At this point in my life success equals having three caring adult children.

This sounds hokey but i’ll own that….. I define success by the people in my life who i love and who love me back. I wake up in the morning and i’m loved. truly loved. it’s all i’ve ever wanted in life really.

My definition of success has changed through the years, but one thing remains the same.  I only truthfully feel successful if I know I have acted morally.  If I do what I know is correct, then I can move on.  The frosting is everything else: including recognition.  And at the end of the day, my daughter and my dog don’t care if I make a million dollars or nothing: they just care that I love them and that is the ultimate success.

I am proud of a lot of abilities and accomplishments but those are blips in time. As Jackie Kennedy said ‘If you bungle raising your children anything eles you do really doesn’t matter.’ The most successful thing I ever did, or will do, is to have become a mother at 17 to a son who inspired me decades later, and by every day of his life, to write this:

"It should be simple to say why you’d never love any of the other 6.6 billion people on the planet. As much, or the way, you love your son. It should be easy to explain this person. Who gave birth to you as much as you channeled him here. But it isn’t simple, or easy. Primal loves go to the center of the universe, and the edges of it too, and contain, in their unique way, all there is. They are a bond that will not diminish in time, because they are a distinct spiritual force in time. Standing on their own, and together, like the four physics forces.

I could speak about his physical enchantments, and recite his achievements, virtues, and gifts. Or say that when he entered a room, at two, or four, or six, or sixteen, or twenty-six that the quality of air and light and time and conceptions of that hour, and all potentialities, changed too.

I could show the photos and letters of a lifetime; laugh and cry at those million moments of fun, and adventure, and sorrow, and daring. And express pride that his life has been one continuous act of selfless courage, charm, and caring. But to say too much would intrude on a discrete and other-oriented man.

When we speak the world runs away. When we are together there is some kind of magical everything, in a bubble, all contained right there. If we walk on the beach and say nothing, it doesn’t matter, because everything is in his just being there.

Uni-verse means one unifying song. Its nature is essentially creativity and grace, with everything at once mirroring and containing its other side. My essential nature is creative. His is grace. Beyond eternity my first blessing is my Son." 

I consider myself a very successful person. Although I am now retired, I had a wonderful career in which I broke down barriers of discrimination in hiring for men and women of all ages and races at a time when this was almost an impossible thing to do. I even received recognition from the federal government for my accomplishments. My work enabled me to change and improve the lives and status of many.

However, I consider my greatest accomplishment was the rearing of my three sons. (two mine, one step)  I brought my sons up practically alone with little help financially or otherwise. They turned out to be wonderful, giving human beings. They are not only successful in their work, but are fabulous, caring fathers and husbands and  very devoted to me. No one could ask for more.