Mr. wOw: OH, Did You Really Think You Were Going to Rid of Me?

Our beloved columnist prepares for new horizons

To all of you wonderful people out there in cyberspace — paraphrasing Norma Desmond — I’m still here. And I don’t mean to make that sound like a threat!

The wOw site might be tightening up, but I’m just getting started. I know that sounds awfully confident — but those who know me know that’s just a pose. I’m actually floundering right now. After almost 30 years I’ve been laid off my job. Mr. wOw contemplates the unemployment line or a Chilean mine. There’s little money in the bank. He has not been wise, ever.

But this experience, with wOw and all of you, has given me more a sense of myself than I’ve ever had. And despite my insecurities and lack of motivation, I don’t intend to lose you. When I learned wOw was changing, I wondered where that would leave me? (It happened, coincidentlally, just as my long-term job was kinda vanishing. I’ll explain the “kinda” at another time.)

Everybody said — “Start your own blog!” But doing things entirely on my own, for myself is a foreign concept. I’ve always been the guy behind the curtain. (Either the Wizard of Oz or Polonious, neither of whom is especially admirable.) So, as the old story goes about Tallulah Bankhead — I dropped an egg and stood aside. Helpless. Luckily, I have B. He read up about everything blog-wise. He looked at themes. He wanted to find the most powerful Internet connection on which to have a blog. He kept at me. I said, “This will never happen. I need structure. I need a reason. Don’t make me explain and say bad things about myself.”

He said: “You have structure. You have a reason. Don’t you want to keep up with the people who know you on wOw? Hasn’t this meant something to you?”

I said, “It has. But I have no talent. I am nothing.”

And he said: “Here, do you like the layout of this blog?” He knows me well. And it’s best to ignore me at my worst. In B.’s case, that means ignoring most of what I say — 24/7.

Starting in the beginning of April, you can find Mr. wOw at MrwOwblog.com. I will be unchanged. Fast and loose with my thoughts, grammar and punctuation. (Somebody once asked me, “How would you describe your writing style?” I said: “Dashes, italics, exclamation points, and mistakes.”)

I will remain anonymous. Although I might finally publish a photo. You won’t know me. Maybe something with the Christmas tree or a cat. My ridiculous tuxedo avatar will remain.

I am at sea. I don’t have a paddle. I can’t find land. I am trusting you all to help me survive. Think about B., even if you don’t care much for me. He’s tired! And so smart. I always think he’s mistaken me for another Mr. wOw — the competent one, in a parallel universe.

Love you all, talk to you soon –

Mr. wOw

P.S. Thanks to Joni Evans and her band of stalwart editors (Hilary Black, Emily Gallagher, and Sylvia Marino) who allowed me my place as the male voice on a women’s site.  I’ve been honored.

71 comments so far.

  1. avatar flyonthewall says:

    Sorry to hear about your job loss, Mr. Wow and the demise of wowOwow, but I am glad to hear that you have the new blog and aren’t abandoning us. I enjoy reading your pieces and would miss you terribly if you were to go away. Best wishes to you and your new endeavor.

  2. avatar JCF4612 says:

    Oh, wow, Mr. Wow. I’d missed the “Listen Up” directive from on high, and had no idea of change in the wind until your column. I don’t do subscription radio, and doubt that route is going be a winner among a flock that likes to chew on print products. But I’ll be delighted to follow you elsewhere via blog — to the moon and back as they say. So revv up. We’re with you.    

    • avatar Mr. Wow says:

      Dear Jean Smith…Hmmmm, why do I doubt you are “unsophisticated?” 

      Please keep up  with me.  I need to know when I cross the pretentious line.  I  think I’m too insecure to be pretentious.  But that in itself might  be pretension. 

      Thanks for your good thoughts!  

  3. avatar central coast cabin home says:

    You have always been a fave of mine. I find your style very comfortable and cozy, like I know you. Initially I thought you were joking, April 1st thing and, all then I went to your site. Good luck and thank you “B” for prodding and convincing Mr. WoW!

  4. avatar mary burdt says:

    I am so sorry for your job loss, but I think it just might be the change you need (kick in the ass) to move onward and upward. I think your lost job was actually contributing to your health problems; all of them.
    I will follow you wherever you go because you have become a friend. And, I don’t want to miss out on the train trip either.
    Here’s hoping I can get connected to your blog, computer literate, I am not.
    All of your WoW fans will continue suppporting you. You are the best. Say hi to B.

  5. avatar Obediah Fults says:

    I’m still waiting for my password, Mr. wOw.

  6. avatar Chandara Sun says:

    Thrilled to bits that Mr. wOw will continue to be accessible – now now, no pressure. Post when you want & we’ll try not to be greedy for constant updates ;-)

  7. avatar Jane H says:

    May I come too if I promise not to make any ‘my gays’ gaffes? And if I do unintentionally say something politically incorrect will you forgive?

    • avatar Mr. Wow says:

      Dear Jane…

      I hate it when Kathy Griffin does it, so cynically.   

      Otherwise–I’m your gay.

      I loathe political correctness.     Which will probably get my ass sued.   

  8. avatar Vintagemom says:

    Mr. Wow, I’m so sorry about your job, but I’m elated that we will continue to hear your opinions and how you’re doing via the new blog B set up for you.  Let your words flow because I’ll be looking forward to reading them.  Love you!  Your blog site is wonderful and I’ve registered but have not yet received my password.  And I am checking my spam folder too.

  9. avatar Baby Snooks says:

    Hmmmmmmm.  Maybe I’ll join under my real name and see how long it takes everyone to realize who I am. On second thought….

  10. avatar Briana Baran says:

    Mr. Wow:

    I just found this…I don’t check WoW every day and it wasn’t until I picked up on another reader’s comment that I realized that you had written. I am so proud of you, so delighted that you have struck out on your own. I know how hard it is to lose your job…and I am terrible with finances…but you have B., and you have people out here in the ether who do love you too, and think that you’re special…regardless of what you feel about yourself.

    I will be going to your new site…I can’t tell you just how pleased I am. I am trying to find the nerve to actually post something on my blog…seriously fearful beast that I am…but Rusty is encouraging and gently pushing at me and I have plenty of time…it’s all of the “I really have nothing much to offer, who do I think I am” coming out all over again. If you ever care to visit (please me a chance to get one of my “rants” together) the address is:

    filthyworms.blogspot.com

    Come see in a few days. Maybe I’ll have something to say that actually makes sense.

    I love you Mr. Wow (o lordy, don’t take that the wrong way, I’m no stalker) and respect you, and if you’re defective or sometimes lost…well, we’re fellow travelers and I truly do understand.

    In hope, peace and a certain defiance

    bb

    • avatar Mr. Wow says:

      Dear Briana…

      We are all travelers.  I wish I could be more defiant and less defective!  Post on your blog.  You have plenty to say and you say it eloquently.    

      You are one of the many I’ve met here from whom I’ve learned a lot.   

  11. avatar Helen Moran says:

    The only interesting writer on here is you. You are real, you are open with your thoughts and opinions and I will join you on your blog. This website cannot possibly get any more bland and boring. I find it hard to believe Whoopi Goldberg has any real input. I am also sorry to say, Liz Smith is a giant bore. For everything there is a time, I have heard, and its time for this site to go away. You, however, need to concentrate on your blog. Good Luck

  12. avatar Belinda Joy says:

    :-) My Dear Mr. Wow……

    You are in the hospital. Both legs, arms and torso in casts. One eye has a patch, you are immobilized. Your hearing is diminishing, all your teeth have been extracted, you have a rash that covers your entire body. You’ve just been told you are now homeless, you have no health insurance and your cat was hit by a car.

    I walk in the room and lean over you as you lay in the hospital bed and say “Well, at least your right eye still looks beautiful…..”    :-)
        
    I say that because the first thing that comes to mind in reading of your departure is, everything happens for a reason. I know, I know, its of little consequence.  But it is true.

    I can remember your very first article on wowOwow. I was suspicious of what you would have to offer us. Especially at that time when the make up of the women that blogged here was dramatically different than the women that blog here today. We were a force to be reckoned with! :-O  I think some of us thought we would chew you up and spit you out. But you proved you could give as much as we dished out. You were a hit with everyone right out the gate!

    I have registered with your new blog site and will follow you there. To be honest, the conversations that take place may be more interesting to follow there, given they will be far more unfettered.

    So this isn’t goodbye, this is see you soon friend…..

    xoxo
    Belinda