“Good-bye to caviar insoles!”

That’s a cartoon caption on the back page of Time’s Style & Design issue.

Barry Blitt devotes a full page to suggesting what the rich and richer will give up in these lean economic times.

Other semi-fictional sacrifices: "So long to mortgages available via ATM" … "Good riddance to bar mitzvahs and Sweet 16s held aboard the space station MIR" … "Sayonara to the personal weatherman to the CEO" … "Tipping the doorman with preferred stock in Lehman Brothers? Catch you later!" … "Expensive electronic devices in celebrity goody bags? Batteries no longer included!" … "Adios to free Julian Schnabel paintings when you open a new checking account!* (Wait — actually these are still available.)"

And if you’re determined to live beyond your means but afraid of being judged, move to South Korea. They love to spend unashamedly there. Time quotes a Seoul graduate student: “Many Korean girls like to have luxury brands. Even if they live in a box, they spend.”

Ruth Madoff, Seoul is calling you!

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Jacqueline Bisset! The famous star’s Thanksgiving film for the Hallmark channel, “An Old-Fashioned Thanksgiving,” became the highest-rated original drama in Hallmark’s history. And her episode arc on the perverse FOX series "Nip/Tuck" resulted in high ratings for that show.


Jacqueline Bisset in Hallmark’s "An Old-Fashioned Thanksgiving"

Now CBS has signed Bisset for a pilot, “The Eastmans,” which they hope will become a staple — it’ll showcase the traumas of a wealthy family connected to the medical field. Jackie will be the female lead.

When I interviewed Bisset a few months back, she said she wouldn’t mind the grind of a TV series, though she was thinking about comedy. (She is hilarious in Linda Yellen’s upcoming indie, “The Last Film Festival,” as a neurotic movie queen looking for a comeback; a star turn that is quite the opposite of the down-to-earth, realistic Miss B.)

Jackie’s first role in a movie was an uncredited bit in 1965’s “The Knack … and How to Get It.” She got it!

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Cloris Leachman! This great, Oscar-, Emmy- and Golden Globe-winning actress has a new memoir, Cloris, out any minute. In it, she tells all — or at least, a lot — about her colorful and varied love life. (She was married from 1953 to 1979 to one George Englund. Actually, they married twice. But there was life before, in between and after George!)


Does this force of nature, this recent “Dancing With the Stars” phenom, reveal her love of nudity in her book? She has always kept a great figure, and is quite the “naturalist.” Stories abound of her relaxed attitude. Once, a messenger was instructed by Cloris’s housekeeper to go to the backyard. There, the guy found TV’s “Phyllis,” in the raw, barbecuing chicken. A Chicago reporter recalls going up to a hotel suite for an interview. The actress answered the door stark naked. I’d say that is one hell of a conversation starter!

Now you can see Cloris, fully clothed, on April 4 in Hallmark’s “Love Takes Wing.” She plays the matron of an Old West orphanage. The movie co-stars Haylie Duff, Sarah Jones, Patrick Duffy, Lou Diamond Phillips and Kevin Scott Richardson.

Cloris Leachman was born in 1926. But don’t tell her; she doesn’t know it.

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Entertainment Weekly reviews Britney Spears’s "Circus" concert tour with the two most important words possible: “lucid and fit.” The show is selling out too. Rumors of her career demise are premature. (So what if she lip-syncs a lot? If you want singing, find Tony Bennett!)