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Margo Howard | 07/01/2009 8:25 am

Whatever Happened to Discretion?

Margo Howard unleashes on disgraced governor Mark Sanford — and goes into ‘Dear Margo’ mode to provide the South Carolina politician with some advice.
Margo Howard

Editor’s Note: A longtime journalist, Margo Howard went into the family business (her mother was the fabled Ann Landers) in the 1990s as Dear Prudence. Her broad experience and understanding of human nature provide answers for the troubled — and entertainment for everyone else. Margo’s advice column, Dear Margo, appears twice a week — on Thursdays and Fridays — on wowOwow.com.

What’s up with Gov. Mark Sanford? I cannot remember another public confession so loaded with detail. It’s as though he were a "sinner" looking for forgiveness, and we are Oprah. Sanford is making John Edwards’s stonewalling look positively admirable. (You know … it was only one night and the baby isn’t his.)

I heard a reporter from South Carolina saying on NPR that the governor apparently “wanted to talk." I’ll say. We learned the Argentinean bombshell was his "soul mate," that he "had crossed the line before" — but "not the sex line" — on trips out of  the country to unwind with the boys. He went public with this tidbit: "This was a whole lot more than a simple affair. This was a love story."

However … let’s hear it for the little woman. Three cheers for Jenny Sanford who threw him out. How refreshing to see a political wife act like a woman instead of some humiliated helpmate who is often trying to save a political career. No Silda or Hillary she, in effect saying to the public: "If I don’t care, why should you?"

I am trying really hard not to entertain feelings of schadenfreude about love-struck dude being yet another one in a long conga line of Republican moralists who are caught with, well, their pants down. I am frankly embarrassed for the guy. How much more dignified to have sought out a therapist if he had the need to spill? In one of his confessionals he said he had blown up his career, his marriage and the lives of his children. So: what next? Putting on my advice columnist hat I would recommend that he move to Argentina to be with Chapur and become a gaucho, or something. And also that he sit down and shut up.

513 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

deber B

Well, Margo, as you pointed out that Sanford is "another one in a long conga line of Republican moralists who are caught with, well, their pants down" I just wanted to add to that I truly feel your pain….republicans were disgusted with President Clinton’s affairs and his lies…I mean, lying to the Grand Jury is a bit much, don’t you think?   Cheating husbands spares no political party.

I agree with you that Sanford talks too much.   I cringe when people give out too much personal information.   I believe "answering" the question should be "to the point."   Should Sanford move to Argentina?  I really don’t care where he moves or if he moves at all but he really needs to resign and move away from center stage and, yes, keep his private life to himself.    If his Argentina love affair is "for real" then they will find a way to be together.   However, at the moment, he needs to be thinking hard about alimony and child support payments.   Whatever is left over he can share with his "soul mate."  

Go Jenny Go!

By deber B on 07/01/2009 8:41 am
DeBúrca obj
Clinton did his job and didn’t moralize, that is why he left office with a 65% approval rating.
By DeBúrca obj on 07/01/2009 8:47 am
deber B
A cheater is a cheater but it’s worse when you get caught in a lie.   Sanford isn’t lying and he isn’t the President of the United States.   Jenny walks away with dignity.   Hillary "stood by her man" because it was in her best interest politically.
By deber B on 07/01/2009 8:52 am
F P
Uh Deber he did to lie about the others and the number of times he spent with his girlfriend. 
By F P on 07/01/2009 9:00 am
deber B

True, he did lie initially but came "clean."   How refreshing.

By deber B on 07/01/2009 9:06 am
DeBúrca obj
Oh, so now it is "our cheated on wife is better than your cheated on wife" ? Is that what this is coming down to with the Republicans? Face it, the moralistic, holier than thou, theocracy platform isn’t working for you guys. And, did I mention, Clinton left office with a 65% approval rating?
By DeBúrca obj on 07/01/2009 9:04 am
deber B

Please, Deburca, I would like to remind you that there was no "real" surplus during the Clinton administration. During those years, Social Security ran a surplus that was then loaned to the federal government in order to balance the budget. In return, Social Security received IOUs. These IOUs need to be paid back just like any other form of government debt. It can hardly be said, then, that there was a surplus. The debt was simply hidden by rhetoric and propaganda.

His approval rating was directly related to his "bogus surplus" not because anyone thought he was an honorable man and husband.   In fact, he was disgusting in his daliances.  And, he wasn’t alone….John Edwards, Jack Kennedy….so please don’t point your finger at the republican in the hot box today because no matter which party one is affiliated with can produce their share of unfaithful husbands…both heterosexual and homosexual.

Geez….

By deber B on 07/01/2009 9:12 am
Libra Lady

Deber…while clinton diddled…this is what happened to Our Country!!!

http://dir.salon.com/story/politics/feature/2002/01/09/clinton/index.html

By Libra Lady on 07/01/2009 9:38 am
Tina Walden
deber B, you are incorrect about the surplus.  Social Security had a 300 million dollar surplus when Clinton left office.  One of the first things Pres. Bush did was tap the surplus for the budget for special projects.  He gave them IOU’s not Clinton.
By Tina Walden on 07/01/2009 8:43 pm
Community Manager
To the above commenters, let’s stay on-topic of the discussion which is discretion and not balancing the budget.
By Community Manager on 07/01/2009 10:38 pm
MK P
Sanford essentially abandoned not only his wife, but his state and his constituents by deciding to be "incognito" in Argentina — he left no one in charge should an emergency arise, no back up plan.    There’s no comparing what he did with either Clinton or Kennedy.
By MK P on 07/02/2009 7:59 am
deber B
We are talking about "husbands who cheat" and I believe Clinton and Kennedy fit in nicely.
By deber B on 07/02/2009 8:26 am
MK P

Hmmmmmm……..I think the topic is "politicians who cheat" — Sanford chose to cheat on his constituents.  Also, I don’t recall Kennedy or Clinton going on national tv, crying, declaring that they were going to try to "fall back in love" with their wives (translation, I am publicly declaring I no longer love my wife and the mother of our children).  

As usual, no comparison.

By MK P on 07/02/2009 8:41 am
deber B

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….maybe Sanford should have a public caning?  Republicans cannot take responsibility for the way Sanford is behaving….sorry, MK P, that’s his personal problem not the party’s problem.  If he wants to strip naked before his constituents, it would have nothing to do with "other" republicans.   It’s his deal….all his.

 

By deber B on 07/02/2009 8:52 am
MK P

Hmmmmmmm………maybe Republicans should just stop beating the moralist drum while telling everyone else how to live their lives……..then it wouldn’t be such big news when one of them actually demonstrates they are actually human and they wouldn’t be the party of hypocrits.

What do you think would have happened had South Carolina actually had an emergency while Sanford was "dallying"?

By MK P on 07/02/2009 8:59 am