I have a coworker who, because she does Facebook, claims she has over 200 friends. No one has that many friends who really matter. I have three friends from my childhood, long, long ago, with whom I keep in touch. I am fine being alone, and see my boyfriend on weekends, but speak to him often during the week. I am lonely only when I have something exciting to talk about and cannot find anyone in my small circle. When I have time alone I ignore dishes, laundry, etc. and read, prowl museums, try to relax. I find it difficult to relax.

Kermit, put pictures of what you would look like relaxing in your “home” treasure-mapping book.

Being left alone for a few days? Doesn’t really apply. Apart from a few years married, and a few years at most with each of a handful of lovers, I’ve always lived alone by choice. It hasn’t always been me who ended the relationships, but usually. Right, marriage isn’t for everyone. Sounds like many people here who are with someone, don’t want to be. Society trains us to think we’re supposed to want to.

I use to be alone because of childhood trauma and not knowing who to trust and who was safe. I find that I need solitude because I talk all day for a living. I need at least two or three hours and then I can be with the world. Lately I crave a more intimate relationship with a man. I crave to share myself emotionally, spiritually, intellectually and physically. I believe it will come along and I have a lot of patience.

I’m an only child so I guess I had was forced to get use to being alone, but I did it. I draw, listen to music, watch American and British Sitcoms, and read biographies and history books. But sometimes it does have it’s problems because when I’m around people I either have a hard time talking to them or I end up wanting to be around them a lot. So sometimes I do like to be alone, but some times it feels so solitary.

I love to be alone from time to time to write, read and bake! But then I enjoy just being around my husband of almost 23 years. We enjoy each other’s company and just eating popcorn or talking or watching a movie together is fun. Also we love to go to the different ponds and rivers and ocean and walk .Time for yourself is great and time with each other is also good. Love to be with my girlfriends as well, talking!

I don’t ever feel like I’m doing enough with my time, but if I’m not alone I don’t get anything done. My nest has been empty for nearly a decade, and sometimes I do feel like I’m at loose ends, but I’m startin’ to groove on it. I don’t really date. In fact, the closest thing to any kind of ritual I indulge in is “honoring the passing seasons in my home decor.” The wreaths and the silks and the knick knacks come and go throughout the year. Most recently, the shamrocks were replaced by tulips, the leprauchauns with chicks and ducks and bunnies…not too cutesy, but enough so my eyes are content wherever they may fall. It all cycles in and out of the closets. Other than that, I have my dog and my lists and absolute discretion about where and how I’ll invest my time and energy. I may not be alone for the rest of my life, but right now, it’s pretty sweet.

As a member of the Borg (LOL-Trekkie reference) I don’t prefer being alone. I never admitted that before. Again the paradox in me is that I fight to have alone time constantly. People (family, co-workers etc.) are always present. And I’m always picking up something from someone… So when I’m alone to myself it feels real good for a while then it starts to feel bad- I guess that’s loneliness.

I am alone for 50% of my week. I feel lonely when my son is gone as the house seems empty. I enjoy that empty when the times are rushed and we have to move at the speed of light as it seems. I spend the first part of the first day, trying to come down from the frenzy of kid schedules. Then after the third day, I miss him so…The tidying his room and touching his toys so….But, it makes the time when he returns from so good. I work from home, so I write and write and write. If it is a long seperation of a week or so, I schedule a lunch with a girlfriend and a trip to the beach or a long bike ride of 20 miles or so. I miss the companionship of a man more, when my son is gone. A different kind of lonely. One that is emphasized or more pronounced when he is not here. There is a vast difference in being alone vs. lonely. “You can be lonely, yet never be alone. You can be alone and never be lonely.” I don’t mind being alone, it can be a relief not to be needed or on a treadmill of life. I do mind being lonely…..i am thankful for my friends, with them I am never lonely or alone!

I probably overindulge. I enjoy solitude. I can occupy myself any number of ways, from reading and writing to baking and making music or just dancing to it. I like to go for long walks. Since I naturally walk faster than most of my friends, this is a way I can walk at my own pace. Then there are ways to technically be by yourself but enjoy the company of others, like the internet, long phone calls, even reading is not truly a lonely pursuit, because the voice of the author is winging around your neurons, lighting things up. There are not many times then where I have been utterly alone, without something to read or listen to. But when I have, I have enjoyed it. Still I am not a hermit. I really enjoy the company of other people. I just enjoy my own as well.

This if funny, a little while ago my husband asked me if I wanted to get rid of him this weekend. I think he was trying to use reverse psychology on me instead of hang in there with me and get the vegetables in.

Although I love people and very much enjoy being part of a group, I cherish time alone……………solitude, peace, time to ponder the ins and outs of life, time to read, to listen to music, to revel in the natural surroundings of field and forest wherein a surprise lurks around every corner, time to just love being lucky me, i.e., old but alive, walking, physically strong and mentally alert. Got a whole lot to be happy about!!!!!

I love people time but alone time makes me better company to others later. My best alone time was a 400 mile trip in an rv over 4 days. I read 5 books, stopped and napped when I felt like it, saw some beautiful scenery and met some real characters in small hole-in-the-wall diners and restaurants. I got home and told my husband I wanted a divorce. I think alone time helps us to think more clearly.

My wife left me six years before she served me with the divorce paper. let me see—- that is 30 years, I lived alone for thirty years, not a few days! I survived very well. What do I do with the time? At the beginning I was very lonely, every day when I went back to the same empty house. Before the divorce, I was hoping that she would come back to me one day….. But the day we were in the court room for the last time, we embraced each other in front of the judge and I found myself crying. All I said to her when she suggested our last lunch together,” I hope you can improve yourself.” It took me all the years until only recently, I begin to have different perspective about the divorce—- I found myself finally accepting my divorce. These days I worked on the computer every day on my ten books of Ten International Ballroom Dances,since 1992, which are almost finished; I Design prototype housing over the highways, provided that I could solve the objection of the noise, the fume, and the vibration problems. If I have some authority appreciating what I have been trying to do, I will be building ” GREAT WALL VILLAGE” all over the railroads, expressways in China. And no need to take farm lands to build housing anymore. And I am also doing my GRAPHIC AUTOBIOGRAPHY. All these have been keeping me very busy.—-no time to pity myself.———dancewu(dot)net

I love being with people. I love being alone. When my company offered to allow people to work at home part of the week, I declined…I need the socialization that comes with going to the office. On the other hand, when I get time alone, I feel as if I’ve received a wonderful gift. I’ve always been very introverted; even as a child I could entertain myself for hours. Alone is when I recharge and appreciate just being myself.