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Jane Wagner | 03/12/2008 11:08 am

Confessions of a Couch Potato

Zoe Buckman

I admit it: when it comes to my remote control, I have no control. I am hopelessly addicted to the enigmatic "Brain Wave State" induced by pushing the remote power button and seeing the first image flash on. When my housekeeper has put the remote somewhere — like in the laundry — and I can’t find it, I panic just like a junkie desperate for a fix.

As time goes on, it seems I care less and less what the image is. It’s the act of watching, itself, that seems to be the endorphin releaser. I used to be so selective, so discerning about what I watched — not anymore.

I just want — need to be on the couch, watching — whatever. In fact, I almost always dial switch, in and out and round about, a special kind of addiction in and of itself. I am on the couch, but I might as well be on crack. I have this craving for TV — not for any particular shows, as I said, but for the experience of TV itself.

Along with the good feelings of escapism, this craving and the giving into it makes me feel guilty, so I almost always have a book in my lap, reading and watching TV contrapuntally — be forewarned, this also can become addictive.

Reading a book expiates the guilt of so much TV watching and I think some kind of endorphins get released from the expiation of all that guilt. This gets very tricky, but I guess I brought all this up because I’m worried that I would rather stay home and do what I’ve just described than go out to the theatre or concerts or you name it.

As you’re reading this, maybe it sounds like my life is empty, but, it’s not.

Why is it when you read a lot of books, you’re considered well-read; however, when you watch a lot of TV, you’re not well-viewed?

My life seems fulfilling — enriching even — not nearly as empty as it seems anyway. Of course, that’s helped by the fact that I have a wonderful partner who, luckily, I guess you could say, has the same addiction as I do. In fact, I think of us sometimes as the Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown of TV addiction. They kicked crack after kicking each other around a bit; however, we don’t want to kick our habit — and you have to really want to or it won’t work.

I recall that book, Amusing Ourselves to Death — but my partner and I can’t think of a better way of going.

99 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

J B
Ah, so good to find out you’re not the only one! My friends and family joke…saying if The Food Network went away…my life would be empty. They might be right…! Oh, and the laptop…even though its supposed to be mobile…it never moves beyond my big comfy “over-pillowed” bed…where I prop myself up and surf away while listening to the Goddess Paula Deen tell me how many more ways to use butter!
By J B on 03/12/2008 1:46 pm
Lori Halliburton
I’m a different type of couch potato. I designed my couch with my computer in the arm rest and on the arm rest sits my screen. I married an Aussie, and miss my family in Ohio, so I keep in touch with my kids right here! If something I like is on, I can watch tv.
By Lori Halliburton on 03/12/2008 2:15 pm
Ms. Dee
Wow! There’s a thought!
By Ms. Dee on 04/15/2008 6:24 pm
sita levy
Just saw this web on the news that I “try not to watch”. Great, great to know I am not the only one multi tasking and yet appear to be accomplishing nothing it seems. I finally stopped apologizing for not having a job and taking time out and doing NOTHING.!! Of course what woman really does nothing, especially when you are taking care of a parent, have children and have a husband about to retire!!! Never mind being the professional yenta that I am and who appears to have a sign on her forehead saying “go ahead, talk to me, share!!”. I look forward to reading more on this web. Thanks for starting it.
By sita levy on 03/12/2008 2:24 pm
Diana Marrero
I like my tv time also. My son has a tv in the den & that’s his room. We watch family shows together at times (George Lopez is a trip, but can’t seem to get into iCarly too much) but there are those days I like to be alone & hit the “last” button often. I like to watch 2 different shows @ a time (I’m not big into commercials). TV relaxes me. It’s okay to be a couch potato after a long day of selling!!
By Diana Marrero on 03/12/2008 3:04 pm
jackee wolfrey
I too share a love of television with my better half. However I find the problem not necessarily with the television watching, but more so with arguing over what to watch. He wants to watch Family Guy or the Simpson’s, and I just can’t seem to get enough of TLC and BRAVO. The only thing we really agree on is Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations! A las! At least we’re together. You know your relationship is strong when you wont chose Project Runway over your lover! :)
By jackee wolfrey on 03/12/2008 3:12 pm
CAR GAL
Okay, so maybe I shouldn’t feel so guilty. However, my TV addiction seems to be worse than most. No high flying history channel or home decorating for me…it home shopping. All those products, the voices lull me to sleep every night as the todays special blares. After a very long day working, those excited voices are like white noise with pictures.
By CAR GAL on 03/12/2008 4:15 pm
Sheryl Boyles
I love this topic. I have always been a couch potatoe, and its worse now since we got a 42” hdtv. I love hd. I’ll watch anything if its hd. I don’t feel bad about watching tv I get my work done and I learn lots of good things so what is the harm.
By Sheryl Boyles on 03/12/2008 5:04 pm
Jodi Drennan
Think you’re bad? Add TIVO and you’ll be mixing meth amphetamine to your crack high. Enjoy.
By Jodi Drennan on 03/12/2008 5:16 pm
Linda Amadeus
The people on “Law and Order” are my family. That about sums it up.
By Linda Amadeus on 03/12/2008 5:38 pm
Alice Allmon
Hello there, I lived without TV when I was a child. As an adult, I have lived on and off without TV and did so for about five years with my children. I find that if the TV comes on my girls minds simply left the room, and they are glued to the TV. I honestly feel it takes away from your family time, and I found when we sit and watch TV for about two hours my kids feel like we didn’t spend time together, and I believe that is because their minds are so engaged on the TV that they simply feel alone. My husband is a couch potato and honestly I feel is bad for him; nothing should absorbed so much of your life that you stop living. However, I do like listening to the news, I would live without TV if my husband would just let go of it.
By Alice Allmon on 03/12/2008 6:06 pm
Pam Brandow
There’s not a thing wrong with being a couch potato IF that’s what you want! I can get lost in front of the screen but since I had to downgrade my service (no money) there’s not as much to see. Sitting at the computer looking for a job is making me a computer cabbage! Clicking that nice little mouse is almost like clicking the remote!
By Pam Brandow on 03/12/2008 7:27 pm
Alexanne Stone
I’ve thought of the well-viewed and well-read analogy for years now. I’m so grateful for some of the things I learn via television. I can quickly learn about history in an hour when I would have to read for several. Between tv, computer and books…I’m definitely hooked!
By Alexanne Stone on 03/12/2008 9:15 pm
Karen Batchelor
Because I have a blog, I’ve become addicted to my laptop. Forget the remote, just give me my mouse and I’m content. I do love Extreme Makeover—Home Edition and the good cry that comes with watching that show.
By Karen Batchelor on 03/12/2008 9:53 pm
J J
Wow! What relief to learn that there are a lot of us TV addicts out there….I’m not alone! I love having it on, even if I’m not watching anything. I enjoy Style channel (Clean House….cracks me up!), HGTV and TLC channel. I also love the old movies on TCM and the indie shows on Sundance. On demand on my cable is great. I can watch newly released movies and free movies, also guilty pleasure mindless stuff. For me, it’s a great decompressor at the end of the day. As for computers, I held out getting one until a year ago. I got a laptop and am addicted to that too! lol I belong to a couple of forums (now this one…found out about this morning on GMA) , Apartment Therapy and googling. Let the good times roll….
By J J on 03/12/2008 10:37 pm