“Cows with names produce 3.4 percent more milk than nameless cows,” writes Harper’s magazine. Hmmm, Harper’s, the publication of agriculture.

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I am a big admirer of the gay Village Voice columnist Michael Musto, who never minds calling a pitchfork a pitchfork. He would be a big international byline if he had eschewed being famous with ten percent of the population instead of with all of it.

Here’s one of the funniest things I’ve read lately, direct from La Dolce Musto: “Two prized daughters, Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson, have been carrying on tempestuously lately, what with all the window breaking and screaming fights, followed by the inevitable makeup sessions … Well, a friend of mine swears that this is patented lesbian behavior. She says the obsessive-compulsive thing of getting under your partner’s skin in a way where you can’t live with or without each other is extremely Sapphic.

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson © Getty Images

“Really? So Sean and Robin Wright Penn are lesbians?” 

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I love the Huffington Post blogger who says I should not have interviewed Bill O’Reilly in a courteous manner, should not have treated him to a “softball” Q & A. Who sez?

It’s still a free country for journalists to interview people in whatever manner seems fitting. I didn’t think on the eve of the celebration of his 100th-month triumph I needed to drag in the MSNBC feud regarding O’Reilly, nor did I need to dredge up questions about legal battles that were settled out of court. 

As I wrote in the interview — I like Bill O’Reilly. I seldom agree with him and he knows that and he doesn’t give a damn. This was just two people talking. Sorry there was no mud wrestling for Arianna’s turf.

Come to think of it, if I had interviewed the blogger’s editor, Arianna, whom I have known since before Hector got a dog license, I wouldn’t have asked her a lot of embarrassing questions either. Every interview doesn’t have to be down and dirty.