Politics | 10/03/2008 11:30 am

'Dumpster Babies' Law Leads to Abandonment of Nebraska Teens

By The Staff at wowOwow.com

All states have laws allowing parents to drop off their newborn babies at a hospital, police station or other safe place – no questions asked – in an effort to save the lives of those often unwanted children.

But in Nebraska, some parents are using the law to drop off their older, often unruly teenagers, The New York Times reports. Nebraska’s law is broader than other states, and it protects children up to age 19. Fifteen children were dropped off last month by parents or other relatives who said they just couldn’t handle raising them.

One mom left her 14-year-old son at a police station in Omaha on September 1, while three other teens were soon abandoned in hospitals in Omaha and Lincoln. A 15-year-old boy and an 11-year-old girl were later left. Last week, a single father dropped off nine of his ten children at an Omaha hospital, saying his wife had died and he couldn’t raise all of them on his own.

The abandonments have caused an outcry about parental irresponsibility and promises to change the state law. But it has also focused on the issue of family turmoil around the country and what many experts say is a shortage of respite care, counseling and especially psychiatric services to help financially and emotionally strapped parents.

"These days there’s a huge void in services for helping distressed families," said Mark Courtney, an expert on child welfare at the University of Washington.

Officials and some private agencies differ about the adequacy and effectiveness of the state’s family programs, but many say there is help out there, you just have to find it.

“In Nebraska, as in a lot of states, we don’t have sufficient funding to provide a really strong mental-health system for kids,” Judy Kay, chief operating officer for the Child Saving Institute in Omaha, told the Times. “But we do have resources that many parents are not aware of or are not using."

28 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

I think this so sad I could cry reading about it - I feel like I’m in a time warp during the Great Depression when boxcar children were created and orphanages filled with children that parents couldn’t support - I know in some of these cases it may be that there are emotional issues not just financial - but I do think we (government, or someone) need to prepare a system for the financial issues so we don’t create a Hansel & Gretel environment for kids whose parents cannot afford them any longer but the image of a teenager standing there while their parent drives off is so overwhelming my stomach hurts just typing it - a baby doesn’t know at that second of its abandonment but a teenager, a child? what does the parent say, stay here? my kids are 15, 9 and 4 and the image of physically driving them to a police station or hospital and then getting them somehow to stay there and then leaving is more than I can describe in words… this is so upsetting, I’m crying at my desk - lunchtime!

By Chips AHoey on 10/03/2008 10:48 am

e-mail alert

Oh, I hope they don’t change the law. I would rather know the children, even teens, are left in a safe environment than somewhere dangerous. Or that a teen was not just put out on the street. This just emphasises the need for community involvement with families, supportive services emotionally, psychologically, and financially if need be. There has to be more emphasis on the family with children. We don’t have the extended family that use to support each other when times were tough. Things have changed and people feel alone with their troubles and don’t know where to turn to for help. That is what is so heart breaking. Children left alone without someone to turn to and parents so scared, alone and not knowing how to deal with parenting. We have to recognize this as a national problem and take some time to determine what options we need to explore to remedy this. Haven’t we evolved enough that we can look at the community as a whole and work for the greater good for all?

By Dab-a- do on 10/03/2008 12:27 pm

e-mail alert

Chips…I couldn’t image taking my 2 1/2 year old and just dropping her off…She would freak out & know that I was leaving her…I am going to say this and get it out…I am sure those parents who are dropping their kids off b/c they cant handle them anymore wished they spanked them growing up and didnt just use “time out”…We use time out with our daughter when the punishment calls for it and then other times she gets a spanking…I have been told not to spank by my Counselor but Im sorry when my child picks up a fork and throws it across a restaurant, she got spanked…she did it b/c she didnt want to eat anymore & her fork was still on the table…SORRY her little butt got spanked. But yes Chips I agree…I could not imagine being 15 and my parents dropping me off somewhere but then again our society has let these kids grow up thinking they dont have to own anything. They can act and do as they please & its ok. Teachers have to be politically correct and not correct our children and protect their fragile beings…We have to have Trophies even for teams that didnt win… I feel for the father who dropped 9 of his 10 kids off but that is the choice him and his wife made to have that many kids. I am glad he dropped them off somewhere instead of hurting them or worse killing them, like the other Mother did and stuffed her kids in a freezer… Its great that we can have this law that you can drop your kids off but not grown kids…Man oh man what is this world coming too….

By C Hardy on 10/03/2008 12:33 pm

e-mail alert

CO, Today children have no boundries, no manners, no respect, and no one seems to get the fact that this is WRONG for the child.Animals swat their young they have more sense then people. I applaud the people who take their children somewhere for help, rather then just leave them to fend for themselves. My question is if we can take in and support all the illegals, why can’t we help our own, they should come first. I’ts not happeing.

By Jazzy JJ on 10/04/2008 7:48 am

e-mail alert

JJ Jaszz, that is the point I was trying to make about the parents having to drop their grown kids off…if they would have st boundaries for them from the beginning then maybe they wouldnt be so awful as teenagers…I have a 2 1/2 year old and Yes its hard to set those boundaries but we do it b/c we know when she is a teenager it will be beneficial…I would much rather see our world help our own first but there isnt much I can do about that… The illegals we (being America) takes in and helps are the one’s who do the jobs no body else wants to do b/c Americans are too good for those jobs…I think its wrong how they get into our country and my relatives came over and signed in through Ellis Island…But once they are here and they are doing jobs that you would never see an American do, for the most part, I think we do owe them something…I think its wrong that they work hard but if caught we ship them back…Maybe if they get caught, have them pay taxes on the money they earned being paid under the table by most employers & then give them the paperwork to fill out & file for a green card or work visa…Dont just ship them back so they can do it over and over and over again.

By C Hardy on 10/04/2008 8:16 pm

e-mail alert

The idea that illegals are doing jobs that no American would do is a misconception that was purposefully thrown out there. Most parents in the end would shovel poop rather than let their families starve. Illegals are working jobs under the table. Employers get fined a nominal amount for getting caught doing this. But they can not get by with paying Americans under the table THAT is illegal. The laws about hiring illegals under the table are only token laws that are for the most part unenforced. Only if the press gets wind of a situation do they make a show of punishing and deporting the illegals which are nothing more than pawns, and fining the employers. Which quickly turn around and do it again; because the fine barely puts a scratch in his profits gained by working illegals under the table at less than minimum wage. As for out of hand kids being why parents are dropping them off that is not quite accurate. For one to spank a child in this age can be a dangerous thing where the system is concerned. The system has swung to far into the overprotection area so that a simple spanking can spark an investigation and children removed for abuse in many cities. So spanking becomes a form of Russian roulette. Also many parents are just not financially able to care for their children anymore. Maybe they could when they first had them but over the years as everything but their income goes up their ability to provide for their children deteriotes to nothing. As for mental health. Medicaid for one may say they cover mental health needs; but, the reality is that they often will not approve the care when a parent tries to get it. One loophole I encounterd here when I tried to get my daughter committed for inpatient care was that the doctor came into rthe oom and asked her if she “planned” to harm herself or anyone else. When she said no she was sent home. So unless a person admits to planning to cause harm care is denied. When it comes to the system just is just one of the ways a full cookie jar is shown to the public of all the services and helps available to the poor. But, the reality that the general public is kept unaware of is that the cookie jar’s lid is super glued shut.

By Christine Cline on 10/09/2008 12:22 pm

e-mail alert

When I listen to stories of my family several generations back when all were having babies every other year, there were many more resources in those extended families for taking in nieces and nephews while parents recovered from one thing or another. It was not so uncommon 80 years ago for a kid to spend a year with a grandparent or aunt and uncle, especially after the birth of a sibling. Today, it is less accepted, though sometimes done. I think that parents do need more respite services. A friend of mine had a disabled son and needed to place him in respite care for three weeks every year just so her husband and other children could have some time that was not centered around the needs of the disabled son. Eventually, he got so sick, he had to be in respite care around the clock. I feel sorry for the parents in Nebraska as well as the children. One does not surrender one’s children unless it is necessary. I hope that they work out ways to get back together.

By Elizabeth Bennett on 10/03/2008 12:36 pm

e-mail alert

apparently nine of these kids were from one family the oldest one eighteen the youngest I think 2 or 3. The father dropped them off i believe his wife died of a brain aneurysm a year to year in a half ago and he was overwhelmed and had a lot of financial difficulties. What a sad sad story. I read that several relatives were willing to help. Yes I agree it was that families personal choice to have 10 children but the important thing here is that children do not fall through the cracks. It might be heartbreaking to all but how many of these children (teens) may have been at risk of neglect or abuse or how many of them are perhaps bipolar or have mental health issues or physical. If a family does not have health insurance and some of these children need treatment they will get it from the state and I know this because we are in the middle of an adoption from foster care for a family members child and all her mental and physical health care is covered. It is true that some children may fall through the cracks but there are many individuals involved in foster care that are truly caring, wonderful people who are doing the type of work Christ called us all to do, which is caring for some of the neediest in our society. We need to pray more, take action more often and do the right thing which is not always to judge others and be divisive. I will leave one last thought which is if all those that are involved in pro life and judging others decisions would be involved in fostering and caring for these children we would have far fewer children in our country needing help. I feel so sad for all the children and for the parents who have truly tried but feel like they are failing. some of these parents may be deadbeat, some may not be but the important thing is that the children and the parents get some help.

By g c on 10/03/2008 7:17 pm

e-mail alert

gc..I really liked what you had to say and echo your thoughts. If pro-life people stepped up to the plate and put their actions where their mouth is it would be a better place. I can’t imagine the pain a parent went through to leave their children. Here is Canada we have Children Aid Societies where you can go for help. It may not be perfect but it is a place where families can get help. Most of the Children Aid Societies offer counseling rather than take children into to care. Giving a child up leaves huge trauma for both the child and the parent. May God go with them all.

By Eve Fulton on 10/04/2008 7:57 am

e-mail alert

You are doing a wonderful thing g c. And as to your last thought, you are say what I have said so often, the too many of the pro-life people are merely pro-birth they do not worry about the life that comes after, taking care of the baby, child, teenager, adult, senior citizen that is the result of that birth.

By Sandbee (FB) 54 on 10/04/2008 8:15 am

e-mail alert

Sandbee, You are singing to the choir. I say a big Amen.

By g c on 10/05/2008 10:09 am

e-mail alert

So SO SO true….as a teacher i really try to tell everyone they have a choice….the just-say-no for sex ed isn’t working….pro-lifers don’t realize that not all people are able to take care of babies…..i have always been pro-choice even though i wouldn’t make the decision to do it…

By nelbie 90 on 04/16/2009 10:24 am

e-mail alert

It takes a community to raise a child and I think our nation has forgotten that rule…Our teachers dont care and neither do your neighbors…Its pretty sad that you can live next to someone for years and years and never really know them or even their names…Sad…

By C Hardy on 10/03/2008 9:42 pm

e-mail alert

C O - I take exception to your comment that teachers don’t care. After teaching for 35 years, I know for a fact that most teachers are caring individuals.. In our district, there was a family who faced eviction and losing their children to foster care. Teachers within the district took those children in until such time as arrangements could be made and even helped repair a house to make it meet requirements so the children could go back to their parents. Another teacher actually adopted twin brothers and earlier had adopted a single child. The twins had lost both parents to drugs. I respect your right to any opinion, but please don’t make sweeping statements such as “teachers don’t care”. I know some don’t, but the majority care more than you’ll ever know.

By Jo Vaughn on 10/04/2008 6:14 pm

e-mail alert

Jo Vaughn, I APOLOGIZE that I used the words “teachers dont care”…Maybe I should have said SOME teachers dont care…My friend’s son is a very, very, very smart child…In the first grade his teacher would give them work or show them how to do a problem and he would within minutes figure out a quicker better way of solving that problem…he would get sent to the Principal’s Office for disrupting the class b/c he wouldnt do it the way the Teacher wanted him too…His Mother always taught him to think outside the box and his teacher told him, that was not a good thing…said that to a first grader and his Mother…Yes there are still caring teachers in this world and I pray that when my daughter is old enough to attend school her teachers are…But most kids now a days when they become teachers its b/c they know those jobs will always be around, not b/c they really want to make a difference in a child’s life…That is what some have told me to my face, “oh its a great career b/c we will always need teachers”—that really makes me wonder… I am so proud that your school did that for those kids, that is the kind of news I would much rather be hearing at 6 o’clock then what we end up with!

By C Hardy on 10/04/2008 8:25 pm