Editor’s Note: Paula Forman and her partner, Jeff Johnson, at Hourglass Consulting are the authors of The Hourglass Solution: A Boomer’s Guide to the Rest of Your Life. They will answer all your questions about work, relationships, and money. You can contact them at thehourglasssolution.com.

They say the recession is over … Yeah, sure.

I still believe unemployment will reach 10%.

And, even in the best of times, the best of us get fired.  The truth is, in my book, a pink slip is often a badge of courage. 

There are lots of reasons we lose our jobs – and a million stories in the naked city. You have years to swap signs and wonders with friends about how and why you got your walking papers, but right now, the priority is to get back in the ring with your self-esteem and your bank account intact.

There is a natural sequence to these things. It may take some time.

THE FIRST WEEK: You are in a state of shock and there are a lot of people around telling you how great you are and that this is “the best thing that ever happened” and not to worry. And mostly, you don’t worry.

THE SECOND WEEK: It is the same as the first week.

THE THIRD WEEK:  The people are gone and it’s getting scary. You feel depressed and lonely and the party is definitely over.  Your optimism is fading as your anxiety skyrockets.

Here are ten tips for getting back on track and managing your self and your job search:

1)    Apply for Unemployment Insurance. Right now. You won’t want to; there are many excuses – “I’ll have a new job before I get the first payment”; “It is embarrassing, a stigma”; “It means I really was fired.” Some people think they are ineligible for a variety of reasons from receiving severance pay (you are still eligible) or length of tenure.  Find out.  It is your money.  You earned it.  The process is easy and in most states can be handled online.

2)    Fed-Ex Office (formerly Kinko’s) is your New Best Friend. Now that the expensive machinery that makes corporate America work is no longer available, you have to find another way. Fed-Ex can do anything in any amount of time and it will look professional and they can send it out, too.  Drop by the one near you and take a look.  You will feel better when you realize you are not helpless.

3)    If your employer owned your computer and your BlackBerry, you have to buy one. This may not seem like the best time for a big cash outlay but you must have a computer and high-speed access or you might as well be in Siberia. Luddites do not get jobs.

4)    Write five different sentences that begin with the words “I got fired because I …” The point is to own the experience – not be a victim of it. “I got fired because my boss was a jerk” doesn’t cut it. Even if it’s true.  You need to understand that there were options; you need to take responsibility for what happened to you or you can’t take responsibility for what’s going to happen.

5)    Next you have to construct a simple non-defensive answer to the question, “What happened at your last job?”  It should not invite another question.  Try “I learned a lot, but it was time to move on.”  Say no more than that or you will lose control of the narrative.

6)    Don’t make lunch dates with people who have a job. They will inevitably cancel (because they have to – it’s not personal) and you will have planned your whole day around a non-happening event. If you want to network – and you should – offer to meet the other person at their office and stay no longer than 15 minutes. Be direct, ask for their help, then be gone.

7)    Write a new resume. Send it to one person you trust for review and comments.  A Web page is the 21st century format. Try it.