Bernard and Ruth Madoff have been man and wife for almost 50 years. They share laughs, memories, children, homes and, we’re assuming, plenty of other private tidbits. It’s fair, then, to wonder whether Ruth knew that her husband’s investment firm amounted to nothing more than a Ponzi scheme.

Prosecutors haven’t even hinted at indicting Mrs. Madoff, so there’s likely no evidence she had a hand in the alleged fraud, but some friends aren’t so certain. Donald Rosenzweig, who grew up with Ruth and invested in the family’s firm, recently took some time to shed doubt on his former play pal: “All I will say on the subject is that it’s hard to imagine that she could live with the guy for 50 years and have no inkling. Could she attract people to him? Yes. Was she out there shilling for him? I doubt it. But maybe.”

According to Mr. Madoff and his legal team, Mrs. Madoff didn’t find out until her husband confessed, which was roughly when the rest of the world found out. If that’s so, then the reality must have been crushing, as The New York Times notes, "One day, she was married to a stock-market genius, the next she was married to one of history’s great con men." Talk about a rude awakening. But then there’s the business aspect of it all — Ruth worked at her family’s foundation and helped Bernard get his career off the ground in the 1960s. Surely she would have an inside view of the nitty-gritty — and possibly erroneous — details, as some sources claim.

Not so, insists Annals of Gullibility author Stephen Greenspan. First, Ruth would have taken a good, hard look at the allegedly "cooked" books. And then there’s the cultural aspect of her role as wife: "Unless Madoff told her, why would she have any suspicion? I know plenty of wives that stay out of their husbands’ business, particularly from that generation. And all she knows is that she’s living well and everyone keeps telling her how wonderful her husband is.”

Even if Mrs. Madoff didn’t know about her hubby’s scheming, she still may have unwittingly helped him. The couple was in love, to be sure, and their intimacy provided Bernie with a sheen of respectability. Palm Springs resident and former Madoff investor Frederick Adler concurs: "Look, I’m an ex-litigator and I can usually smell a crook a mile away. But I didn’t get any odor from him, and I’m sure she helped. He’s got this pleasant, sweet wife of 30 or 40 years. Not some young chick. It somehow added to his credibility.”

With the reportedly charming and warm Ruth and her friends by his side, the more introverted Madoff had instant access to some of the world’s best social circles, and their money. If that’s the case and Ruth inadvertently helped her husband succeed — and you know we women have that effect on men — then we feel for her. There’s nothing crummier than finding out the man you love is nothing but a swindler.

Still, one thing nags us: Remember how Madoff attempted to mail jewels to relatives and friends? Do you think he, who’s under house arrest and living with his wife, could have done that undetected?