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Edith Ann | 09/23/2008 2:30 pm

Life In the Little Lane: Edith Ann Is Looking for Another Line of Work

As a recent member of the human race, I must say I am fed up with a lot of what I see happening with politicians in politics. I have to say I don’t like the way either side is running their campaign. And, as an investigative reporter for my school paper, I don’t like the way some of the members of the press report lies in place of news. As a child, I think I am qualified to say that everyone is acting childish. Also, I don’t like that they are making fun of pigs. I love the way pigs look – without makeup of any kind. 

I must admit, like many politicians, I sometimes lie – I’ve told some whoppers. But I always get punished when I lie. How come politicians don’t get punished like I do? Their lies are even bigger than mine. And they are told to many more people. When I lie, it’s just to a handful of people – my parents, my sister, one teacher and a very, very small group of friends.

Not long ago, I was pretty sure I wanted to be president when I grew up. Not because I had already read My Pet Goat but because I have some good ideas on how to reduce my carbon footprint and make the world a better place – but, at this point, I don’t think I want to be president. President Bush took us to war and we have been in Iraq most of my entire life. And I sure don’t want to be vice president, I know that! Vice President Cheney shot someone in the face and Sarah Palin who wants to replace Mr. Cheney as vice president likes to shoot animals from airplanes. And she wants to drill, drill, drill everywhere for oil. Is this why she’d be a good replacement for Mr. Cheney?

So, anyway, I have decided to rethink my career plans. I don’t think I would make a good president or vice president. I don’t like war or shooting people in the face or shooting poor, defenseless animals from airplanes. This, to me, is worse than Hubby, our school bully, killing poor ants in the hot sun with a magnifying glass.

I have to face the fact I will just have to look for another line of work.

Maybe I could be a scientist. I read that scientists just did an experiment to find out the truth about the origin of the universe. Of course, this important experiment most likely got done because a group of politicians OK’d the money for this project — which, I guess, is about as close to the truth as most politicians will ever come. Sad to say, this great experiment did not happen in America – it took place in a collider or something on the Swiss/French border where I guess they are more interested in discovering the truth about the origin of the universe than about what Senator Obama meant when he said "putting lipstick on a pig."

This scientific project, if you ask me, is the exact opposite of when Congress gave money for the "Bridge to Nowhere." In science class, there is this quote: “Science is truth found out.” I never have figured out what that means. So, now that I think of it, I guess I would not make a good scientist. I know this — when I get old enough to vote, I will vote for the type of politicians who help scientists discover the truth. I will not vote for the type of politicians who cover it up. And that’s the truth.

204 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

mary lou s
edith ann, i love it when you tell the truth as you just did. my aunt and i were talking, asking each other if eisenhower was the last honest president. but we forgot about jimmy carter. still, bill clinton was honest about government business, and he paid big time for his big lie. i hope obama becomes the next president.
By mary lou s on 09/23/2008 1:51 pm
Jane Wagner
Me Too, Mary Lou, but don’t tell anyone.
By Jane Wagner on 09/23/2008 5:46 pm
Santa F
Kids may say the most incredible things …But when it comes to Edith Ann…she calls them as she sees them …Wish more of our adults, like the press would do the same … If Politicians were punished for lying we would surly know where to find Cheney he would be in a jump suit in Danbury CT. and Bush would be having meals in Beaumont, TX …So Edith not everyone gets punished for lying …but it would be nice if we could count on those whohave the power to tell us the truth …
By Santa F on 09/23/2008 2:03 pm
Kryssi K
…if politicians were punished for lying, there wouldn’t BE any left. Which is fine with me. “If we all stop voting, will they all just GO AWAY?”
By Kryssi K on 09/23/2008 3:36 pm
Obama Biden
VOTING is a privilege One that should not be joked about or taken for granted one day we might not have that right!
By Obama Biden on 09/23/2008 7:33 pm
Kryssi K
Really? The 2000 election results would suggest otherwise.
By Kryssi K on 09/23/2008 7:40 pm
Obama Biden
lol? I didn’t vote for Bush if that’s what you were implying………..
By Obama Biden on 09/23/2008 7:51 pm
Kryssi K
Nope, not at all what I was implying, actually. That was in response to your ironic assessment of our voting system. I was referring to who TRULY won that particular election, and the disturbing fact that he is somehow NOT the sadistic, knuckle-dragging, feces-slinging redneck I’ve had to stare at and listen to for the past eight years… I’m no expert but please explain to me how/why voting is so important if the popular vote can be overridden by an “electoral college”? And why is voting considered a privilege when the president of the the entire country is elected through ballots that vary STATE BY STATE? (e.g., in my state, there is NEVER a third party on our ballot, there is no line to write in our alternative choice besides Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber, rendering those of us who think independently unable to really voice our opinions via voting…) And by the way, I do appreciate that you did not vote for Bush; however, it seems questionable to me that someone who DIDN’T vote for him that year could remain so optimistic about such an obsolete voting system…
By Kryssi K on 09/23/2008 8:18 pm
Obama Biden
point well taken!
By Obama Biden on 09/23/2008 8:30 pm
Obama Biden
as I have said for months We the People will soon be under dictatorship, IF McCain /Palin get it!! I still feel the vote of our country’s people must be placed at least WE THE PEOPLE know which way “we the people voted”!!
By Obama Biden on 09/23/2008 8:45 pm
Serena .
Kryssi/Lipstick, Did either of you see the HBO Documentary, “Hacking Democracy”? It will make your head spin (and you’ll spit nails too). http://www.hbo.com/docs/programs/hackingdemocracy/synopsis.html
By Serena . on 09/24/2008 11:30 am
Obama Biden
NO but ty for the insite…i will post it Electronic voting machines count about 87% of the votes cast in America today. But are they reliable? Are they safe from tampering? From a current congressional hearing to persistent media reports that suggest misuse of data and even outright fraud, concerns over the integrity of electronic voting are growing by the day. And if the voting process is not secure, neither is America’s democracy. The timely, cautionary documentary HACKING DEMOCRACY exposes gaping holes in the security of America’s electronic voting system. In the 2000 presidential election, an electronic voting machine recorded minus 16,022 votes for Al Gore in Volusia County, Fla. While fraud was never proven, the faulty tally alerted computer scientists, politicians and everyday citizens to the very real possibility of computer hacking during elections. In 2002, Seattle grandmother and writer Bev Harris asked officials in her county why they had acquired electronic touch screen systems for their elections. Unsatisfied with their explanation, she set out to learn about electronic voting machines on her own. In the course of her research, which unearthed hundreds of reported incidents of mishandled voting information, Harris stumbled across an “online library” of the Diebold Corporation, discovering a treasure trove of information about the inner-workings of the company’s voting system. Harris brought this proprietary “secret” information to computer security expert Dr. Avi Rubin of Johns Hopkins University, who determined that the software lacked the necessary security features to prevent tampering. Her subsequent investigation took her from the trash cans of Texas to the secretary of state of California and finally to Florida, where a “mini-election” to test the vulnerability of the memory cards used in electronic voting produced alarming results. As the scope of her mission grew, Harris drew on the expertise of other computer- science experts, politicians and activists, among them: Andy Stephenson, candidate for secretary of state in Washington state; Susan Bernecker, Republican candidate in New Orleans; Kathleen Wynne, an activist from Cleveland; Dr. Herbert Thompson, chief security strategist, Security Innovation, Inc.; Ion Sancho, supervisor of elections for Leon County, Fla.; and Harri Hursti, a computer-security analyst. Academics, public officials and others seen in interview footage include: Deanie Lowe, supervisor of elections, Volusia County, Fla.; Mark Radke, marketing director of Diebold; David Cobb, presidential candidate, Green Party; and Rep. Stephanie Tubbs-Jones of Ohio. Diebold software, or other software like it, is installed in thousands of counties across 32 states. David Dill, professor of computer science at Stanford, says the problem is that there are “lots of people involved in writing the software, and lots of people who could have touched the software before it went into that machine. If one of those people put something malicious in the software and it’s distributed to all the machines, then that one person could be responsible for changing tens of thousands of votes, maybe even hundreds of thousands, across the country.” In Florida, Leon County supervisor of elections Ion Sancho presided over a trial “mini-election” to see if the vote could be hacked without being detected. Before votes were actually cast, computer analyst Harri Hursti “stuffed the ballot box” by entering votes on the computer’s memory card. Then, after votes were cast, the results displayed when the same memory card was entered in the central tabulating program indicated that fraud was indeed possible. In other words, by accessing a memory card before an election, someone could change the results - a claim Diebold had denied was possible. Ultimately, Bev Harris’ research proved that the top-secret computerized systems counting the votes in America’s public elections are not only fallible, but also vulnerable to undetectable hacking, from local school board contests to the presidential race. With the electronic voting machines of three companies - Diebold, ES&S and Sequoia - collectively responsible for around 80 percent of America’s votes today, the stakes for democracy are high. One of the executive producers of HACKING DEMOCRACY is Sarah Teale, whose previous HBO credits include “Dealing Dogs” and “Bellevue: Inside Out.” HACKING DEMOCRACY was directed by Simon Ardizzone and Russell Michaels; produced by Simon Ardizzone, Robert Carrillo Cohen and Russell Michaels; executive producers, Earl Katz, Sarah Teale and Sian Edwards; edited by Sasha Zik. For HBO: supervising producer, John Hoffman; executive producer, Sheila Nevins
By Obama Biden on 09/24/2008 11:57 am
Obama Biden
WOOOOOOW000000WOOOOOOOOOOW……MAYBE WE SHOULD UMMM UMMMCHANGE” something! how did they do it before? Paper ballots? Then maybe we should go back to that way what do you all think?
By Obama Biden on 09/24/2008 12:02 pm
Serena .
Lipstick, Nothing personal, but it takes up a lot less space if you just post the link. :)
By Serena . on 09/24/2008 12:54 pm
Obama Biden
some of us don’t know how to do that so I do this for those who don’t but Ty for Ur informative opinion
By Obama Biden on 09/24/2008 1:34 pm