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Liz Smith | 05/28/2009 11:00 pm

Liz Smith Talks About Her Stress

Liz Smith
I carry my stress in my shoulders like most people, or at least that’s what the massage therapists always make me feel I am doing. I guess I also carry a lot of it in my mind, as these days I have a hard time going to sleep, staying asleep and ceasing to list and recount my sins, my errors and my worries when the lights go out. I expect this is more prevalent, more epidemic than the swine flu. Two aspirin help at bedtime. I don’t like sleeping pills. 

7 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

joan larsen

Liz,

As you might guess, I always read your words closely.  As we move forward on our life’s path, we come across lines in the sidewalk that might be considered chapters in our lives.  Suddenly, almost without warning, as in your case, we find we have stepped over the crack.  And then - oh my God - then what?

You, dear Liz, you have been pushed over the crack.  And, as a livewire that you are, you have to be turning over in your mind:  where do I go from here?  You happen to be loved, revered, and we who are not quite yet at your place on the sidewalk are watching to see the "new re-creation"of Liz.  For if Liz can weather storms, so can we!

But I am going to speak for all of us when I say that your pedestal is very secure.  Something that is just right — perhaps a new man :-) - will fall in your lap.  There will be surprises around every turn.  But, for gosh sake, get your beauty sleep for your evenings on the town and to keep us thinking:  how did Liz come upon that fountain of youth?  None of that tossing and turning for it is life wasted.  I find that at some unpredictable moment with no planning at all, the answers to "what’s next?" will be clear. 

In the meantime, darling Liz, we are oh so glad you are here with us!!!  Joan

 

 

By joan larsen on 05/29/2009 1:53 am
Eileen Alannah
I have come up with a remedy for when I find myself ruminating on sad thoughts whether I am trying to get to sleep or not. "Does this thought make me happy?" If it does not, it goes. I try to toss it away as quickly as I would swat a fly that was disturbing me. Like the thought itself is poison (which it is). It’s not easy and it doesn’t work all the time but it is a *tool* that I use sometimes and with practice I’ll get good at it, I hope! I don’t know where I carry my stress but the other day I said I wanted to put my one good foot through a wall so maybe I carry it in my feet. haha
By Eileen Alannah on 05/29/2009 10:07 am
O E

Liz, I, too, suffer insomnia occasionally.  It’s a writer’s curse. My remedy, which I’ve recommended to friends and  it works, is the following: Drink a cup of hot chamomile tea (a soporific)  about 1/2 hour before you go to bed.  When you lie down (on your back, arms to the side, not touching the body, legs slightly apart) breath deeply into your abdomen and release the air slowly through your mouth at the same time relaxing the muscles in your body.  Any thoughts that come to intrude, dismiss them as unimportant; they’re not at this time. Do this while you listen to soft, instrumental music or a relaxation tape of nature sounds.  Allow your mind to be taken over by the sounds. My clock/alarm/radio/CD player  has a timer.  I set it to 59 minutes.  Invariable, when I wake up the next morning, I don’t even remember hearing the end of the first cut on the CD.  Works better than pills, but not better than sex.

By O E on 05/29/2009 12:17 pm
Richard Bassett
I think one of the reasons that we do obsess over our past mishaps and transgressions is ,at the time of the obsession, we have a complete picture of what our actions caused. When we are faced with choices and desicions, we usually always go out on a limb, never really knowing the consequences of our actions until they actually take place. Then it is to late to remedy the situation, thus, we ponder over what we could have been done instead, what we should have done instead and what could we have done differently. And these thoughts invaded our mind when we are most vulnerable….in the middle of the night, when we are trying to disengage from the troubles of our day. I have learned that the coulda, woulda, shoulda sydrome only pertepuates the obsession and at some point, I have to say: "Stop. What is done is done." Liz, in your situation, I am sure that you are constantly making desicions over what to print, who to include, how to post a delicate issue, knowing what the ramifications could be. And judging by the quanity of your work, these choices have to be made rather quickly. And once it is said…it is out there 100%. I think you are a fantastic, insightful journalist and posess a deep sense of self trust in what you reveal to the public but you are still subjected to the same uncertainties that we all are. Maybe ever more so. If trust is earned, then you are the epitome of trust. Your body of work has stood the test of time and continues to interest and intrigue us all. Being aware of all of this, sleep should come easily for you. You continue to leave your mark with your honesty and your thought provoking style. Sleep well, dear one. You are truly loved!
By Richard Bassett on 05/29/2009 1:53 pm
Eileen Alannah
What a wonderful post you sent to Liz, Richard. I think also that one has to embrace the "grace" that forgiveness offers. A nice pillow on which to rest one’s head at night. No-one is immune to mistakes and so when Liz mentions the "Golden Rule" in other comments of hers then she does know that what you "give" to others then that you can also "take." (which *is* hard to do when one holds oneself to a higher standard, like you said, but still, if we all did that we could just relax and be one big happy family of occasional screw-ups who possess some very good hearts.  ; )
By Eileen Alannah on 05/30/2009 8:34 am
albert miller
If we could just realize that we never made a wrong decision, but only the decision that our life program required, we would be better off. Part of the punishment of life however, is that we can’t emotionally seperate ourselves from "wrong" decisions, as though we had the ability to always be right. All these negative results that give us tension are part of the requirements of our life story. The best way to sleep is to envision blackness, blackness, only blackness, and you will suddenly waken. It takes practice, but it works. You can’t think of two things at once.
By albert miller on 05/29/2009 11:51 pm
Paula Kwakenat
Dear Liz, as far as trouble sleeping, and thinking of the things that can make you anxious, just remember Rosie Clooney singing "Count your Blessings"!  It may sound cheesey, but from personal experience, it works!!  Most of us (thank God) have more blessings than we realize, and when we actually start to think of all of them, it’s much easier to relax and head to the Land of Nod.
By Paula Kwakenat on 09/03/2009 2:42 pm