Mr. wOw’s Current Events Mash-Up

Rick Santorum, Pat Buchanan, Linsanity , Whitney and Chris Christie: our inimitable columnist weighs in

If I were a woman, I’d be scared out of my mind right now. So scared I’d be doing everything in my power to organize, coalesce, fight like hell to prevent Rick Santorum from getting any closer to snatching the Republican candidacy for president from the weak hands of Mitt Romney.

Mr. Santorum is, to put it plainly, a religious maniac, who essentially wants to kill and punish women. He does not believe in a woman’s right to choose, he does not believe women should use contraception, he does not want women to have ultra-sound examinations. (Rick thinks this leads to more abortions, because women — and their husbands — might not want to bring a damaged child into the world.) He’d prefer to see women stay home and tend to their many, many children. He talks a lot about Satan.

Even the staunchest anti-Obama Republican woman should be terrified of Santorum. He is dangerous. What makes him even more dangerous is that he is quite personable-looking. Handsome, even. Youthful and boyish. Why, a guy who looks like that — all sweater-vested and clean-cut — that guy couldn’t be a potential emperor of an American theocracy, ruling a country based on the mythologies of the Bible? In fact, he is perfect for role. “Anatomy is destiny” said Sigmund Freud. Mr. Santorum’s anatomy is deceptively pleasing, his terrible words delivered in soothing, “I’m just being reasonable” tones.

And please don’t say, “He could never win, if he ran against Obama.” Because you know what, so many people — including me! — said, “America will never elect a man of color with the name Barack Obama to the White House.” Well, now Barack Obama is facing a brutal battle to secure his second term as president. Anything can happen. Anything is possible. Don’t be cavalier, don’t relax your guard. Women of America, defend yourselves.

Yeah, Santorum hates the gays too. But you can hide being gay, if it came to that. You can’t hide being a woman. I know this is extreme rhetoric. I intend it to be extreme. I am shouting “Fire” in a room crowded with women. Because there is smoke on the horizon.


On to Pat Buchanan, who was recently fired from his role as a commentator on MSNBC’s acclaimed political talk show, “Morning Joe.” I don’t agree with Pat Buchanan. Certainly not on his scary visions about the “browning” of America, or his thoughts on the Jews during World War II, or gays. However, I always found him engaging, intelligent, sometimes even correct on certain policy issues. He made me think, even if I was sure he was incorrect. He generally had a good sense of humor, even when he was being attacked. I looked forward to his opinions on the current political scene. He was a staple on MSNBC for years. In fact, Rachel Maddow owes at least some of her current success to her feisty debates with Pat, back in the day, a few years ago. (Before she got her own show.) Both acquitted themselves admirably, with respect for their differences.

Now, after months on suspension, Pat Buchanan has been kicked to the curb. Why? Because he wrote a book in which he expressed opinions he’s been expressing for years. Specifically — why he thinks it will not be a good thing when whites are no longer the majority race in the U.S. That’s what Pat thinks. It’s what he’s always thought. I’ve heard him speak of it. But suddenly he is ousted from MSNBC, who behave as if he was masquerading as a liberal all this time.

What a crock. I am so tired of people being fired and censured and forced to apologize for everything they say. Especially when what they say has never been any kind of secret. MSNBC is now awash in liberalism. That might be okay, sorta, if all the liberals were smart. But we are forced to watch a loud ignoramus like Ed Shultz, or a creature like Al Sharpton, who is nothing but a race-baiting, rabble rousing fool — Tawana Brawley, Tawana Brawley, Tawana Brawley. No, as a native New Yorker I will never forget what Sharpton did to my city.

Now Pat Buchanan has fled to Fox to air his grievances. Which is too bad, because Fox didn’t much like him prior to his MSNBC firing. He’ll be encouraged to do his worst.

As for MSNBC, I am Pontius Pilate — I’ve washed my hands. I will continue to watch, mostly for Miss Maddow, despite her periodic attacks of the cutes. But there’s nothing to truly engage me — no conflict, no dissenting views, no nothin’.


Which leads me, inevitably, to Jeremy Lin. The first time I saw a headline that proclaimed “Linsanity!” I thought — “Oh, god, what has Lindsay done now?”

Soon, I learned it was all about this really cute Asian basketball player. I’m not a basketball fan. I prefer soccer. Still, he’s cute! I was on board. Then came the unfortunate ESPN headline when his team lost — “Chink In the Armor?” The writer apologized. Once, twice, three times — but he’s out of a job. The ESPN anchor who repeated the phrase was suspended for thirty days. His wife is Asian. Those involved say this well-used expression — “chink in the armor” — was not intended as a racial slur. I myself find it hard to believe it was, in this era of instantaneous examination. Idiotic, for sure, but deliberately confrontational and racist? I doubt it.

Still, a job was lost. A job. A paying-bills- job. A supporting- your-family job.

Offended by something? Protest. Get an apology (for all that means to people who are truly bigoted.) But don’t scream for blood and guts and the ruin of a career. It won’t help. Attitudes won’t be changed. “You’ve got to be carefully taught,” as the song from “South Pacific” goes. And hate is carefully taught in every way and every day. Those who are fired hate even more. And if they didn’t hate to begin with, time on the unemployment line is a festering swamp.


Whitney Houston’s funeral. Too much. For me. But God bless those who wanted to see her off in fine style. She was a great singer.

However: New Jersey governor Chris Chrstie lowering the state flag for Newark-born Whitney? Really? Let me get this straight. A privileged, enormously talented person who destroyed the last 15 years of her life with drugs receives the honor of a flag at half staff. But law-abiding, non-drug-taking, simple homosexual men and women are not allowed to marry in Chris Christie’s New Jersey.

I live in Hoboken. I knew I’d missed something. The crack pipe. Let me ruin my little talent on drugs. First I’ll get the flag, then I’ll get the vows. Right?


And last but not least: in my previous column I mentioned I hadn’t been feeling well — a lingering cold and cough had begun to worry me. I went to my doctor, who ordered some tests. So here are the results: I am in perfect health. I have a slight vitamin D deficiency. Otherwise, all is well. My X-rays revealed nothing unusual happening in my chest. Even my liver and kidneys were perfect — which I found surprising, considering my margarita intake! (Although I have promised myself — and B. — to cut back a bit.)

I was touched, however, by all the concern expressed. I love you guys!

60 comments so far.

  1. avatar JCF4612 says:

    Rick Santorum truly is a piece of work. It’s a sad commentary on America (certainly on the GOP) that he’s considered a frontrunner toward becoming the Republican nominee for the highest office in the land. Lawdy, Ms. Clawdy, get the girls together and start mobilizing against this neanderthal.  

    • avatar JCF4612 says:

      Oh, and Mr. Wow, so glad to know your liver, etc. are in prime condition. They’ll need strength to get through the November election.

      • avatar Mr. Wow says:

        Dear JCF…

        Part of me wants to experience every terrible moment of the coming campaign.  The other part wants to go into a coma until it is all over. 

  2. avatar Pdr de says:

    Excellent article, Mr. Wow! I moved from Wisconsin to escape the long, difficult winters, but mostly to escape Gov. Walker, to Virginia, where as Lila said and this is a direct quote from her letter “the Republican-majority Virginia state legislature, which tried to pass a law which, by the way it was written, would basically require women getting very early-term abortions to first have a “transvaginal ultrasound.” This is where an ultrasound probe is shoved up your hoo-ha and wiggled around for a good 30-45 minutes so that the doctor can then force the woman to view what she intends to abort. Calculated harassment, bullying, and shaming in my book, and many called it “state sanctioned rape.” Now the Governor and the (female!) sponsor of the bill are killing it in its current form, faced as they are with the ridicule and outrage of the entire country.” No matter where I go I seem to be surrounded by what I refer to as “Rabid” Republicans (Tea Party sounds much to weak to describe the extremes to which these people go)!

    If they have their way, we will be taking HUGE steps back in this country, perhaps even to the time when women couldn’t vote. Santorum is a scary, scary man! There’s so much dishonesty going on in our government. The electoral vote system should have been flushed down the toilet decades ago. We don’t elect presidents – there’s the popular vote and the electoral vote – that’s why only millionaires can afford to run for president. They have to pay off so many people in order to get elected. I hate what’s going on.

    Your writing is succinct and very expressive – I love it when you reach the perking point and let it all hang out. I’m sick of politicians, dishonesty, wheeling and dealing, prejudice against people of color and homosexuals and women. Santorum as president? God help us!

    I’m so glad you’re healthier than you thought you were. Hope you feel all well soon!

  3. avatar ann penn says:

    Thank you Mr. Wow for pointing out just how serious the threat to a woman’s control over her basic self – body, mind and spirit – has become. I am one who has been fighting this battle since before Roe v. Wade. I have seen women go to the back alley, be refused the right to abort a rape pregnancy until she paid a psych dr. to lie for her (about being suicidal). Personally, I have had a life threatening (though planned, wanted) pregnancy that could not be treated until my health had reached the dire level, because I had to be dying (or close to it).

    Interesting that Mrs. Santorum lived with an abortionist Dr. before linking up with Mr. S. And that Mr. S. was pro-choice before he decided to go into politics.

    This whole “freedom of religion” flap over birth control has, IMO, reversed the positions of those who should have the “freedom”. Let the Bishops of Rome preach whatever, and then let the people decide. Do NOT take away choices that have serious life and health consequences because YOU disprove of something YOU will never need – especially from those whose religion differs from yours!

    Off the soapbox now… but my dander has been up for quite a while.

  4. avatar Tee Zee says:

    I toast to your continued good health with my bloody mary! Hope you get your login issue resolved in time!

  5. avatar Mr. Wow says:

    Tonight’s the night.  We’ll see if Satan rules and Santorum can win Michigan.