men repulsed, well, on st. pete beach, you see women, 55’sto65’s who seem quite alive. my last ‘snook-hunt’——big surf from Ike—-perfect ‘get-giant-snook’ conditions—-skunked—-but the sea was spectacular—-a charming lady, older, i’m no kid—-yet with amazing charm watched the sea churn—-i told her to stay alert—-i had been ‘blitzed’ by a wave from the East-she smiled, at as close may wish at sea’s monstrous-rushing Gulf—-she emitted child-like glee—-it is awesome to stand on a rock-pile, usually feet-away, and see the entire Gulf rush by at 6 knots+—-now at ‘jetty-top’—-i saw it coming, put down my gear, saying, ‘lady, Now, take my hand and this rope.’ the wave simply crashed, as none before—-we were soaked—-but not washed to sea—-i shouted, ‘Posiodon’ you mutha—-Zeus will have payback’. this lady laughed, we both did—-she said, ‘shower time.’ should i have asked for same? e-mail address? could a younger woman ever offer what time provides? i’m the ‘faithful-fool’ type—-i’ll keep fishing, i release, perhaps a second chance? ‘don’t stop thinking about tomorrow’——

i did not answer your question—-if the older woman has her area of power? that threatens many men—-don’t forget men are fragile as you—-‘no more ‘broken hearts”, a sane rule—-learned the hard way—-over time—-so they worry on ‘lost-power’—-an old friend saved, then directed to fortune a younger man—- look at ‘The Ozz’—-older wife made him——do i need to say ‘Ben-Frank’?

And you are “an exceptional, singular” woman, Candice. I am a huge fan of yours!!

Hi Candace I’m Michael from Australia, a writer for “Living Life…Boomer Style” magazine. I’m mostly featured in the music department since that is my specialty and main passion. http://www.livinglifeboomerstyle.com/ I’m a young journalism student fresh out of university, and many of the wonderful, inspirational people we feature in our magazine are 50+. I’ve always enjoyed the company of women older than myself, and often my free periods at university were spent with some of the mature-age entry collegiates. I felt I could learn more from them than from people my own age, and in most cases, they were much nicer people than my own peers. I guess it’s because I come from a family where women are respected and treated as equals, no matter of their age, and it’s no surprise that pretty much all of the women I’ve written about in my articles are of what we call “Boomer Age”, between 40-60 roughly. I’ve written features for many of my favourite musicians, all of whom fit into the age category mentioned. For example: Bette Midler, Whoopi Goldberg, Beth Nielsen Chapman, The Go-Go’s, The Bangles (and all the individual members of those two bands), Cher, Lucy Lawless, Abby Travis (who at 39 is the youngest of the boomer artists I’ve covered), Dominique Davalos, Susan Cowsill, Siobhan Maher-Kennedy, Amy Grant…to name a few. I’m really not all that interested in the tennybopper or even the 20-30 age crowd, with a few exceptions like my musician friend Jon Peter Lewis, who is 29 this year. I believe women, not just musicians, over 40 are much wiser, have so much more to offer, and are a pleasure to learn from. I enjoy watching “The View”, Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar are my two favourite hosts, as was Meredith Vieira when she was on the show. In Australia, my favourite journalist is Lisa Wilkinson who is also of boomer age. Of course, there is also the legendary Murphy Brown, played by your own lovely and talented self. I always watched and admired Murphy. Cheers, Michael

Sorry I spelled your name wrong, Candice. My apologies, I just noticed I did that. Cheers, Michael

Men who are afraid of women over 50 are of no interest whatsoever.

Answer: Honestly…..excess skin, wrinkles, no brick-house abs, etc. yada, yada, yada. Maybe success, too. There’s still the double-standard with men, as much as I appreciate those men that swear it ain’t so.

I married my second husband 4 years ago. He is smart, handsome and 20 years younger than I am. Every day I am amazed by his passion and devotion to me. He is the love of my life and age has never been a factor in our beautiful relationship. I think he is more scared of younger women!

I try not to stereotype men, because most women don’t appreciate it when men stereotype us. Having said this, from my experience with men (I’m 48), so many simply don’t seem to develop out of a seemingly shallow, adolescent mentality. Even if it seems they do so on the surface, with marriages, children, etc., many still act like boys trying to obtain the prettiest girl in high school. Of course, some men have depth and are interesting beings, but they aren’t in the majority in my experience.

What a sad commentary for our society to think most men would find a woman repulsive simply because of her age, and those men who don’t are the exception rather than rule. If this notion were true, what would it say about the character of our men? I have to disagree with Candice and personally give our male population more credit. I’ve raised two grown sons and feel confident neither would entertain such ignorance or simple mindedness.

Sorry, but I think the question is a bit too simply stated. The actual “issue” is broader and more complicated. Men are getting mixed signals. Women too. There’s a “cultural” brainwashing going on that’s almost unconscious. Men-women relationships: I believe they have been gradually getting worse since the 60s. But it’s not JUST age alone. It’s also appearance and intelligence. Unfortunately, age, appearance, and intelligence are intertwined in our culture. Again, I am speaking broadly here. There are always exceptions and it’s nice to see posts here that are. But I do think they are exceptions. Our culture does not handle aging well. I do not quite understand why. Some (maybe a lot?) of it is business: the cosmetic and weight-loss industries make billions. But why? Why have we bought into this? Overall, we now place very little value on wisdom. There are few families made up of 3, much less 4, generations in the same neighborhood, much less the same house. “Seniors” segregate in “Assisted Living” communities and nursing homes. These are problems with our culture as a whole that directly impact relationships between men and women. By culture I am talking about the whole spectrum of advertising, video games (look at female avatars!), television, magazines, books, doctors, the internet, etc. While there is a niche “market” for “big beautiful intelligent women” - do you see “large” women on Bones, CSI, etc. REGULARLY portrayed as beautiful and intelligent? Under 40? No. You have to buy magazines like BBW to see them. Older women? No. Look at the statistics of older women with, say, acting careers as characters who are considered beautiful and intelligent over 50 as opposed to under 30. There aren’t many, although there are more than in the past. And I am not talking as grandmas here. Or in commercials. Parents, teachers and churches can teach that age and appearance are not the be-all and end-all to a fare-thee-well, yet outside them, pretty much all we see is that young, slender and beautiful is what matters. For BOTH men and women. Mothers have an impact, true - but are there many out there who would truly dance with delight if their son brought home a 200 lb, 5’3 bride-to-be? Even if she were witty, intelligent and his age? Or if their 28 year old son brought home a 57 year old woman? Even if she were slender, beautiful and intelligent? (Happened to a dear friend of mine: her reaction was dismay over unlikelihood of grandchildren.) Would their sons’ friends cheer them on? Peer group COUNTs. Again, there are always exceptions, but…. The double standard rears it’s ugly head when men are considered handsome and eligible even in their 70s - regardless of how they look, or what, if anything, is in between their ears. There are thousands of examples of older men with younger women. Maybe a handful of older women with younger men. Statistics again: far more men in their 50s and 60s divorce their similarly aged wives for younger women. And often start new families. So. Our culture does not encourage women to be with younger men, and men are pushed to be with younger women. Anyone see a problem here? Then there’s employment. I cannot count of the number of jobs I lost in my 20s and 30s due to weight. Just like the “dumb blonde” cliche, fat and stupid have been coupled as well. Not that an interviewer ever said anything. Illegal! But body language? Didn’t have a hope in heck in many cases. Same goes for treatment in restaurants and stores. Now, age is killing me. Older workers are being laid off because they make more. Oh, it’s well disguised in the layoff numbers. And in early retirement offers. But we are not hired elsewhere because our experience costs more. We’re also often considered slower, less energetic, and less likely to adapt to new technologies and ideas. I’ve worked at companies with the “unstated” HR policy of: replace any experienced engineer with someone fresh out of college. Didn’t matter if they couldn’t do the job of the engineer who left. So. To (finally!) end this epistle - yes, I agree men are NOT generally attracted to older women. Either personally or professionally. Have seen. Have experienced. It’s real.

I have a skeleton in my closet and never mentioned it to anyone before now. I let a near perfect man go when I was in my late 20’s because he had wrinlkly skin on his arms. I am talking pretty darn close to perfect, too. BUT, in Febuary, he is coming to visit and now I HAVE wrinkly lots of things besides arms. Will keep you posted. Laramiesundancer, 57

Gee, how strange that men prefer women under 50yrs. When a beautiful woman was 25, did she think some older, over 50 woman, was more attractive than she was? How about yourself?Did cary gramt look better at 30 or 50? Besides, it isn’t looks, intelligence, or charm, that makes people want each other. It’s some magical thing we can’t understand or control. It’s a question of what your life story is supposed to be.