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Question of the Day | 09/11/2009 11:50 am

On the anniversary of 9/11, what do you carry in your heart about this day?

This question and the Women’s answers were originally published on wOw in September 2008.
© Shutterstock
Judith Martin

Judith Martin | 09/11/2008 12:00 am

Judith Martin: A Change in Tone

Remember how everyone thought the tone of the everyday world had changed forever? Strangers started behaving politely to one another and being on the lookout to provide help. Estranged families got back in touch. Couples who had been unsure of each other craved permanence and got married. Young people decided to go into public service. Police and firefighters were applauded on the streets. Politicians worked together for the common good. Producers of popular culture started questioning whether what they did was in the best of taste. Abroad, foreigners put up American flags and treated American tourists gently. It was a beautiful example of how we could live if only we decided to. And it lasted about two weeks.
Cynthia McFadden

Cynthia McFadden | 09/11/2008 12:00 am

Cynthia McFadden's Remembrance of 9/11, Off the Record ... and On

I was at the office early that gorgeous September morning. My assistant at ABC was also there. She had a young friend who worked near the Trade Center who called her and said to turn on the television, something weird was going on. I immediately called our news desk and headed downtown with a satellite truck. We were clearly going in the wrong direction. Waves of people, vacant-eyed people walked by us heading north. The truck got stopped by the police but my producer and I continued on foot. Within an hour or so of the first plane hitting the Trade Center, we’d talked our way into the command center. It was totally silent. A horrible deadly silence. I found a payphone — our cells weren’t working — and talked to Peter Jennings live on the air. I told him that, so far, no survivors had made it to the trauma center on the East Side.

We walked through the dusty, silent corridors of New York west to Chelsea Piers. I remember running into Lesley Stahl and her crew. Thousands of doctors and nurses had assembled at the Pier to receive the injured. By midnight not one patient had shown up. A nurse waved me over: "Cynthia, you won’t remember me but I was in the delivery room when your baby was born. Off the record," she continued, "people either made it out, or they didn’t. There are not going to be any wounded coming here."

I called Jennings and asked to speak to him privately. "Peter," I said, "sources down here say that people either made it out or they didn’t. The survivors are safely out now. No one is going to come here." Remember that at this point no one knew for sure how many people were in the towers that morning, but some estimates were that as many as 30,000 people could have been inside when the planes hit. Peter said, "Cynthia, it’s too early for this. When I come to you on the air, don’t report this. People won’t be able to absorb it yet." It was such a human judgment, such a correct one. Jennings was at his best throughout. Wise, calm, insightful. I was proud to be a small part of ABC’s coverage of 9/11 for which I am happy to say we won a DuPont Award.

What else do I remember?

The dozens and dozens of people who came up to me when they’d see the camera, begging me to help them find their loved ones. One young woman stands out. She was 17 and had a ten-year-old and a seven-year-old with her. It was September 12. Her mother was in the first tower. High up. Their father was not in their lives. She pushed through the barriers as we were live on "Good Morning America," sobbing, "What am I supposed to do? She was all we have." As I struggled not to speak, Charlie Gibson said quietly, a catch in his voice, "It’s OK to cry Cynthia, hug her for us."

The cop who hugged me at Ground Zero and said, "None of us must ever forget this."

Going to the home of a firefighter who wasn’t supposed to be working that day, but insisted on going to the scene. Keeping his mass card on our refrigerator. Spencer, then three, calling him "our fireman." The sad eyes of his widow and children.

What do I remember?

Staggering home after several days to find Spencer standing on the living-room sofa with a towel serving as a cape, "Mommy, I am Superman and I am going to save those people."

Liz Smith

Liz Smith | 09/11/2008 12:00 am

Liz Smith on the Day America Lost Its Innocence

What I carry in my heart is remembering watching out my windows on East 38th Street, looking downtown as the first tower smoked and burned, as the second tower was struck before my very eyes and as both crumbled and fell. And then the ghostly hordes of people covered with ash trudging uptown below me on Third Avenue. I don’t need them to build any memorial to 9/11. It remains omnipresent every day of my life, the day America lost its innocence.

Click here on this text to read my New York Post column.

 

Joan Juliet Buck

Joan Juliet Buck | 09/11/2008 12:00 am

Joan Juliet Buck's Impossible Nightmare

Standing in the living room of my neighbor’s house in Santa Fe, watching the planes over and over again, trying to believe it has happened. Was happening. Impossible. And then Pennsylvania? The Pentagon? Watching until the sight turned into pornography — again and again the planes going into the towers, then the white smoke, the death, the helplessness. The bottom falling out of certainty. Remembering Sandy Berger at a conference that March, as he sat on the stage, telling us: “There will be a terrorist attack on the United States.” And we all shivered a little and thought he was being dramatic. It was impossible. Who knew then that those words were not so much dramatic as irresponsible? If he had known, others knew. And why had no fighters intercepted the planes? Why was no one protecting us? And the strange feeling of being so far away from all that, just a watcher.

After hours of watching the impossible nightmare, sitting at a table in a hotel garden with one of my oldest friends when the cell rings. It’s my second oldest friend, to say “Berry was on the first plane.” Berry, the happiest person anyone ever knew. Mind going to Berry’s last hour on earth, in the sky, in — as I later learned and will never forget — seat 19A. What did she see, feel, live through as that plane screeched over Manhattan? How ultimate the fear, how total the dread? What can that have been like? Were they screaming? Did she stay calm? I know she must have prayed. Hard. She wore a ring with a crucifix on it. Many weeks later, that ring was found in the rubble. Because I knew her and loved her, it is Berry — sitting in 19A in circumstances of total horror — that I will never forget. Ever.




Joan Ganz Cooney

Joan Ganz Cooney | 09/11/2008 12:00 am

Joan Ganz Cooney: The Sadness and the Stillness

I carry the sadness, the sense of enormous tragedy and loss and the stillness of that day and the days immediately following. Of course, there was a great amount of noise from fire engines and fighter planes overhead but it was still, nonetheless. My husband was abroad and was unable to get home. Oddly, I liked being alone, and sort of resented phone calls from outside New York that intruded on the trance-like state I was in. Peter Jennings on ABC News was my only company and that was the way I wanted it. On day two, I went to St. Patrick’s Cathedral and for the first time in years, I lit a candle and prayed. All I could think about were the dead, especially the police and firefighters but, of course, all those trapped civilians too.

Finally I came to on Friday and called my friend Liz Smith and said, "We’re going out to lunch. I have a car." She protested that she looked terrible and wasn’t dressed. I practically shouted, "Get dressed; I’m on my way." At the restaurant we talked and talked about the horror that had happened and about what might be coming. But we also laughed for the first time since Tuesday morning. A few days later, I went to our fire station which had lost several men on 9/11 to make a donation and as I handed the envelope to a firefighter I burst into tears and said nothing.

Candice Bergen

Candice Bergen | 09/11/2008 12:00 am

Candice Bergen: A City Holds Its Collective Breath

I will never forget the perfection of the weather on that day. And then after the towers fell, the eerie silence of the city, punctuated only by sirens and the screech of fighter jets crisscrossing overhead. Otherwise, just a city holding its collective breath. Then that evening, the spontaneous memorials that appeared on the sidewalks outside of apartment buildings where a resident has perished. Candles and flowers and photos. The doormen holding candles in tribute. And the shift in spirit of people in the city. The reaching out, the connection, the sharing of emotions beyond any of our experience. The intensity of emotions. The intensity of patriotism. The heavy sense of threat that hung over Manhattan. The persistent dread of attending a large gathering of people. A sporting event, say, or the theater.

The realization that on this island we are fish in a barrel. Utterly trapped with no exit possibility. Then three weeks later, going down to Ground Zero to serve food with my daughter and husband as volunteers and seeing the fire still burning. The molten core. The eyes of the firemen and rescue teams that were hollow and haunted. And the constant surprise in seeing the depth of people’s nobility and courage and caring. Often from those from whom you would least expect it.

Julia Reed

Julia Reed | 09/11/2008 12:45 pm

Julia Reed on the Extraordinary Heroism of Ordinary Americans

On 9/11, which is, alas, my birthday, I was in New York about to head to Nashville to attend a 70th birthday party for George Jones (which I figured would be better than any party I could throw for myself). Before I left, though, I had promised a close friend I’d have breakfast at the St. Regis with an older friend of hers in town from Mexico City. I was in a cab in the usual slow Fifth Avenue traffic, and at a light, both the driver and I saw the fireball at the top of the first tower. (I hadn’t realized until that moment how very visible both towers were from points all over Manhattan.) He rolled down his window and another driver told us he was hearing on the radio that a small plane had flown into it.

A bit rattled, I went into the hotel dining room and met this lovely genteel woman. Halfway through my second cup of coffee, a friend rang my cell to tell me about the Pentagon. At that point I knew we weren’t talking about a small plane anymore. I told my uncomprehending breakfast companion to go back to her room, that her husband would be watching CNN in Mexico and he would want to reach her.

When I got outside there was no traffic on Fifth Avenue, even that far up (53rd Street). Cars had pulled over, people were listening to their radios, pedestrians crowded the streets. I began walking, fast, back uptown, toward home. I was trying to dial my then-boyfriend, now-husband in New Orleans to find out what the hell was happening (I figured he’d know a lot more than I did from TV) when a man grabbed my arm and spun me around and the two of us stood there holding onto each other as the tower literally disappeared before our eyes.

Every time I think of that moment my heart is in my throat again. It’s that feeling of watching something so, so much bigger than you or anything you’ve ever seen before and somehow comprehending the urgency and sheer awfulness of it even though there are no words. I will never forget that man, my brief companion.

When I got back uptown, without even thinking I went straight to my butcher and bought two enormous tenderloins (this is my mother in me — when something horrible happens or somebody dies, she cooks a tenderloin). When I got home, friends began pouring in and we sat glued to the TV (it was Peter Jennings — as Cynthia said, he was pitch-perfect that day). At one point I left the apartment to get something — cigarettes probably, as all of us reformed smokers were suddenly puffing away — and the sidewalks were full of families with dogs and baby strollers spilling out of cafés. I realized that like me, they were desperate for communion with other folks, to cling to normalcy (even though nothing was remotely normal), to somehow reiterate the fact that they were still alive.

There were cops everywhere and at my corner, 78th and Third Avenue, a couple of them were stopping crosstown traffic so that a fire truck carrying a crew returning from the rubble could get through. The men were soot-covered and stone-faced and a huge flag flew from the top of the engine. Hundreds of people were suddenly quiet and it was the first time I really cried. That’s what stays with me: the flag, our flag, and the extraordinary heroism of ordinary Americans doing their jobs that day. 

Read more about: 9/11, History, Terrorism

247 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

Mugsy Peabody
I was up all night working with a young man who, when the first plane hit, we went on working, thinking it was an accident. When the second plane hit, we looked at each other, then moved quickly to the elevator, not wanting to be 20 stories up in a high rise. It would be more than a week before we saw each other again, since the United States essential shut down for that week. What I will always remember is knowing what was coming, not the “terrorists,” but that we would proceed to destroy ourselves from within. I liked our subsequent behavior to that of a rape victim, suffering post-traumatic stress disorder. And I fully agree with what Susan Sontag, writing in The New Yorker, memorably said: “The disconnect between last Tuesday’s monstrous dose of reality and the self-righteous drivel and outright deceptions being peddled by public figures and TV commentators is startling, depressing. The voices licensed to follow the event seem to have joined together in a campaign to infantilize the public. Where is the acknowledgment that this was not a “cowardly” attack on “civilization” or “liberty” or “humanity” or “the free world” but an attack on the world’s self-proclaimed superpower, undertaken as a consequence of specific American alliances and actions? How many citizens are aware of the ongoing American bombing of Iraq? And if the word “cowardly” is to be used, it might be more aptly applied to those who kill from beyond the range of retaliation, high in the sky, than to those willing to die themselves in order to kill others. In the matter of courage (a morally neutral virtue): whatever may be said of the perpetrators of Tuesday’s slaughter, they were not cowards. “Our leaders are bent on convincing us that everything is O.K. America is not afraid. Our spirit is unbroken, although this was a day that will live in infamy and America is now at war. But everything is not O.K. And this was not Pearl Harbor. We have a robotic President who assures us that America still stands tall. A wide spectrum of public figures, in and out of office, who are strongly opposed to the policies being pursued abroad by this Administration apparently feel free to say nothing more than that they stand united behind President Bush. A lot of thinking needs to be done, and perhaps is being done in Washington and elsewhere, about the ineptitude of American intelligence and counter-intelligence, about options available to American foreign policy, particularly in the Middle East, and about what constitutes a smart program of military defense. But the public is not being asked to bear much of the burden of reality. The unanimously applauded, self-congratulatory bromides of a Soviet Party Congress seemed contemptible. The unanimity of the sanctimonious, reality-concealing rhetoric spouted by American officials and media commentators in recent days seems, well, unworthy of a mature democracy. “Those in public office have let us know that they consider their task to be a manipulative one: confidence-building and grief management. Politics, the politics of a democracy—which entails disagreement, which promotes candor—has been replaced by psychotherapy. Let’s by all means grieve together. But let’s not be stupid together. A few shreds of historical awareness might help us understand what has just happened, and what may continue to happen. “Our country is strong,” we are told again and again. I for one don’t find this entirely consoling. Who doubts that America is strong? But that’s not all America has to be.”
By Mugsy Peabody on 09/11/2008 12:21 am
rocky rocky
Some truth. Thank you, Ms. Peabody.
By rocky rocky on 09/11/2008 12:32 am
phyllis Doyle Pepe
Mugs: You and I have had a brief discussion before re: Sontag’s piece and what still curdles my cream is what a lot of flak she got for saying what she did. That last sentence says it all.
By phyllis Doyle Pepe on 09/11/2008 8:21 am
DeBúrca obj
I agree Mugsy. And it gives me chills to think of it. I was in Ireland when 9/11/01 happened and I saw a side most Americans did not. First of all, the Irish people amazed me with their outpouring of sympathy towards the US. I saw lines of people, even women pushing strollers, wrapped around the US Embassy waiting hours just to sign books of condolensce. I attended a memorial service at a local Catholic church and it was so full that the aisles and back had people standing crunched together. Can you imagine the people of US reacting like this over something that happened in another country? These people truly cared. And the news coverage at the beginning was so supportive of the US, I even remember seeing crowds in the streets of Iran in support of the US and protesting the terrorist attack! It was amazing the coverage in the newspapers and the feeling throughout Europe and even the Middle East that we as a civilized society must band together and not allow such behavior. Then I started to see Bush on TV wearing a cowboy hat and saying things like “bring it on” and slowly the coverage started to change, people became unsettled and nervous about how the US was reacting. Then when I returned home in August of ‘02 I didn’t recognize my country. There were flags everywhere, in a sort of aggressive “patriotism” that didn’t feel right. And people I knew seemed actually afraid to talk out loud about anything that was in disagreement with what the Bush administration was doing and saying and even what their fellow citizens were saying. I actually saw people look from side to side and lower their voices when expressing an opinion. And not one person I spoke to here seemed to have any idea just how much the world and Europe in particular had been at our side over this attack. It was sickening to hear the bashing of France, “freedom fries” etc, and the talk about “old” Europe not mattering anymore. Although I am not a highly religious person and don’t like to bring God into things, I do believe, with the help of George W. Bush and the people around him, the US squandered an opportunity from God, the Universe, whatever, for the whole world to unite after 9/11. So to me, as horrible as the actual terrorist attack was, what has happened since then in increments within this country and in our relationship to the world and the death and destruction caused by our invasion and occupation in Iraq, has been equally as devastating, if not more so, than what happened on that September day.
By DeBúrca obj on 09/11/2008 10:01 am
Mugsy Peabody
DeBurca, I thank you for this, and God Bless the irish. Long may they wave!
By Mugsy Peabody on 09/11/2008 11:12 am
No Kill and Drill Palin
De B- The world was with us. Chirac said “We’re all New Yorkers now.” The news coverage of people in major capitals in long lines as you described. I remember all the scary rhectoric, the deliberate use of fear “You’re with us or against us….we’ll smoke ‘em out of their caves.” All the two-bit phony cowboyism from someone who is afraid of horses. In that time of super-heated fear and patriotism Obama made his speech in public, on tape against going to war—stating why and all the repercussions that would ensue and which subsequently happened as he predicted. On Feb 15th 2003 I was part of the global wide 80 million people marching in capital streets all over the world, millions in Rome, Madrid, throughout the Middle East, Oceania, the US….San Francisco was wall to wall with marchers. It barely made the MSM. It was exciting because I believed we would stop this inhumane, illegal, and immoral ‘Halliburton-Exxon War’ from happening. Then on Mar 18, 2003 that sickening ‘Shock and Awe.’ How collectively deranged and sick does a group of men have to be to sit around and plan an overwhelming attack on an urban city of 5M, 50% under 15, and call it “rolling out a new product in the fall and KNOWING as the Bush administration KNEW [as did those of us with working brains] that Saddam [Rumsfelds former goody buddy and Halliburton’s good customer] had nothing to do with 911. They programmatically stired up the fervor. All of this done by calculate design and in writing that anyone could read [i.e. news organizations] in the Project for the New American Century signed by Cheney, and all of the Neocons in 1998 stating exactly what would happen. Going into Iraq, removing Saddam, installing 14 permanent US bases [we also built the largest US Embassy in the history of the world] and in the PNAC the words that this could not happen, the American public would not go for it, without a “New Pearl Harbor.’ When golfer Patrick Stewart’s Lear Jet went off course over rural western America and did not respond to air traffic control calls, within minutes US jets were alongside, filming, the film exists. Hundreds of times a year US military jets deploy anytime a plane goes 15% off it’s vector and does not respond to air traffic control. WDC and NYC are the most guarded airspace in the world. My husband was a naval pilot before he completed grad school and eventually became a CEO, his brother was in charge of training all United airline pilots, I’ve seen in real time just how effective the US military at that when once sitting at lunch at a oceanside restaurant in Salem, MA I saw a strange looking black jet in an otherwise bright and empty blue vista and then suddenly two US military jets appearing out of nowhere flying alongside the strange jet, criss crossing in front of it and waving their wings. This was the day Anwar Sadat was killed and the 4 male stockbrokers I was with from the local EF Hutton office said “happens all the time…its a Russian MIG straffing the coast.” To believe the offical story, one needs to believe that a regular action that happens hundreds of times a year, in the most technologically advanced military in history, with jets parked on the tarmac within minutes of the Pentagon, with the Bush administration knowing there were hijacked air craft menandering in our skies in a circuitous route for over an hour—no jets were deployed. Cheney was in charge at that time of military excercises that precisely duplicated what was happening in real time. The “Commander in Chief’ of our US forces sat reading ‘My Pet Goat’ to schoolchildren knowing that our main cities were under attack, that our national iconic buildings had been hit, that our citizens were roasting to death. He did nothing. Hitler burned the Reichstag as a pretext for declaring himself all powerful, to stir up fear [the most blinding force there is] and to start a phony war that eventually killed 70 million people, most of them innocent civilians. Republicans are ‘fall in line people.” They do not question; when questioning is the basic duty of every citizen. We have no real news, we have attractive puppets working ultimately for multinationals like GE that builds bombs and also owns NBC. This phony war and been a gusher for folks like them. McCain is even more of a gun happy war mongering thoughtless fool than Bush, as if that were possible.—he voted with him 90% of the time. Exxon et al will say “do this” and his response will effectively be ‘yessire.’ Republicans have an opportunity to really think, to really investigate and try to draw connections, to care more about the planet and the people and the real America that was great because she was good and was turned into a terrorist, rogue nation by GWB/Cheney and the NeoCons not just to get control of Iraq, but to establish geopolitical control of the entire Middle East, ie look at a map of what countries ring the Caspian Sea that has 33% more oil than Alaska. The US has puppets in most Middle East nations and want them in Iran and Syria too. This does not make us secure, it makes us hated. Former U.S. Marine Major General Smedley Butler, one of 19 to be twice awarded the Medal of Honor wrote ‘War is a Racket.” He wrote how he was nothing but a muscle man for US coporations and that there is nothing as profitable to them as war. None are so blind that will not see, there are consequences to hedgemony and they will be for our children and grandchildren. Imperialist nations have always been the source of their own demise. From 9/11 onward observing the programmed hysteria, the ripping away of everything I’ve loved about America and what has made us great, the unquestioning allegiance of Republicans for their pResident instead of their country and their Constitution, has been like watching the slow and agonizing deathe of the greatest experiment in the history of the world. And now, Republicans are going to vote to continue the horrow show for the rest of us and the rest of the world. And for that they have my total contempt. You vote for it, you’re part of it. The blood is on your hands. Haven’t you destroyed enough? Ever hear of unintended consequences? Blowback? For pete’s sake wake up instead of being a tool of the GOP and making America more a corporatocracy. http://www.lexrex.com/enlightened/articles/warisaracket.htm http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_New_Pearl_Harbor http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7866929448192753501&ei=nEnJSLSnJ… http://www.lexrex.com/enlightened/articles/warisaracket.htm
By No Kill and Drill Palin on 09/11/2008 11:42 am
Susan B
I read every word, Suzanne. No one can doubt your love for this country. You are already grieving, but the patient may still live. I know you’ve fought hard for a very long time, but please don’t throw in the towel quite yet. We need you.
By Susan B on 09/11/2008 6:13 pm
True Taylor
I am a big fan, Suzanne. Your posts are clear, intelligent, well thought out, well documented and researched. And I think you are both brave and brilliant.
By True Taylor on 09/12/2008 4:11 pm
phyllis Doyle Pepe
And, unfortunately, that brave, brilliant woman is no longer on this site. Her passion burned a hole through too many posts, I imagine. I miss her cogent, beautifully constructed, loooooong pieces. I miss, too, her literary acumen and her edginess. I hope she’s in France now with her son and happy.
By phyllis Doyle Pepe on 09/11/2009 11:06 am
Baby  Snooks

Hitler burned the Reichstag as a pretext for declaring himself all powerful, to stir up fear…

___________________________________

 

History will one day record 9/11 as our Reichstag. I have never accepted any of the conspiracy theories but do know as you point out that no plane veers off course in our country without being intercepted. And yet, that day, four did.

I know the Bushes and for years admired them for so many things. Until I realized that while they may not have known about the plan to fly the planes into buildings they did know there were planned hijackings and they did not issue any sort of alert to the airlines which might have prevented what happened.  They intended for the airplanes to be hijacked which is why the airplanes were not intercepted.  They thought it would be a simple matter of rescuing the passengers on the tarmacs once the airplanes landed and at that point would have the justification for their "war on terror" which was really just a continuation of the "war for oil" the Bushes started a long time ago.  The word evil comes to mind. And always will. 

And it a war so many others were complicit in along the way. Including the Clintons.  I remember how Madeline Albright commented that the deaths of 500,000 Iraqi children were "worth it" and realize the deaths of 500,000 American children would be "worth it" as well. The American people became complicit as well when we did not pause to wonder why so manhy around the world to celebrate rather than mourn that day. We are, despite our pain and our protest of innocence, a shameful nation.   We have learned nothing.  We have become what we always fought. 

By Baby Snooks on 09/11/2009 7:34 am
Scarlett Ohara Mitchell
I am sorry Baby Snooks, but try as I might, I can not wrap my mind around the idea that ANYONE, much less the President of the United States knew of this plan ahead of time and just allowed these lives to be put at risk. I’m sorry I just can’t go there.
By Scarlett Ohara Mitchell on 09/11/2009 8:09 pm
Baby  Snooks
It is documented fact that he did. He did nothing. No warnings issued to anyone. Not the airlines. Not the airports. That has nothing to do with conspiracy theories. It has to do with documented fact.
By Baby Snooks on 09/11/2009 8:19 pm
Rachel F

LOL, right. And it’s documented fact that we never landed on the moon, but just made those stories up to scare the Soviets. Oh, and did I mention the government cover-up of the UFO’s? That’s documented fact, too. And so many other things that are "documented" and "fact"…

/sarc

By Rachel F on 09/11/2009 11:54 pm
Baby  Snooks
Obviously you’re one of those who wouldn’t accept documented fact if Moses went back up on the mountain and God etched the documented fact into stone.
By Baby Snooks on 09/12/2009 9:11 am
Rachel F
Sorry, Snooks, but I only accept "facts" that are really facts…not a bunch of bs conspiracy theories spun by lunatics and political extremists for self-serving purposes.
By Rachel F on 09/12/2009 9:41 pm