wowOwow - The Women on the Web

02/09/2010 5:00 am

Culture

Liz Smith: Football's Holy Day – Saints Win Super Bowl

Also from Our Gossip Girl, Madonna's holy day – Still giving it up to Jesus! … 'Dear John' weepie ain't crying; 'Avatar' is!

"Reporter: ‘Were you apprehensive in the twelfth inning?’

Yogi Berra: ‘No, but I was scared!’"

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I AM not a sports fan but this is pretty much the way lots of people felt during the Super Bowl. (I actually like to watch football being played; it’s something like ballet.)

So my impression of the Colts was that they were big, brutal steamrollers with the all-but-perfect aim of Peyton Manning, which would always propel them toward the goal line given enough time. There was almost no stopping them when they had the ball and it wasn’t pretty to watch.

But the Saints were brilliant bumblebees and one simply had to root for them to win, which they did, given the timing of quarters, their setback at one of the goal lines and the impressive manner in which they scored field goals, let alone their elusive high-stepping when they had the ball.

In a word, the Saints were charming and they certainly went marching in. So while there is no joy in Mudville (Indianapolis), I am really happy for all my friends in the Big Easy. This Super Bowl was like Rambo playing against Fred Astaire and the fancy footwork and darting talents of the latter saved the day for New Orleans fans.

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"TO THINK, I only had to wait 50 years for this!" That’s what Madonna told a friend months ago discussing her love affair with the 22-year-old Jesus Luz. (And she wasn’t just talking about the sex.) Mr. Luz is apparently attentive, tender and in tune with Madonna in a way she feels she missed out on with her two ex-husbands and, well, others …


Jesus & Madonna/Images: Robin Platzer-Twin Images/WireImages

Nobody believes me when I say it, but Madonna is an old-fashioned romantic. A bouquet of daisies and a candlelit dinner go a long way with famous women who can buy and sell any guy they meet. (As Elizabeth Taylor remarked of her last hubby, Larry Fortensky, who was 20 years her junior. "No boy is poor if he has a loving heart." And, no boy is poor if he can make a killing in the divorce settlement.)

Talk swirled last week that Madonna and Jesus had split. Within 48 hours of this gossip flurry, there they were in London, kissing up a storm at a movie premiere. She also chatted up her ex, Guy Ritchie, at the same event. And she danced like a dervish with a bevy of hot men at the after-party. (Insiders insist that Jesus will accompany Madonna to Rio on February 14 for Carnival.)

Do I think Madonna might marry Jesus? Not likely. She may be a romantic but she’s not a fool. Still, I expect this relationship to endure for several more happy years. More power to them both.

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AUTHOR and actor Michael Cristofer (he won the Pulitzer in 1977 for "The Shadow Box" and currently appears on Broadway in the smash hit revival of "A View From the Bridge") has written a screenplay that he thinks would be just perfect for his sexy, onstage co-stars – Scarlett Johansson and Liev Schreiber.

Cristofer told Playbill’s gifted scribe Harry Haun the following: "The screenplay is called "Fade Out" and it’s a sort of art-house thriller about a screenwriter having a breakdown to the extent that he can’t tell the difference between what he is writing and what’s for real."

When Scarlett and Liev find manuscripts outside their dressing-room doors, they’ll know from whence the work comes. It’s an inside job, kids!

"A View From the Bridge" is having an SRO run but is, unfortunately for audiences, a limited engagement and closes April 4, but if Cristofer has his way, the two stars will be together again.

Incidentally, Cristofer has written yet another play, which is called "Eyes Wide Open." He says, "It’s about infidelity. I haven’t shown it to anyone yet."