I can so relate, Jane…as posted elsewhere, I don’t lend but certainly give without expectation until it comes to me.  Family and friends know that there is something of a hermit about me and yet, for the most part, I’m happy with that.  I’m happy in my own self and company…and for most of my life it’s seemed that I not only like it but need it.  And if my physical presence is required, not a problem but I’m always happy to get back to my own space.  I used to think it a flaw but I’m not sure it is…I don’t think it is so easy to get to a place where one is content, "un"-bored in one’s own company and learn to say "I’m sorry…but no…" but if we do it right and with compassion…including with ourself…it can be healthier.      

Never having had much in the way of money or possessions, I nonetheless give of my time, energy, my caring…to a point. I love what Jane says about people not always knowing how deeply she cares…  I’m one of those extroverted introverts who appear at ease with people in crowds or certain social situations, but have a hard time getting close, and don’t always let people know that I think of them, and that I care.

As to the question itself…certain possessions, (books, particularly) I’ve learned never to lend, even to folks I love and trust. Other things, I  give freely. (Although the shirt off my back was usually 4 sizes too big for everyone else…) Now that I have nieces and a nephew, I find myself wanting to share knowledge — of family, of nature…handy things I’ve learned along the way. 

Jane, Nancy and Kate I can relate. There is nothing like being able to share time with those you love, admire and respect. I’ve always enjoyed sharing and exchanging information. I give tons of books away. I love books and my library is full of them. The more I give away the more come to visit and stay.

I am my own best company. I learned at an early age to appreciate my company. I enjoy my home and my solitude. I also enjoy being around others. I have no problem in sharing myself. I’m learning more how to share me with me.

I do not like being in the company of others who like to speak negatively about others and complain constantly. Some people like to drag you into their discontent and misery. I stay clear of them once learning what they’re about. For some people life is just one big cloud. I’m not speaking of persons with health issues. I’m speaking of persons who are mean for no reason.

For all the introverts ,I’m certain those who love you know you love them.

Dear Ms. Jane:  How good to hear from you once again!!  I, too have no problems sharing possessions with my family and friends.  Cats don’t need a lot of "things" and I am happy to be generous. But I have to admit I find it a little harder to share my food—especially when Monkey, my neighbor kitty, comes along and eats.  But I also know I can go to her house and get a meal. so it balances out.   I must admit that I am kinda shy when it comes to strangers.  All I need is a little time to warm up and once I have, you’re my friend forever.  Then I can give of myself and that really makes me very happy.  I’ll alwalys thank you for giving me my name. And I think your creativity illustrates the generosity of your spirit.  Love, Dice the Nice

 

Hi Jane,  like you, I don’t hesitate to help a friend or family member in need or when they are in distress. Even though money for us is very, very tight, we still help others out financially (i.e. paying bills and groceries etc) - Carrie and I both, place ourselves on the back-burners for those in need quite often. 

As a couple (and even as a individuals), we both have trouble buying stuff for ourselves.  Even when every now and then we have a few extra coins in the bank, we still don’t rush out and spend it all, we only buy things we need, not so much want.  And there rest is spent on bills. However, we do appreciate everything we do own and possess.

I know exactly what it if feels like to be introvert and be a bit reclusive too. My partner Carrie is truly an extrovert which makes us direct opposites.

For me as an introvert, I think the reason for is to basically recharge myself and my spirit. Some may think this is a very self-fish thing to do (spend a lot of  time with yourself) but in reality its an ability to restart and refresh your mind and spirit so that you can really feel present when you are engaged in social activity.

Another reason is, for me as an artist, I’m easily inspired by something new and my imagination starts rolling. Sometimes, I need my down time to collect all my ideas and concepts without distraction. If do become distracted, I could loose that concentration of thought and then may never get back to finish what I was trying to create. For this reason alone, I used to stay up to 2 to 3 am in the morning to do my art  so that I would not get distracted as much as I would during the day.

In being nice, you have to be careful because there are a lot of dishonesty and generic-fake beings out there that love to take on a good saint, and by being "too nice"  these clowns will take advantage of you and your generosity thus making you feel like a fool and a bit robbed too (not to mention "used").  Carrie and I both have gotten burned many times and then some. So, it makes sense that we are careful on who we make friends with and even with family, got to be careful and smart!

Anyway, we still give to others and we’re very proud of it actually.  We do need more generous people out there. It really does make a difference. A little bit, does go a long way. Thanks for the post Jane - Shey

Oh, Ms. Jane…

Hi, Jane :)

I Miss Seeing You ! Your comment speaks Volume !

You Do have a Generous Spirit & Heart ! As the ole saying goes:

Only woman we have to Please, is one in the mirror.  Jane, You have a unique point of view: Loving Your Authenticity

Here is Your quote: A sobering thought: what if, right at this moment, I am living up to my full potential?

Jane Wagner quote is from, Simple Abundance  A Daybook of Comfort

and Joy —-February 13th. page

 Peace & Hugs,

Regina McGrath Palm Desert, Ca

 

Jane, I can’t relate with your confliction in this regard, in terms of being giving of oneself. I give of myself too much. But my conflict is not knowing and realizing (I’ll never know for sure)….did I give enough?

•  Did I say all the things to all the people that should have been said?
• Did someone need a hug and were they silently wishfully needing me to embrace them in moments when I simply smiled and walked away?
• Did I walk away from a friendship and friend who may have really needed me?

I give my time, I listen and give advice, I do favors and am basically a good person, but is it enough. If I die tomorrow will I have left all of this and more undone? 

Dear Jane,

I have never thought of you in any other way than as open and generous.  You are a beautiful soul.

Miss Jane… I agree with Serena! You are a lovely soul!

One thing, Ms. Jane, I would like to say, and that is with your wonderful creativity, vibrant intelligence and material resources, there will never be a sell-by date in terms of your opportunity to grow and change to achieve the goals you set for yourself.  So the important thing, I think, is never to believe any part of yourself is "cast in stone," and never to accept those things that make you feel bad about yourself as irretrievable.  Just ain’t so, McGee.  (I now descend the podium, with love, …)

Oh, P.S., if you need someone to practice these things on, I’m here!

I think you have a wonderful energy about you, and whether you realize the value yourself, what you project is always giving unware. Just be you, the rest is already done.

Ms. Jane, uhm, as Mugsy suggested, you can practice on all of us by talking with us again.

If I make a really sad face, will that work?  :o(

I will try to purr you back….here goes purrrrrrrrrr