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A Friend Stopped By | 10/11/2009 3:00 am

'Whatever' and More Communication Offenses That Annoy People, by Sybil Adelman Sage

By Sybil Adelman Sage

Editor’s note: Sybil Adelman Sage, one of the first women to break into television writing, is currently working on a fictitious memoir titled Diary of an Overachiever: Mensa Model Finishes First in NYC Marathon After Solving Economic Problems and Proposing Health Plan Praised by Democrats and Republicans Alike. 

A recent poll taken by Marist College to determine which words are most annoying in conversation showed that the winner — well, actually, the loser — getting 47% of the vote was "whatever" (pronounced WHAT-ev-err). It beat out "you know," which irritates 25% of the respondents, "it is what it is" (11%), "anyway" (7%) and "at the end of the day" (2%). Conspicuously missing for me was "like," a longtime favored verbal tic in the younger set.

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I may be more prickly than the Marist respondents because my list is much longer. I’m agitated by the use of "frankly" and "quite frankly," typically inserted before the third clause of a construction and never introducing anything more revealing or shocking than what preceded it. Even more disturbing to me is the recurring use of "sort of," overwhelmingly the favorite of academics, pundits and writers on cable news networks as well as guests on NPR. "Sort of" seems to be the sophisticated version of "like," used to sound more informal with both, judging by their frequency of usage, being addictive.

At the risk of sounding Andy Rooneyish, what’s the deal with the nodding response, that repeated bobbing up and down of the head by the listener, followed by, "OK"? 

Have these all been introduced by one person with a huge social network? And what causes them to go viral? I propose we fight the national debt by creating a category known as "communication offenses" and fining the guilty.      

100 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

phyllisDoylePepe
If I could have a John,  telling me in breathy murmur, that he will be my server, I would have to, graciously with slight huskiness of voice, ask what, pray tell, was he prepared to serve? This simple request, I would think, will put him in the position of ignoring me completely or blushing profusely thereby rendering him dumb and less unctuous in the rest of his applications. If this self same John gave me a cork to smell from a year old wine, I would tip him generously because very soon he will be out of a job.
By phyllisDoylePepe on 10/12/2009 6:39 pm
Rho

For me the worst one is "it is what it is" — drives me nuts.

 

By Rho on 10/11/2009 10:26 am
BabySnooks
The legal version of "it is what it is" is "the thing speaks for itself" which in itself is not conducive to discussion. Quite irritating indeed but often quite true. 
By BabySnooks on 10/11/2009 10:36 am
georgiafatwood
Res ipsa loquitor? Put that in your arsenal!
By georgiafatwood on 10/12/2009 7:59 am
georgiafatwood

Hello again, Ms. Snooks…there is a funny collection of modern day proverbs in Latin under Henry Beard at wikiquote…..when you drop them into polite conversation, they sound perfectly grand. ("Latin For All Occasions"…Henry Beard) Some of them are a hoot in translation….

 

By georgiafatwood on 10/12/2009 9:09 am
carengittleman
hates…………………………."kewl"……………..makes me cringe!!!
By carengittleman on 10/11/2009 10:32 am
SusanCrawford

In no particular order:

"y’know?"

"random" [as in "I met some random guy at the club."]

"going forward" ["We must work as a team going forward."]

"So anyways" ["So anyways, it was a pretty good day."]

"bored of" ["I am so bored of … "]

"excellent" ["Excellent party, dude!"]

"you guys" [When applied to women, or to a group of men AND women]

"Eeeeeeuuwww" [Can we no longer register disgust in any other way than this squealing noise?]

"kinda" and "sorta" [Is it - - - or isn’t it?]

And a couple of mispronounciations:

Axed for asked

di-unt or dint for didn’t

And Baby Snooks, I laughed out loud at the "employees are our best asset" line! My advice: the moment you hear management spouting this cliche - start updating the resume! All hell will soon be breaking loose.

By SusanCrawford on 10/11/2009 12:01 pm
georgiafatwood
Susan…hi…re: "going forward"..how about "return back" or "continue on"  "rethink again"  etc…
By georgiafatwood on 10/12/2009 9:00 am
ObediahFults
How about "3 a.m. in the morning"? [cringe]
By ObediahFults on 10/12/2009 12:06 pm
SusanCrawford
I know! If I "went forward" as often as I’m told, I’d be somewhere in the 22nd Century by now! (With no way to "return back", either.) ;->
By SusanCrawford on 10/12/2009 5:41 pm
PatriceBaldwin
Oh, yes, ‘Let us continya on’ was one of President Johnson’s favorites. And President Eisenhower always said, "Nukuler" instead of nuclear. Drives me nuts.
By PatriceBaldwin on 10/12/2009 9:05 pm
KatyDidWells
"Axed for asked" - aargh… instant cringe!
By KatyDidWells on 10/12/2009 5:14 pm
BonnieO

1)  It is not personal.

2)  I told you so.

3)  Can you believe it?

4)  The people have the right to know.  The mantra of nosy reporters  who apply the "right" with prejudice.

5)  The phrases  24/7  and    tick-dock, tick-dock.

By BonnieO on 10/11/2009 12:01 pm
phyllisDoylePepe
Bonnie, your number one reminded me of another––"To be honest"––always found that strange as though they usually aren’t.
By phyllisDoylePepe on 10/11/2009 6:42 pm
sybil
I’m waiting for:  amazing, totally, "no problem" in response to "thank you" and "backatcha."  Where are all the other cranks?
By sybil on 10/11/2009 12:33 pm