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Sheila Nevins | 04/03/2008 12:00 am

She Lied About Her Age

Sheila Nevins

Fiction

April lied about her age.

When she was 14 she said she was 15; and she got the job as counselor at summer camp.

Now things were different; she lied the other way.

She even lied to the vet about her dog’s age — she was so used to lying.
She said Maya, her Shih Tzu, was eleven when she was truly thirteen.

Maybe she just didn’t want Maya to be too close to the age when most Shih Tzu should be dead. She thought that might be the reason.

But, why did she lie about her own age? April would alter her age by 1 – 10 years.
She even lied to her elliptical cardio-machine when it asked for the age of the exerciser.

Why? Did she want the gift of extra-time? Had she wasted too much of life?

She was not sure why she did this, really.

But, she was not alone.

Close friends, some celebrated, told her of their various infidelities, their SSRIs, their true weight, and about their vibrators; yet, they lied to her about their age — as if age was an embarrassment they needed to disguise.

Shameful digits.

Was it vanity? Fear of life expectancy? Fear of being discarded, obsolete?
How tragic, she thought, not to be proud of earning time on earth.
How tragic not to bellow an advancing number.

She was confused by her lying. She was mostly truthful.

So, when her vet called to say that Maya, her Shih Tzu, needed eye-surgery, April panicked.
In dog years, a week was a month. Her heart pounded.

“Dr. McGreevy. Dr. McGreevy. Maya’s really thirteen. I lied when I said eleven.
Is the operation still safe?”

“Oh, yes,” he said, “just a small lid cancer. She’s not a pup, but she’s strong, so let’s stop it before it spreads. Maya will be fine. Why did you lie, April?
Why did you say Maya was eleven when she is thirteen?”

“Frankly, Doc.,” she said, “I don’t know, exactly.”

And, then her tone changed.

“Just keep her alive, Dr. McGreevy. My Maya means the world to me.”
 
Read more about: Fiction

39 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

Josie Sullivan
I never lie about my age. I have been known to count the years since 1963 in order to remember how old I am. I am too young to have to do that!
By Josie Sullivan on 04/03/2008 1:09 pm
Ginny G.
I loved the story, perhaps because I am just as bad as April, although I do draw the line in my own medical situations. The trouble is, because I lie so much, when the truth is important, I have to stop and calculate. How silly is that!
By Ginny G. on 04/03/2008 6:31 pm
CAROLINE MuLVEY
I always tell my age (45) and if I forget my husband is there to help me “remembeer”. LOL
By CAROLINE MuLVEY on 04/03/2008 8:04 pm
J B
Never lie about my age. Never have. I am going to be 49 in 5 days. I cannot wait to be 50. I had the biggest Birthday party ever when I turned 40…then pledged from that point on to have “Birthday Week” instead of just the day!
By J B on 04/04/2008 6:37 am
regina rosen
I do it in reverse - I always say I’m a few years older and the reaction is : WOW, YOU LOOK GREAT! I don’t think age is a big deal and I wonder: if you say you’re younger than you are, do you think you’re fooling anyone OR are they really thinking GEE, SHE LOOKS TERRIBLE?
By regina rosen on 04/04/2008 10:51 am
Babette dYveine
As I said on another post — Any woman who tells her age will tell anything!
By Babette dYveine on 04/04/2008 1:09 pm
FA S
No, I don’t lie about my age. I don’t dye my hair either. It doesn’t bother me being 53. A woman who lies about her age will lie about anything.
By FA S on 04/04/2008 4:32 pm
Candelaria Silva
The only people who don’t get older are dead people. I have a few friends who died in their 30s and 40s and I bet you they would trade places to be here and proudly be in their 50s (like me). I got married for a second time at age 50 and, although searching for a new job after leaving my last one of 9 1/2 years is tough - I’m blaming it on the economy, on the fact that there are lots of jobs I don’t apply for now because I know what I’d be getting myself into. I figure - I have to work so I will find work. I’m trying to piece together a life and earnings that do not require full-time employment. I don’t lie - I dye.
By Candelaria Silva on 04/04/2008 6:31 pm
Joni Evans
I was always the youngest person in the room, until one day— when I woke up— I was the oldest. (How the hell did that happen?) At first, honestly, I found myself feeling ashamed…what if they found out I was ten years older than everyone else? What if they thought I should be retired? But I also realized I was far more knowledgeable than everyone in the room because I had had the ten more years of experience they didn’t, I had had the trials and errors that made me smarter. So, instead of hiding my age, I decided to flaunt it: “Well, I’ve been doing this for thirty years and I tried that solution and it doesn’t work.” I could see their eyes go wide. I could almost see their brains calculating…30 years in the industry? Why, that would make her…???—-the shock that I was well into my fifties while they were still barely forty. You know what? They got over it. You know what? I got over it. And thinking clearly, being proud of my experience, proud of my age, set me free. I never hide my age. Moreover, now ten years later at 65, I tell my age whenever I can.
By Joni Evans on 04/04/2008 9:26 pm
cloud pic
*Laughing* You know what truly rattles me about aging? It’s when I am startled into realizing that certain important roles in society are filled by people who are younger than I! First it was the occasional doctor. Later it was assorted government positions. Depending upon how the election goes, I may go into quite a shock after our new President takes the oath of office. Perhaps when the Pope is older than I, it will stop disturbing me?
By cloud pic on 04/04/2008 9:51 pm
Debbie B
My mother, now 92, lied about her age from the time she met then married my father. Back in 1948, she did not want his family to know her true age fearing they would influence him not to marry an “old maid.” (she would have been 33!) I only learned of her true age as an adult when we were at a governemnet office together and she had to show her social security card. She continues to lie about her age as she feels people would treat her differently if they know she was in her 90’s. This is a woman who goes to the fitness center 3-4 days a week! We now talk about “cell age’ instead of chronological age. I never lie about my age.
By Debbie B on 04/05/2008 9:34 am
J B
I never lied about my age but now that I’ve turned 70, I’m not sure that was so smart. I can’t believe my age. It sounds old to me so I can just imagine what my business associates and others are thinking. I guess I’ll get used to it. After all “honesty is the best policy” or so they say.
By J B on 04/05/2008 2:11 pm
Hedda Lettuce
I had my first birthday party when I was 30. I remember thinking then that if I died at age 30, I really couldn’t grumble because I had already lived such a full life! I was working full time, finished college, was a mother, and had traveled extensively. It felt good! I am glad I didn’t die then because I have had so many more experiences and at the age of 58, I am looking forward to still more! Lie about my age? I think not! I’m proud to be 58 with several lifetimes of experience under my dyed hair!
By Hedda Lettuce on 04/05/2008 7:07 pm
CG W
Age? No. Although I do have trouble from time-to-time remembering it exactly. Hair color? No, and it changes all the time. That’s the beauty of it. Weight? Hmm, yes, and it, too, changes all the time. Whether that’s beautiful or not, is in the eye of the beholder.
By CG W on 04/06/2008 11:55 am
Jane Lawrance
I’m seeing a guy who’s 28, I’m 43 but he thinks I’m 35, should I shatter his illusion?
By Jane Lawrance on 04/06/2008 2:57 pm