Joni Evans | 03/21/2008 12:42 pm

The Luxury Cockroach

So, this morning, I had breakfast with my good friend, Geraldine Fabrikant. She writes all things financial for The New York Times, and we were discussing the erupting volcanoes in the present economy when she told me a great story:

A feisty friend of Gerry’s was on a two-night vacation in Naples, Florida, at a super-chic hotel. After a wonderful day at the pool, she returned to her room to discover a cockroach that had been enjoying life near a hotel picture frame. Thinking fast, she managed to trap and kill the insect. Thinking even faster, she wrapped up the bug carcass, put it into a bag and brought it downstairs to the crowded lobby reception desk.

There, she leaned over to the receptionist, and said in a somewhat ominous voice that she needed to discuss something with her that she was SURE she wouldn’t want anyone else to hear. In a secluded office, Gerry’s friend opened her bag to reveal its contents and said: "I don’t think you want to have this dialog in public."

The horrified receptionist did not. The evidence went back into the bag and Gerry’s friend’s stay was extended one extra night. Free.

Read more about: Gossip, Travel, Vacation

47 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

Joyce, you’ve opened an ant hill with this recollection. In grad school in Cambridge, we used to segment our expenses in envelopes, and always saved a $ or two for a night out. One night in our favorite restaurant, in Chinatown, we found the recipe for real Sweet & Sour Pork in a book by the cashier. Unable to afford it, we each memorized half the recipe, and made a mad dash for the MTA back to Cambrige, repeating our portion to ourselves all the way - we didn’t even have pen and paper. Once home, we recorded this infamous recipe, and delighted in our find. Sunday’s Boston Herald carried a front page story about “our” restaurant being raided during the night by the health department. They found felines hanging in the deep freeze room; owners swore they were “piglets,” but the health official was quoted as stating he’d never seen piglets with long, straight tails, and the reply was they come uncoiled when they die. Needless to say, my estwhile spouse was very ill and virtually staggered back to his research lab where he was undertaking a 2nd PhD. Go figure.

By Upanaway on 03/22/2008 1:11 pm

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As a teenager (many moon’s ago) I flipped hamburgers after school. It was a great job. If you knew what went on behind the counter you might be shocked. I remember the boys would trap the bugs and flies and throw them into the fry vat and at the same time drop in a basket full of fries to be cooked. The oil in these places is used and reused until it can’t be used anymore. Food in the freezers are left uncovered. Many of these establishments are now run 24 hours. It takes along time to breakdown the drink and shake machines to clean them. I don’t think things have changed much since the 70’s. I think it’s gotten worse. Ask any kid working in one of the places today. Better yet ask them if they wash their hands.

By Tammy Moore on 03/22/2008 10:10 am

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I once lifted the candle holder on our table at a restaurant and a cockroach scurried out from underneath it. It was a good appetite suppressant.

By Kay Sara on 03/22/2008 1:26 pm

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I stayed in a luxury hotel near Union Square in San Francisco. I was enjoying a delightful time of seclusion with breakfast in bed….UNTIL….a rat ran in front of the TV. I called and “ratted” the rat out. They immediately upgraded me to a beautiful suite, but I still on the lookout for rodents and bugs, so I really never relaxed. www.createanewseason.com

By Maryann Lowry on 03/22/2008 3:21 pm

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roaches are enormous in Florida.

By J L on 03/22/2008 3:49 pm

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She all did it in a cool manner, if it was me I would have burst right out demanding them to go inspect the room now. Afer all, there still might be more cockaroaches in there right? They move in crowds.

By Lieutenant Felicia on 03/22/2008 7:53 pm

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You won’t believe this.I once had a Chanel bag sent home avoiding sales tax and when I opened the box a HUGE BLACK BUG FLEW OUT,was definitely NOT an American bug.IN 5 MINUTES sent the bag back w/flying bug note. DianeG,

By Charles Dance on 03/22/2008 9:46 pm

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By Charles Dance on 03/22/2008 9:46 pm

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That is an extortion, so the roach didn’t scare her, it actually inspired her to stay an extra night. if she could find all kinds of bugs in her room, she would stay there for a week. What if the place is totally infested would she move in? Did she use that trick before? What else she does?

By helene lorraine on 03/23/2008 12:58 am

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OKAY - so it’s 3 a.m. (Easter Sunday no less) and I can’t sleep and am reading all the “fun” on my favorite website - and am now totally spooked to go to bed - roaches, bedbugs and nighmares OH MY!

By Sharon Belko on 03/23/2008 5:12 am

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My sister moved from California to the Caribbean when her husband was transferred and where they stayed in a luxury hotel (gratis his company) while fixing up their new beachfront rental. She was in the rental on hands and knees reaching behind things to clean and ensure the place was absolutely pristine before she moved in. She returned to the hotel hot, sweaty and rather disheveled, and checked at the front desk for mail. The clerk looked up at her and gasped. Upstairs in her hotel room she looked in the mirror and saw why. There was a large cockroach smashed against her face. The ick factor was pretty high.

By Buh-Bye Hillary Hillary Buh-Bye on 03/23/2008 5:28 am

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she sold herself out too cheap. my friend and i found what we thought were bedbugs in her bed- she had several bites. the manager assured us they were not bedbugs and comped her whole four days. and of course, she had to sign a waver that after careful consideration there were no bedbugs. we changed our room anyway!!!!

By ellen lattman on 03/23/2008 1:06 pm

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she sold herself out too cheap. while vacationing in canyon ranch in tucson, my roomate and i found what we thought were bedbugs in her bed (she had a few bites) the manager had the room cleaned fromn top to bottom and assured us there were no bedbugs. he comped her stay (four days) and she had to sign a waver saying what she thought were bugs were not.

By ellen lattman on 03/23/2008 1:09 pm

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Good on her for getting the extension to her stay, but really, that was a palmetto bug, not a cockroach. When you live in Florida you get used to them. They are super big and don’t cluster like northern, urban cockroaches. True, it used to freak me out when one would land in my hair, but I regard them as benign. Once in awhile a gecko would wander in as well and prey on them.

By Elizabeth Gage on 03/24/2008 1:36 am

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i work at a hotel -we work very hard to keep things as clean and safe as they can be- we have occasionally had a cockroach appear- this is a old building in the middle of a city with 2 resturants cockroaches have survived since the beginning of time-it dosen’t mean a place is dirty just tell the staff very nicely and they will help you no need to be indignant bedbugs on the other hand are a different issue- again there is a resugerence -hotels are doing their best - try and check if you can we don’t live in a bug free or germ free world-it wouldn’t be good for us if we did-

By ann dillon on 03/25/2008 11:41 am