My number one stressor these days is trying to get into grad school! I’m starting the apps now and though I love all the programs I’m applying to, each time I sit down to work on them I feel grossly inadequate!!

Caitlin stressfully writes, “My number one stressor these days is trying to get into grad school…I feel grossly inadequate!” Wait! Wait a minute there, Caitlin. You are certainly not inadequate. You have completed your undergraduate course of study. This is a big accomplishment, the hardest accomplishment of college. Quite impossible for you to be inadequate. You are now amongst the minority of Americans who have earned an undergraduate degree, about one-third of Americans. This is a source of pride for you and is affirmation you are successful at academics. You have earned your right to attend graduate school, you are qualified. In many ways, graduate school is a breeze. Hard work, yes, but you are no longer required to meet breadth requirements, those are behind you now. Here on in, you will enjoy study of your chosen topic, and only your topic. You will discover your professors will treat you as an equal, a junior equal. All will recognize and honor your having worked your way to this level of education. None will consider you inadequate and you are not. Welcome to academic world, Caitlin. You will do just fine. Okpulot Taha Choctaw Nation

Thanksgiving … the holidays .. they suck … what if you don’t have a family? What does that mean to a little kid like mine? Well, let me tell you what it means … A) dinner with strangers at a shelter B) thank god he has austim and is happy with what he has … the end. For me, it means no dinner to serve … at least last year we had a turkey … we were with stupidhead last year and this year he won’t have us on account were sick … so, this would be the first year at the “church” and no invitation for chanukah … the way I look, and I must say we look rather beaten. I am worried about this holiday for my little boy … the end.

What causes me the most stress recently is downsizing at work. It seems like no one has a secure job. I cannot count on having a job next year, this has been confirmed. I have constant trouble sleeping. I have always lived within my means. I expected more from life by my age. I expected to be able to sleep, at the very least. I hear horror stories about thousands laid off all over the city—what will they do? There are no jobs. I hate my job, but at least I have one, for now. It’s 4 AM, time to toss and turn.

Being a single mother of limited means, who has to commute more than 40 miles in DC area to make ends meet. I want to work closer to home to be near my two children-one teenager & a 20-year old! I feel so cheated out of being the mother and parent that I want to be. Thank goodness I have two of the best well-behaved and the nicest children a parent could ask for. No problems at all (although I will never say never).

Trying to keep as many people around me happy and upbeat in these depressing the stressful times. I’m surrounded by people who are losing jobs they have had for decades. Jobs that paid for lifestyle most of us could only dream of. They are down, withdrawn and I am spending so much energy counseling them to keep them positive I feel I’m being drained in the process.

During challenging economic times, couples are under a lot more pressure than usual- relationships aren’t easy to begin with, but under financial duress, it’s even more critical to demonstrate patience and compassion. Conflict Resolution Tips for Couples: • If your significant other does or says something upsetting, don’t take immediate offense. Ignore the topic briefly, about 15 – 20 minutes, longer if necessary. Do something else to distract yourself. Work, read, exercise, watch TV or listen to music. If the issue still bothers you, talk to your partner. Most of the time, what ticked you off becomes a non-issue after you’ve taken a break. • Eliminate distractions when talking about conflicts. Turn off the TV or music and don’t accept calls. Avoid bringing up problems late at night, attention span may be dead for the evening. • Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus said it first: Men want a quick fix, while women sometimes just want to be heard. Remind him about what you need with the following preface: “I know it may be tough for you, but I want you just to listen. Don’t try to fix anything, just hear what I have to say. I’ll feel much better afterwards.” • Timing is crucial. If you or your significant other is dealing with disappointments at work, or hosting a dreaded family member from out of town, or under an exceptional amount of stress, it’s probably not a suitable time to bust chops about poor communication skills. Wait until equilibrium returns or the dust settles. • Allow each other space before and after work. Don’t expect (or your signficant other to rush back from work to sort out a conflict that began that morning. Take some time to unwind and relax before you resume the discussion. If you return home hungry, eat first. Low blood sugar is bad for conflict resolution. • Conflicts should be raised and resolved in private within the confines of your home. If they get aired in public, you risk embarrassing your partner or being humiliated yourself. Visit www.DitchingMrWrong.com for more tips…

The increase of violent crime by adolescents is very disturbing. It is as if they feel entitled to do so and have no remorse. Our communities are stressed by the rash of recent robberies. If someone were to do a study, I’d say alcohol consumption is on the increase. People are depressed and doing desperate things.