The Liz Smith Column | 10/15/2009 4:00 am
Liz Smith: Jon and Kate Plus the Lohans – Mommies and Daddies Dearest?
Our Gossip Girl also asks: Was Lindsay’s fashion collection really that bad?
Lindsay Lohan © AP
"There may be some doubt as to who are the best people to have charge of children, but there can be no doubt that parents are the worst," said George Bernard Shaw.
***
Even a confirmed cynic like Mr. Shaw must be spinning at the antics of "celebrity parents," such as the soon-to-be-divorced Jon and Kate Gosselin, and the long-divorced Michael and Dina Lohan (parents of the tabloid-magnet Lindsay).
The Gosselins are a template for the late 20th- and early 21st-century obsession to become famous by any means. In Kate Gosselin’s case, she got herself a passel of invitro-ed sextuplets (she already had twins) and then decided to push them all on TV, because, guess what, these parents had no money to support their brood. The once-respectable Learning Channel put these deadbeats on the air.
In the years that the show "Jon & Kate Plus 8" has been inflicted on America, Kate has revealed herself as a steely-eyed control freak with high ambitions for a life outside of her home – she wants to be a star, a talk-show hostess.
Jon, her hubby, is an overweight, dim, resentful sad sack with a spine of jelly. He’s the type who could turn any woman into a shrew. He has ambitions too. He wants to party with ladies who haven’t given birth to eight children and who don’t correct him every five minutes.
The J&K saga has devolved into charges of looted bank accounts, judicial arbitrations and sudden, passionate "epiphanies" – the latter courtesy of Jon, who has shut the show down "for the sake of his exploited children." He did this the day after he was essentially fired from the series.
General ugliness and unconvincing weeping from both parties is an almost daily occurrence. The no-nonsense Kate has had no epiphanies. She says she must continue to use her kids, because how else is she going to support them? And anyway, there’s that career as the new Kelly Ripa to ponder. This unattractive, emotionally stunted, intellectually barren couple now dominates the glossy magazine covers, often acing out Brad and Angie, who are at least great looking and work for a living.
There is no escape from the Gosselins. Trust me.
Some people say the Gosselins’ kids should be taken away from their camera-ready parents, that they have been abused and harmed in the process of being moneymaking props on a TV show. Well, the same could be said about any child actor on a normal sitcom or series. Or any child actor, period. (There are occasional exceptions such as Jodie Foster, who appears to have been born with wisdom, as well as talent.)
The Jon and Kate children will most likely be harmed by the antics and instability of their parents. But that’s not real abuse; it’s just a lousy childhood. I see therapy couches.
***
As for the Lohans – what a pair! Daddy Michael was in trouble with the law for a long time – stock fraud, for which he was jailed four years, probation violation (more jail), violating a court order to stay away from his children (and still more jail time!). He is afflicted with terminal verbal diarrhea, and can’t-stay-away-from-the-camera-itis. Almost always he is talking about his famous daughter.
The mother, Dina, is a ferociously taut, blonde Mama Rose, who saw a moneymaking "Gypsy" in the talented Lindsay. She has lived and partied vicariously through – and sometimes with – her daughter, existing in a heightened state of denial. "There’s nothing wrong with Lindsay, blame it on her youth." That was a passable excuse when Lohan was 16, 17, 18, 19. Now she is 23, a woman. And while Lindsay may not be the melting mess that websites such as TMZ and Perez insist she is, there is some reason to believe she still has "issues."
***
Even a confirmed cynic like Mr. Shaw must be spinning at the antics of "celebrity parents," such as the soon-to-be-divorced Jon and Kate Gosselin, and the long-divorced Michael and Dina Lohan (parents of the tabloid-magnet Lindsay).
The Gosselins are a template for the late 20th- and early 21st-century obsession to become famous by any means. In Kate Gosselin’s case, she got herself a passel of invitro-ed sextuplets (she already had twins) and then decided to push them all on TV, because, guess what, these parents had no money to support their brood. The once-respectable Learning Channel put these deadbeats on the air.
In the years that the show "Jon & Kate Plus 8" has been inflicted on America, Kate has revealed herself as a steely-eyed control freak with high ambitions for a life outside of her home – she wants to be a star, a talk-show hostess.
Jon, her hubby, is an overweight, dim, resentful sad sack with a spine of jelly. He’s the type who could turn any woman into a shrew. He has ambitions too. He wants to party with ladies who haven’t given birth to eight children and who don’t correct him every five minutes.
The J&K saga has devolved into charges of looted bank accounts, judicial arbitrations and sudden, passionate "epiphanies" – the latter courtesy of Jon, who has shut the show down "for the sake of his exploited children." He did this the day after he was essentially fired from the series.
General ugliness and unconvincing weeping from both parties is an almost daily occurrence. The no-nonsense Kate has had no epiphanies. She says she must continue to use her kids, because how else is she going to support them? And anyway, there’s that career as the new Kelly Ripa to ponder. This unattractive, emotionally stunted, intellectually barren couple now dominates the glossy magazine covers, often acing out Brad and Angie, who are at least great looking and work for a living.
There is no escape from the Gosselins. Trust me.
Some people say the Gosselins’ kids should be taken away from their camera-ready parents, that they have been abused and harmed in the process of being moneymaking props on a TV show. Well, the same could be said about any child actor on a normal sitcom or series. Or any child actor, period. (There are occasional exceptions such as Jodie Foster, who appears to have been born with wisdom, as well as talent.)
The Jon and Kate children will most likely be harmed by the antics and instability of their parents. But that’s not real abuse; it’s just a lousy childhood. I see therapy couches.
***
As for the Lohans – what a pair! Daddy Michael was in trouble with the law for a long time – stock fraud, for which he was jailed four years, probation violation (more jail), violating a court order to stay away from his children (and still more jail time!). He is afflicted with terminal verbal diarrhea, and can’t-stay-away-from-the-camera-itis. Almost always he is talking about his famous daughter.
The mother, Dina, is a ferociously taut, blonde Mama Rose, who saw a moneymaking "Gypsy" in the talented Lindsay. She has lived and partied vicariously through – and sometimes with – her daughter, existing in a heightened state of denial. "There’s nothing wrong with Lindsay, blame it on her youth." That was a passable excuse when Lohan was 16, 17, 18, 19. Now she is 23, a woman. And while Lindsay may not be the melting mess that websites such as TMZ and Perez insist she is, there is some reason to believe she still has "issues."
Read more about: Angelina Jolie, Celebrities, Dina Lohan, Entertainment, Estrella Archs, Fashion, George Bernard Shaw, Gossip, Jodie Foster, Jon Gosselin, Jon Voight, Kate Gosselin, Kelly Ripa, Lindsay Lohan, Liz Smith, Michael Lohan, News
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58 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment
Liz, do you remember the Hollywood Mother’s Club? Enough said. Joan Crawford wasn’t the only "Mommie Dearest" in Hollywood. As long as there’s a klieg light and a gossip columnist somewhere, there will always be mothers, and now fathers, living vicariously through their children.
Sensational sells. And the more scandalous the better. Lindsay has a long way to go to move beyond the image that was as much created for her as she created for herself. She is still the girl who can do no right.
As for the media itself you can look at what happened to Elizabeth Taylor just recently. She "pre-announced" her hospitalization complete with diagnosis and treatment. Some in the media added that she had diabetes. The media has announced her impending death so many times that when it finally happens, no one will believe it.
Liz, like you I believe that many fashion insiders and gossip blogs prejudged the the Ungaro line as a flop as soon as Lindsay became associated with it. With each gleeful condemnation of the Ungaro line from the so-called fashion insiders, I find myself rooting for Lindsay even more.
I encourage my children to find creative expression for themselves and on their own terms. I have my own body of work.
Their lives are theirs, once they leave my nest I know I have given them the tools they need by the examples I created by living my life.
My son is very talented, and he needs to find how his path works for him.
Like I said, I have my own body of work. PennDragonStudios.com
and my husband has his, GypsyDreamsProductions.com and his creative group PowerHouseMediaEnterprises.com
What our children do is up to them, my only hope is that they find happiness, love, and fulfillment on the paths they choose for themselves by the choices they make.
What other people have done is of no interest to me. Because my focus is teaching my children by example how hard work and effort is how one finds success and truth by example by creating my body of work.
Amy, PennDragon Studios
I completely agree.
Amy, PennDragon Studios
simpletownUSA.com
Maybe some of our youth could draw a lesson from Lohan’s bad fashion reviews. Maybe the designs were not so hideous; maybe the reviews were spurred by an expectation of failure. But if so, that was based on the history she has built for herself and has not yet even begun to overcome (Drew Barrymore could tell people something about how hard it is to overcome a pre-established reputation).
The lesson for your average kid is: do not abase yourself on Facebook with drunken photos, brainless antics, or outrageous remarks; nor in front of your so-called friends, who will be only too quick to capture your most embarrassing youthful moments on their ubiquitous cell phones, and upload the pictures or video for everyone to see… your family, your other friends, your teachers, your prospective employers… and once that reputation is established, it taints everything afterward.
I can remember when the "octo-mom" first became news, almost all of us on WoW were in an uproar "how can anyone be so irresponsible as to knowingly given birth to so many children when she can barely support the ones she already has?" Yet the Gosselin’s (because they were married) somehow got a pass. They have proven they are no different.
I myself am missing this particular gene, but I do understand the desire some women have to give birth. To have a baby or two (or three or four, etc. etc.) but if you can’t take care of them financially, why have them? And if you are fine with struggling, then I say go for it. I have 10 siblings and my Father always provided for us. So I get it. But this pathetic whining Kate is doing about how she has to keep the show because this is the only way she can support her children….Really?
What if the show was cancelled? What were you going to do then Kate? Had you and Jon not thought of that? I find them both terribly irresponsible and my sympathies lie with the children solely.
I completely agree.
Amy, PennDragon Studios
simpletownUSA.com
Belinda, I am with you on several points here! I am also missing the biological-clock gene, but cannot for the life of me understand why anyone would go through expensive IVF treatments to very intentionally have children they have no means of supporting. The Gosselins get no pass from me!
The NYT also has some good articles this week on the real risks, dangers, and heartbreak of high-order multiples. No one is doing their children any favors by producing in litters. The reader comments on this article are telling.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/11/health/11fertility.html?scp=2&sq=babie…Any child who is sent out to work in the public eye is being pimped.
Jodie Foster is an exceptionally intelligent and talented woman and her mother did make it a point to educate her well but Ms. Foster hardly escaped from the demons of an unbalanced parent child relationship. She is highly functioning and has crafted what appears to be a happy life but emerged with emotional scars.
Perhaps all children do and certainly it is hard to say whether she would have been happier if she had lived a live of more modest and "normal" accomplishments with only the normal neuroses of the middle class child.
Paul Petersen’s Minor Consideration is a foundation to assist former child "performers".
http://www.minorcon.org/
While the Gosselins and Lohans are the uber versions of exploitative horrendous parents, given the odds, what loving or responsible parent would choose this road.