  

But but having him around a lot is very challenging at times.  Initially, I dreamed of walking in the door to home cooked meals, a clean home and laundered clothes.  I think it happened once.  Your points are interesting and applicable in a much simpler approach.  I look at the task at hand and evaluate the urgency and then go accordingly.   

Since life is interesting and changes all the time I try to adapt quickly to the situation at hand.  Being the bread winner of the family at times is difficult but I am rewarded coming home to my family.    

There are many scenarios to be considered.

If the husband isn’t actively seeking employment he should be responsible for caring for the home, getting the children to and from school as well as sharing in the preparation of meals. in other-words, he should be doing all the tasks stay at home moms do. If there are no children he still should be responsible for the above. Once the husband returns to work than all responsibilities should be shared.

MG your husbands behavior is outrageous! He should be ashamed of himself! Are your college age children working at-least part time? How are they contributing to the household if not monetarily? You have got to set some rules. You’re allowing yourself to be a doormat. You’re not a hired servant.

Moira Lawson, you’re sweet for not discouraging your husband. Is there anyway the both of you can plan weekly meals and cook them on the weekend? Perhaps, you can slip in cooking lessons without him knowing? LOL

Everyone with wonderful and supportive mates you are indeed blessed!

I remember when my dad retired, there were some "issues" in the home. Suddenly he decided to become Mr. Supermarket Sweep! He spent hours clipping coupons for products my mother NEVER bought, used, or desired to have in the pantry. And speaking of pantries, he decided to reorganize things to the point where finding a box of elbow macaroni required a degree in physics. All of the spices were in alphabetical order. And he shopped - using those dratted coupons. "Look what I saved," he would boast, while my mother unpacked the tins of smoked oysters (On Special!), the large economy sized box of a cereal everyone - including my father - detested (Limited Time Offer!), and the other items that, years later, after both were gone, I bundled into trash bags and out went all the out-dated, money-saving stuff. Eventually, my folks worked it out, but not so diplomatically as suggested in this article, I’m afraid. I believe the phrase " … and stay the hell out of the A&P" was uttered.

This was a funny memory for me, but the article addresses a serious - and very sad - problem many women and men are facing in this economy. Maintaining a sense of dignity and a partnership in the face of such stress is a real balancing act. Kudos for the great tips, and for the good responses from readers.

That grading chart plumbs new depth of stupidity. How about if the questioner takes the self-important stick out of her self-important behind and show a little graititude that her man wants to help instead of her being an ungrateful B-word stereotype?