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Marlo Thomas | 06/13/2008 12:00 am

Danny Thomas to Daughter Marlo: 'Run Your Own Race, Baby'

Marlo Thomas and her dad
Marlo Thomas

Looking back, I think the most amazing thing about my father as a parent was how he included his children in his work. Most men of that era left their home and kids and went off to their jobs. Not my father. He would often take us to work at the studio with him. He let us sit in when the writers gathered for meetings in our home. He shared his passion for his work with us, and we knew he genuinely enjoyed our company.

I can still remember sitting on the floor, watching story conferences, as he and his comedy writers shaped his nightclub act or knocked around ideas for an episode for his series. Sometimes I’d laugh out loud at a joke and he’d say, “You like that?” He’d get such a kick out of my getting the joke.

My father was truly interested in his children. He wasn’t at all a “kids-are-supposed-to-be-seen-and-not-heard” kind of guy. Unusual for a powerful man.

Sometimes I’d laugh out loud at a joke and he’d say, 'You like that?' He’d get such a kick out of my getting the joke.

Growing up around all of this made my entry into the business so much easier. By the time I started working, it wasn’t a foreign land to me. I knew the lingo; I had learned how to shape a good story. And I understood the most important thing about comedy: As my father would say, “The audience will go down any yellow brick road with you, as long as you don’t lie to them. Don’t veer off that road of truth to get a laugh. Have respect for the audience, and they’ll stay with you.”

There’s a story I’ve told before about my relationship with my father that dramatizes how he influenced me and helped to shape my life:

When I was a little girl, around seven or eight, my father made a movie with Margaret O’Brien. It was summertime and he often took me to the set with him. I would cue him on his lines as we drove to MGM, with the car windows open and the heady mix of Old Spice and a Cuban cigar swirling about us. On the set I would play jacks with Margaret between takes, and when the bell rang I would join the crew in their silence as the cameras rolled and the boom mic moved into position to record the dialogue I knew by heart.

I was in awe of my father and sinfully envious of Margaret O’Brien. I wore pigtails. I wanted freckles. I wanted to be Margaret O’Brien. Ten years later, at age seventeen, I got my chance.

I played the lead in Gigi in a summer stock production at the Laguna Playhouse south of Los Angeles. The excitement of finally being a real actress was painfully short lived. All the interviews and all the reviews focused on my father. Would I be as good as Danny Thomas? Was I as gifted, as funny … would I be as popular? I was devastated.

I loved my Dad, my problem was Danny Thomas. So I went to him and said, "Daddy, please don’t be hurt when I tell you this. I want to change my name. I love you but I don’t want to be a Thomas anymore."

61 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

Diana T
You know what, Kitty? Sometimes a person wants to be a certain way so much and they talk themselves into it so much that they start believing it. No more kleinbaiting; I’m done. I must remember that we should go through our lives with compassion. Thank you, Kitty, for reminding me what Maggi said.
By Diana T on 06/13/2008 7:32 pm
Dr. Mark Klein
Kitty—Women of all ages generally, and particularly very successful women, adore me. Not only am I tall (6-4), slender, well-to-do, bathe daily & wear clean clothes, possess a very sunny disposition, enjoy enabling women to act out their sexual fantasy life usually for the first time, and am fun to be with, I’m not your basic American pussy whipped “sensitive” male.
By Dr. Mark Klein on 06/13/2008 2:52 pm
Lady Gator
But Markie — you’re telling us what you think you are. But, you see, I don’t want to be insensitive, but you just aren’t good looking!!!!!
By Lady Gator on 06/13/2008 3:21 pm
Gianna Bracco
But he bathes daily, that must count for something. Personally, I’m not fond of “old man smell.”
By Gianna Bracco on 06/13/2008 4:49 pm
Mugsy Peabody
Tom! There it goes again. “ID-10-T error, ID-10-T!….” Can you help us with this? Maybe a special virus protection against the ID-10-T’s? Please????
By Mugsy Peabody on 06/14/2008 7:06 pm
Lady Gator
Marlo — When we lived in Mempis I was very firtunate to have the opportunity to tour St. Jude’s Hospital. The caring people on the staff — the incredible facilities — the wonderful children and their brave parents. All such a wonderful legacy to your father. Danny Thomas is loved and revered for his undying support of St. Jude’s Hospital and his love for children with cancer. I shall always remember “The Danny Thomas Show” — but more importantly, I will always remember his tenderness and sincerity and I will always admire his ability to make St. Jude a reality. He definitely should be regarded as a man worthy of great honor.
By Lady Gator on 06/13/2008 1:08 pm
Lady Gator
Marlo — Sorry I meant to say “fortunate”. After being away for a day — I have to retrain my typing fingers!!
By Lady Gator on 06/13/2008 1:22 pm
Alice Wolfson
my Dad always used to sigh, whenever I was grumpy, which was often as a teen, and say: “Youth is wasted on the young.” As a kid I thought he was crazy. Now I know exactly what he meant.
By Alice Wolfson on 06/13/2008 3:41 pm
Dr. Mark Klein
Alice-My father said the same thing. Heaven on earth nowadays to be an attractive older single guy in reasonably good health, grown kids doing well, and no financial worries.
By Dr. Mark Klein on 06/13/2008 5:07 pm
Mugsy Peabody
Tom! “ID-10-T! ID-10-T!”
By Mugsy Peabody on 06/14/2008 7:07 pm
Sandbee (FB) 54
Just this mental problem that causes you to think you are attractive to females.
By Sandbee (FB) 54 on 06/19/2009 6:34 pm
James the Game
Ha, ha! Bee responding to "Dr. Klein", even though he posted that a year ago! But you’re right! I heard the Tigers will be playing in Houston soon.
By James the Game on 06/20/2009 9:02 pm
Sandbee (FB) 54
Sometimes I feel it is better late than never James.  Yeah, I think they are coming down here next week, unless the heat does them in I’m sure they will cream us.  We are doing better in the hitting but not in the pitching.  And Happy Birthday again.
By Sandbee (FB) 54 on 06/21/2009 7:43 am
James the Game

Well, it’ll be indoors, so that should help. Tigers were on national TV (FOX) yesterday, and won. Alfredo Figaro (FIG’-uh-row) pitched his first major-league game, and did okay. Detroit needs someone to step up in the rotation, because after Verlander-Jackson-Porcello, no one has been that good.

Thanks again for the birthday wishes. Stay cool.

By James the Game on 06/21/2009 12:22 pm
Sandbee (FB) 54
Well, indoors if we close the roof, it’s really great down there at night with the roof open, right down town with the building lights around you.  Take care.
By Sandbee (FB) 54 on 06/21/2009 12:52 pm