Question of the Day | 04/18/2008 12:00 am

What do men not know about women?

Read more about: Esquire Magazine, Relationships

405 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

K B —- Through the years as a single person, I discovered that some people are apt to be with someone, while some others , like myself , live by oneself. Because people like me, the older I get , the more of being myself is necessary. I would not trade in my freedom for compromises. Now, that is only my thinking—- I am not, and also would not be qualified to speak for others. “Do you want to grow old with some one?” The answer I found out for myself some time ago is negative. I have slept with approximately 45 in my life , but I could only find peace within myself alone these days—- Not that I don’t want to be with someone, it is a question of my not qualified to play a significant role of this any more! Do I not know about women??? Frankly, I do not even know myself most of the time! These days I go out dancing as much as I can, and came home alone. Since I did not expect anything beforehand, therefore I did not get disappointed afterwards. Again, I want to grow old with someone—- so far no one wants to grow old with me! And I do not want to grow old with most of the women I have met. My attractiveness is getting down from high down to almost nothing. And I know it!—-dancewu(dot)net

By GEORGE WU, A.I.A. on 04/20/2008 4:49 pm

e-mail alert

George, I feel bad not replying before now and am not sure you will see this but here goes. You should never comprimise and you are right some people do not have some one to grow old with. I reassure my daughter who is beautiful but has not found that special person that it is aways best to be single and happy then married and unhappy -so do not compromise. She could have been married had she wished to settle but that is never good. I may sound a little ambivelent but you are not cynical against women and therefore no doors are closed. Please coninue to go out dancing. This is one thing I can guarantee you that most women like in a man. If you like dancing , take lessons, whether you need them or not. I can bet there will be more women than men there. I hope you dance right into the heart of some wonderful women.

By K B on 04/22/2008 7:30 am

e-mail alert

Ah, shucks, Mark–––go suck an egg.

By phyllis Doyle Pepe on 04/18/2008 10:33 am

e-mail alert

MK The only woman who would have sex with a fire breathing misogynist like you is a unfortunate dimwit. Attractive, intelligent, sexy, accomplished women can spot a misogynist a mile away. They don’t give men like you a limp one finger handshake. On the RARE occasion their JERK-DAR is off the second it kicks back you’re cut-off at the knees and gone. WHICH makes me think of the one thing MOST men don’t really know. Don’t believe the myths of shows like Sex in the City…they are entertainment [although I’m the one person in America apparently who hasn’t seen it]. The women you would want as partners, do not regard their lives and their bodies as a carnival ride. They can wait for the really good guy knowing that better to be truly in love for a year than sit across from someone, ‘committed,’ [self-imprisoned] and with nothing to say. There’s an infinite number of purposeful things to do on this planet. No smart woman’s existence revolves around any man who doesn’t enrich it. I’ve done my anthropological research by having work that brought me in contact with tens of thousands of men of all stripes across the US. From the guys in the boiler rooms to the chairmans of the boards—you’re not a smart guy.

By Buh-Bye Hillary Hillary Buh-Bye on 04/18/2008 12:03 pm

e-mail alert

Suzanne—Hate to burst your bubble. My outlook attracts some very high level professional feminist icon types who long for someone to safely uncork their fantasy and imaginative lives disguised in real life by playing the aggressor in public.

By MARK KLEIN, M.D. on 04/18/2008 12:59 pm

e-mail alert

Klein “playing the aggressor in public” characterize responding to nimcompooery with any perjorative you wish. I do not let hate speech of any kind stand. As for the rest of your comment…yes, we all saw what a ‘diamond’ Spitzer’s ‘high class’ whore was [an oxymoron if ever there was one] and know that men who are so repressed and repressive that they have secret lives: The Senator Vittner’s who need to be diapered by prostitutes, the Senator Craig’s who find sexual partners in pubic bathrooms, the fellows like you who meet their female counterparts on Craigslist and must believe they are women of some cachet to sanctify their own twisted ness. The President of the US is a sociopath..so using position is no maker ever of anything being the norm, OK, a standard, etc.

By Buh-Bye Hillary Hillary Buh-Bye on 04/18/2008 1:53 pm

e-mail alert

Suzanne de: Sprayed my water when I came to “nimcompooery”.

By Kay Sara on 04/18/2008 2:10 pm

e-mail alert

I loved that too. Suzanne, you got passion.

By Frannie Em on 04/19/2008 6:35 pm

e-mail alert

Nimcompoory is such a fine word. And it sooo fits. There is no enlightening this so called Doctor. Just be grateful he isn’t treating anyone you know or care about and look forward to the time when he will be represented in an anthropological study subject in High School under ancient discredited mythology.

By Alyn C on 04/21/2008 2:11 pm

e-mail alert

Suzanne—It’s women who are the clueless ones. Male sexuality shot through with fantasy is by its nature highly idiosyncratic . Women seduce by implied fantasy fulfillment expressed through alluring clothes and undies but once they’ve landed their guy haven’t clue about how to keep him really happy. The last thing on most guy’s minds in the sack is his romance with the lady. He’s off in a fantasy usually driven by the intense pleasure it produces.

By MARK KLEIN, M.D. on 04/18/2008 4:09 pm

e-mail alert

Clarify: “From the guys in the boiler rooms to the chairmans of the boards—you’re not a smart guy.” Mark Klein is not a smart guy….I’m most not on board the men are bad and women are saints train.

By Buh-Bye Hillary Hillary Buh-Bye on 04/18/2008 3:35 pm

e-mail alert

I feel that you have read my mind. The best sex for me is when I can get it and not have to get up and cook breakfast. In a personal survey I have concluded that MOST men get very nervous when you treat them as if you can live without them. I would love to find a man that would enjoy an evening out, a little friskiness, and then leave.

By Maggi D on 04/18/2008 2:43 pm

e-mail alert

Maggie—- A young lady told me years ago,” If you buy me breakfast; I will go home with you.” That turned out to be a one-night stand. The sex was so-so, and I never saw her again.—- dancewu(dot)net

By GEORGE WU, A.I.A. on 04/20/2008 5:16 pm

e-mail alert

Dear Dr Strangelove — why does your supposed anthropological research compel you to muddy the waters and provoke the subjects of your study as you do — where did you learn how to do science ?

By Michael Salling on 04/19/2008 4:22 am