The Liz Smith Column | 04/13/2009 12:00 am

Vanity Fair Ladies: Joni Evans, Gisele Bündchen, Jane Fonda and … Mary Elizabeth Smith

More from Our Gossip Girl: Apples and Oranges and earthquakes – Oh, my!

“Heaven on a stick!” This is how the writer Joan Juliet Buck of Vogue magazine described the writing of Oswald Spengler, whom, of course, I have never read — not being a deep thinker of Joan’s stripe. (His famous book is The Decline of the West.)

This was just one of a series of amusing comments that came out of a leisurely lunch at La Grenouille, the last of the great French restaurants on New York’s east side. We were in Charles Masson’s lair, where the famous of Women’s Wear Daily, the glamour magazines and what’s left of society have lunched for eons. In this setting, with bouquets of spring blossoms reaching almost to the ceiling, I had some kind of enhanced fois gras and Dover sole, plus an amazing chocolate soufflé.

My companions were the aforesaid Joan, the writer Marie Brenner and the archaeologist Iris Love, who had departed the Abruzzi area right before the earthquake. (Iris opined that the authorities had been warning everyone for a year that a great quake was imminent and they had been experiencing frequent pre-shocks. I asked if the antiquities Iris had been cataloging there were lost in the rubble. She said, “Fortunately, no. They had been moved.”)

Marie was all excited about the paperback advent of her much-praised book, Apples and Oranges, which was a critical sensation last year. It made eight "ten best" lists, including The New York Times, even though her publisher had few books ready for the public to buy. Here’s hoping the paperback will fare better and, after Marie reads from it at the Literacy Partners event in Lincoln Center on May 11, this wonderful book should really take off. (It concerns sibling rivalry and dysfunctional emotional confusion at its best. Ms. Brenner, who also toils for Vanity Fair, is a masterful journalist as well as a creative writer.)

Joan Buck is redoing her West Side loft getting ready to offer a dinner celebrating another writer, Allegra Huston, who has a new autobiography – Love Child — telling of her life as the almost-lost offspring of the late famous movie director, John Huston.

I have lived in New York since 1949 but never before have I heard anyone extol or rave about or recommend her contractor! Joan even gave me Neal Asanaj’s card for D.D. Interiors, Inc. So give Neal a call at (212) 685-8989 if you are building or rebuilding something in the New York area.

After a lifetime of shifting between Texas roadkill, fast-food palaces and the great cuisine restaurants, I have decided – yes, La Grenouille (the frog) beats all the others. Believe me, there was no recession going on at 3 East 52 Street.

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Some months back, the distaff side of the infamous Page Six (Paula Froelich) showed me a mockup of her coming “chick lit” book titled Mercury in Retrograde. At that time, it featured Paula herself bending over in an extended backflip.

Now, Paula says all that has changed and her novel has a more “Sex and the City”-type apartment building on the cover, with sexy broads looking out of the windows.

Paula created MySpace accounts for two of her fiction’s characters – “Penelope Mercury” and “Lena Lippencrass.”

The artist Marisa Marchetto drew likenesses of “Penelope” and “Lena” and they are on MySpace and Twitter feeds. But for “Lena,” the author used a picture from her own 30th birthday party and added the hair of true-life glamour girl Cornelia Guest.

This character is a readymade hit. “Lena” has already had two marriage proposals on MySpace and Paula says she is feeling schizophrenic handling the real and unreal personalities in her life.

Get the hot-books list ready for Mercury in Retrograde.

12 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

What a great post/column!

Love VF, La Grenouille [the flowers!], Jane Fonda [great answers who she loathes, ditto]…Marie Brenner [will go look up her book this minute, love her and interested esp in title about brother] and that Joan Juliet Buck is redoing her loft. Pictures pls….that must be fab.

Liz, you have THE life! I’ll be sure to pick-up VF this month…often just read online.

By 3 on 04/13/2009 1:32 am

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I learned that "wear red" trick from a former employer, especially if you are going to be photographed in a sea of men, for example, the floors of Congress. It’s a great way for finding each other.

I love when a restaurant has beautiful blooms around, and Spring has some great ones to offer up.

I have read some of the articles in Vanity Fair. I thought Gisele came off as very pretty in her photographs and vapid in her comments. As for the more weighty articles, they need to wait…I’ve got to get through Orhan Pamuk’s Snow, since there is no more snow, here or in Turkey.

P.S. My friends called me up tonight and sang "Easter Parade" to me on the telephone. It was on television. I thought that was rather sweet.

By WashingtonCube on 04/13/2009 3:14 am

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Liz - i’ve alwasy wondered what exactly "IS" society? really? your post has a "what’s left of society" line. what exactly does that mean? who ARE those people? and whose left lol? are they rockefellers or johnson and johnson people or Kennedy’s? is that society? what qualifies someone to be "society"?

As for Jane…. makes me sad. I read her book. she wants to be loved. she’s been as perfect as she possibly could to make that happen. brilliant and beautiful, succesful and talented and she marries… Ted (f—- around) Turner? and what’s his name the director. it’s always amazed me how women who want so badly to be loved and accepted pick men who can’t really love and accept ANYONE. Maybe she should go for the lighting guy next lol… skip the mogul.

By ChromeToe on 04/13/2009 9:58 am

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"Society" consists of the (usually rich but, if not rich in money, then rich in royal or quasi-royal genes) people that other people enjoy reading about when they don’t want to read the serious news. "Society" excludes, however, anyone who wants to be written about. Thus, Paris Hilton is not "Society" and neither is Rush Limbaugh. By contrast, the Princess Hohenzolern von und zu Salzburgerknockerli is a member of "Society" and we love to read about the fantastic Easter hat that she wore as she walked, in six-inch heels, down Fifth Avenue, accompanied by her seven French bulldogs and an unidentified but extremely tanned and well-dressed man of half her age, trying not to be noticed.

By SamMirando on 04/13/2009 9:48 pm

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So….. Paris Hilton isn’t society even though she’s a Hilton? and Rush Limbaugh isn’t society even though he makes a bzillion dollars a year? because they WANT to be written about and noticed? so does that mean actors and actresses in general aren’t society? hmmm… does that mean Vanessa Redgrave isn’t society? even though i’ve never seen her seek out any tab reporting? or IS she society because she doesn’t! lol! would Bernie Madoff been considered socity before he got caught being a simple criminal? hmmm…. things that make you go hmmmm…

By ChromeToe on 04/13/2009 11:26 pm

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Right, Paris is NOT "Society" because, by making a public spectacle of herself, she has courted too much publicity. Rush…? Money has nothing to do with "Society." Vanessa Redgrave is not "Society" because she is an actress; she is "Society" because she is part of an acting dynasty (rich in genes) but/and doesn’t make a public spectacle of herself. Bernie Madoff was not and did not seek to be part of "Society."

By SamMirando on 04/14/2009 8:18 am

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yep… i’m not ever going to really know who society is. But i’ll go out on a limb here and say that WHO society IS is probably largely subjective. Depending on the background and belief systems of whomever is making the judgement!

By ChromeToe on 04/14/2009 10:34 am

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You’d recognize members of "Society" if you had to. But don’t worry if you think you’d flunk the test. There are more important things in life that deserve your attention :)

By SamMirando on 04/14/2009 12:18 pm

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This evening the Turner Movie Channel aired an interview of Jane Fonda by Robert Osborne done about two years ago. I watched the first half of the interview and was absolutely amazed to see Jane Fonda holding back tears as she talked of her early work in films. She admits she was darn lucky but inasmuch as she was then a very shy girl, she experienced a torturous time with the Studios … one of whom recommended that she have her jaw broke and realigned in order to give her face a more angular appearance. Just the thing to make a shy actress feel confident. Jane also talked just a bit about her early marriage to Vadim …. said she simply grew into a different woman and needed to divorce him.

Anyway, an interesting interview. When they got to the part about her VietNam days, I turned the channel. Did not need to hear anymore about those activities.

By Bonnie Oliver on 04/14/2009 7:16 am

Bonnie - Jane Fonda’s autobiography was absolutely fascinating. and the part about her vietnam era activites was also fascinating. you’d have to read it for yourself as i have a horrible horrible memory for facts and can’t explain it to you. But you should read it. That picture of her that is so famous has a super interesting story behind it. she was very much set up for taht photo by the vietnamese. if you read what her intentions were and the history behind some of what she was doing over there it’s much different than it was portrayed in the mass media. Not at all what people thought. and i for one like to remind people that when it comes to vietnam… the protesters that thought we shouldn’t be there and thought we were killing our kids for no reason ended up being right. 100% right for that matter.

By ChromeToe on 04/14/2009 10:38 am

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Chrome Toe- It cannot be denied from the video shot the day "that photograph" was taken that Jane Fonda was laughing with the North Vietnamese and rather gaily swinging around on the seat of the anti-artillery gun….the gun being used to kill American GIs. We cannot fight that war again but I remember vividly what the GIs thought of Jane Fonda at the time. Have some listened to her added explanation - probably. Does it make a difference? Not a bit.

Millions of Americans believe that the anti-war protest during that era was responsible for extending the war for years …. but that is a debate that will still be ongoing by future students and generations.

By Bonnie Oliver on 04/14/2009 2:21 pm