Editor’s Note: Who is the wisest of them all? Who is more dedicated to your pleasure than anyone on earth? Who can help you when you’re going online for the first time to find love; or when your lover’s children hate you; or when you want to strangle your husband? Why, the Love Goddess, of course. She promises nothing less than celestial wisdom, heavenly sex, divine dating. Read on …
1. Everyone of all ages will be dating, dating, dating throughout 2010.
An unprecedented 100 million singles in America means they – unmarried people – make up the majority of households. The one ongoing fact of adult life in 2010 will be a flurry of dating, not only among teens and twenty-somethings, but among the millions of adults of all ages – 30s through 70s – who are between marriages.
2. We will all become more misty-eyed about marriage in 2010.
As marriage has become increasingly fragile, we’ve begun increasingly to idealize it. I predict that marriage – as a concept – will be idealized more than ever because we continue divorcing. (For a look at what I mean, go see George Clooney in “Up in the Air,” and note the unnecessary heavy-handedness about the joys of togetherness.)
3. We will see online dating sites scrambling to nail down love’s chemistry in 2010.
Courtship – that leisurely process by which prospective lovers once got to know each other before marrying – has already been replaced by Internet dating, the process by which strangers try to learn whether they’re compatible before they agree to meet. Next the sites will try to promise sexual compatibility. But meanwhile, my darlings, a tip: Meet your online contacts AS SOON AS POSSIBLE and decide the chemistry for yourself.
4. In 2010 a woman will want a man to love, but will need one less.
With increasing wealth among women of all classes in America, combined with increasing divorce rates, women will increasingly see marriage as a place for emotional – but not necessarily financial – security.
5. With women more willing to leave bad relationships (over two thirds of all divorces are initiated by wives), love and romance will become more woman-friendly in 2010.
Shared roles, intimate connection and egalitarian pay are what I mean by woman-friendly. (Beware Internet dating, though, my darlings, where some disenfranchised men don’t take kindly to this trend.)
6. Men’s attitudes toward marriage will continue to be more favorable than women’s in 2010.
It was once assumed that women wanted marriage more than men. No more. Women in high-powered careers know how difficult it is to run the homes they want without the help they need, and have expressed more ambivalence about wedlock.
7. In 2010, both genders will feel less pressure to wed when they’re very young.
The astronomical number of singles struggling to find careers in a culture that no longer guarantees these careers suggests that young people can now stay single and date for years without being marginalized by the culture.
8. There will be less societal pressure on marriages to last in 2010.
Even now, with billion-dollar initiatives to support marriage, it is no longer a matter of “as long as we both shall live” – but rather, “as long as we both shall LOVE.” Love is a feeling … and a mutable one. Couples will still yearn for forever, but they’ll simply be less inclined – and less pressured – to stay the course.
9. More men and women will become friends in 2010.
The huge number of people becoming involved on the Internet – many of whom will be meeting, dating and then breaking up – means more platonic friendships between many of them.
10. The men most able to develop the skills of intimacy will be the men most in demand in 2010.
There will be a huge increase in the kind of emotionally sophisticated, relationally skilled men with whom women have always hoped to be involved. Even in comedies featuring hilarious, inept boy-men totally unable to relate to women, the guy who wins the girl in the end does so not with looks, not with style, not with money – but with the transformational ability to connect with the woman he falls for.
With love to you throughout 2010!
Like all savvy goddesses, the Love Goddess has her own site, which you can visit by clicking here.