Politics | 06/04/2008 9:35 am

At This Historic Moment ... A wOw Reader Quote That Says It All

Comment to Women on the Web Forum: Hillary Announcement Watch at wowOwow on June 3

Frank Peterson - 6/3/2008 5:09 PM

Stop a moment and think about this: a black man in the White House. When I voted for John Kennedy in my first vote for the presidency, the thought of a woman in the White House was so far in the future that few thought about it or even let the possibility into the mind. The same thing about a black man in the White House — unthinkable. Now, 40-plus years later we have both. I find that amazing and incredible and I’m so happy I lived to see this day. I don’t know about the rest of you but that makes my century. That gives me hope, finally, after 40 years of incompetents and snake-oil salesmen in the White House, that the impossible is coming true. That is so incredible that I am stunned and elated by it all. Finally.

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Frank - I hope you’re taking time to read this before taking off for other websites. As far as I’m concerned you’ve never “crossed a line”. I wrote to you that you have restored my faith in MANkind…and that was not lightly or easily stated. Sexist? You? Uh…I don’t think so! Many women, myself included, have been deeply wounded by the men in their personal lives and beyond. But you are not responsible for any of that, and I think we have much to learn from each other - we women over 40 and men like you who are respectful to us. More than that, I think we who have become your friends have given you an avenue for sharing your thoughts about Anne, we have empathized with your missing her, and we have shared with you some of our own losses. So, I hope you’ll reconsider and stick around. If we’re ever going to have a fully functional community, then you should be a part of it. And I don’t consider this “gushy”. That’s not my style. Maurine

By Maurine H on 06/05/2008 1:44 am

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Frank, the problem is not that your quote was chosen, and mostly the ladies seem to like you. It isn’t about you, do you understand that? It’s about a website that purports to be for women over 40 and then does a story on a film maker who raped a 13-year-old girl, as though there are no women filmmakers worth discussing. It’s about a website that has a column on men photographers, when there are thousands upon thousands of brilliant, talented women photographers in the United States. It’s about talking about cosmetic surgery when gas prices have gone up $.50 in the past week in the Bay Area. It’s about allowing the vicious anti-womanist loud-mouth Klein to continue to disrupt our conversations and insult us. You’ve personalized what I said. Of course your comment is a good one. But this is a woman’s website, and rather than sympathizing with Sen. Clinton who has run a strong and brilliant campaign, and in spite of being outspent two to one, very nearly winning, we are still “bashing” her. it isn’t acceptable to me, and it isn’t about you, Frank. It’s about sexism, and in this case, the blindness of women toward their own sexism. Sexism? Why are hookers still arrested in this country? Why not johns? It is so deep and pervasive, it should be obvious to the most casual observer. But this website is supposedly for women over 40, and I expect them to have a little sensitivity toward this major issue of our time, that women in the United States are still second-class citizens. And I certainly do not expect them to tout a child rapist; I don’t want to read about Norman flipping Mailer on a women’s website when he was famous for being a sexist prick. You can take your marbles and go home, Frank. If that is what you want to do. Or you can stay and explain to the ladies upstairs that you also want them to do better.

By Mugsy Peabody on 06/05/2008 2:03 am

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Mugsy, I think the pain and anguish that countless women (self-included) have experienced at the hands of men and rampant abuses make sexism an incendiary topic at it’s best. It seems though that in your post of 6/4/2008 8:33 PM, you in fact did make it about Frank. I have re-read what you have written several times on this thread. Your comments regarding choices made on the website are so exacting and valid. It appears this is where your angst lies. Why then is this the arena you chose to voice it? And why target Frank and what you perceive to be his knowledge of sexism? I think it is distracting from the larger more important assertions that you have brought forth.

By T S on 06/05/2008 8:20 am

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mugsy and to all do any of you see what has happened here? i am again ashamed of this website supposed to be for and by women. and yet we still play the same games we did as teenagers. does frank’s quote really say it “all”? not by a longshot!!! what happened to being for women. his quote is supportive of thank god the man won and now we can slap each other on the back and no one said we women are not going to take this any more. women have to make it to the presidency not a word from frank not from any of the bevy of females about how as women we will fight for the right to be in charge the “all” doesn’t include anything about us, women. when will we support each other and try again and again to make it happen all i heard was i don’t like her so i will not vote for her. power is not passed to women because you don’t LIKE her? doesn’t sound like a real reason to me. so all your daughters and grand daughters lost out on tuesday and no one has said anything about HRC and the loss we as women have suffered. this website doesn’t support women who are serious about making the difference in terms of making the majority of people in this country have a real voice in what happens in our government. i hope that at some point the ladies upstairs will allow those of us who are disallusioned to have a chance to say something about how much we have lost and how we will work very hard so that we might have a woman president in twenty years. sorry for all the soapbox stamping and shouting. but i would like to know if at least some of the women on this site are sad about the loss of someone like “us” being president?

By S. B. on 06/05/2008 9:51 am

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Dear S. Bolz, Yes, I am sad. Sad that for as much as I would like from the depths of my soul, women to unite and role model “another way,” at times they miss the mark. I encourage you to read Frank’s post once again. Word for word, line for line. Your paraphrases do not reflect what he wrote. Therefore the inferences you draw from them are erroneous. As for your question, “i would like to know if at least some of the women on this site are sad about the loss of someone like “us” being president?” My answer is “no.” No, because I do not see HRC as a universal representative of women. There have been numerous posts on this site that attempt to address why she is not the “poster’s” chosen candidate based on her politics, past votes (most esp. the war) or conduct in her current office. These are writer’s that attempted to leave her personal attributes, deceitful cheating husband, and most definitely her gender aside. But, still the inevitable return to perpetuate the sexism manifests. This occurred in a series of replies that ignored the solid points being made but once again hooked the conversation back to her gender. You minimize the numerous posts that sought to view Hillary outside the lens of gender by saying “because they didn’t like her.” I feel very frustrated with that. Just because she is a woman, and women are very invested in having a woman in office and getting their “just due” does not mean under any circumstances that everyone will find her “the woman” for the job. To take the leap and scream , “that is sexist!” is in my view keeping the attention to gender and sexism going. That is not to say in a variety of circles that she has clearly been the brunt of the sexist arsenal of weaponry. Let’s start with the mainstream media. However, the media can be a ruthless, unscrupulous, evil entity toward anything mammalian quite frankly and depending on the day, it’s anybody’s guess who or what will face it’s nasty discrimination. If wishes were horses, women, including some on this website would take 5 minutes, center themselves and breathe. From that space I would like for them to determine who they are really angry with and then use the gifts they have access to (like patience, intelligence, balance, sanity, etc) to appropriately address their concerns in a way that can be heard. I believe that’s where empowerment lies. Who among us does not want to be empowered? Ready now for rebuttal…

By T S on 06/05/2008 11:49 am

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Thank you for your kind words, Lily. But I realize as I sit with my faithful companion at my feet as I type, that “I’m not in Kansas anymore.” This is not a place I belong. So I’m clicking the heels of my ruby slippers three times, grateful for what I have learned while here. Namaste.

By T S on 06/05/2008 10:23 pm

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Mugsy, if you’re so upset about what you think is hypocritical, go get your pitchfork and your torch, and parade up and down in front of the NY Post and CBS and the other Founding Mother’s places of employment. And take Dr. Klein and Mark Salling with you. The “ladies upstairs’ are upholding the greatest of our treasures as US Citizens - freedom of speech.

By Lorraine Bates on 06/09/2008 5:29 pm

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Please see my response to “Peg O my heart - 6/4/2008 11:39 PM.”

By T S on 06/05/2008 5:52 am

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Frank, Mugsy said it all . Also, Frank, my darling husband who remembers very little at this point looked onto the TV to see Obama . He looked at me with a question mark on his face. I said: He will be our next President! Husband squinted his tired eyes to make sure he saw correctly. I added : “he is a Democrat!” My man sank into his chair and simply said : About time!!! I cried because in that moment he remembered so much and said it all in two words.

By Jeannot Kensinger on 06/05/2008 7:15 am

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With all due respect, JMK, no “one” says it all.

By T S on 06/05/2008 7:19 am

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I stand corrected

By Jeannot Kensinger on 06/05/2008 7:29 am

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And perhaps the way this feature was introduced , “this one says it all” set a provocative tone rather than a tone of appreciation for the featured wow contributor’s positive commentary in a time when “inclusive” rather than “exclusive” is where as a society we might want to head considering the climate of some pretty troubled times. I think this is a run on sentence but I’m late and need to hustle away from this computer now. My apologies to all the teacher’s on this site in advance. :)

By T S on 06/05/2008 9:00 am

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Tell your husband for me, Ms. Singer, we will overcome. We will. I’ll bet he’ll remember that, and he’ll smile. Thanks for putting this here; I was very touched. All best, MP

By Mugsy Peabody on 06/06/2008 11:16 pm

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Mugsy … not only did I want to join your church (another thread on a QOTD), but I so agree with all you have said here in these last posts of yours … I admit to being a ‘coward’, waited for someone wiser and more eloquent … but what really did/do we expect from a website like this?! … I am not much on the internet but found this site: thru a man - Charlie Rose - whose show is brilliant and who himself is totally brilliantly annoying, pompous - and sexist too… (but where else would I get to see all the great people he has on there, so one puts up with it ….) - and here I am intrigued by reading all these thoughts, ideas and getting this strange ‘insight’ into a group of people communicating in this weird ‘new’ way - mostly not the ‘founders’ of the site (what a silly term anyway, and they are ‘public’ figures and have so many other ‘outlets’ and their contributions here rather seem catalysts for often more interesting conversations then their starting points … ) - so for me it seems about all these interesting people writing here … yet, it is just that, a site written in virtual space … Frank … please, do understand: this did get away a bit into a serious concern about this site and sexism, and it is really not about you personally (your contributions are sweet and fun and interesting, as most are here) … and please don’t be a little boy and pack in and sulk when you are not totally and completely adored by all … I just read a very funny/bitter story by Ursula K. LeGuin about a place where the people are either terrible fighting with each other or they sit alone in their houses and sulk … seems rather poignant here!!! As many miles or moons one tries to walk in another’s shoes … one can not really ‘get’ it: I (white person) will never really get racism, I (goyim) will never really get the fate of the Jewish people, and: men don’t get sexism …

By Ulla on 06/05/2008 9:11 am