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Question of the Day | 10/21/2008 12:00 am

Thomas Edison invented a workable electric light in his Edison, NJ, lab on this date in 1879. What is your brightest invention?

Light Bulb
© iStock
Liz Smith

Liz Smith | 10/21/2008 12:00 am

Liz Smith's Ongoing Attempt at Perfection

Why, myself, of course! I have been trying to perfect this inaccurate and sometimes befuddled mechanism for 85 years and I think what with still working at a good clip – writing my syndicated entertainment gossip column, working on six or seven of New York’s biggest charities, appearing on air for Fox Entertainment News, helping found and contributing to the wOw website and being in the middle of writing a novel about life after death in the style (I hope) of the late Joseph Heller – well, I think I am ready for mass production.

Click here on this text to read my New York Post column.

41 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

Ro H
Way back in the 60’s I came up with the idea for the rear windshield wipers. I thought, if they can put them in front why not in the back of the vehicle as well. I never did pursue it, however. Tsk! tsk! I often come up with ideas, schemes, inventions I would like to see made possible - I simply don’t have the proper mechanical drawing expertise, electrical engineering knowledge, and so on. I am an ‘idea’ person - mentally I picture how it would work, look, etc., but… alas, no $$$ to pursue the projects further. I did approach an idea, invention group… only to find out they were just in it for the money - I would pay THEM to make the project happen. (No thank you). It was for the mfg. of neck, shoulders, upper back electrical pulsation to prevent migraines, neck aches, and shoulder tension, while working on computers all day long. Since I already gave them the details and info. on plans for this project, I am certain it is already on the market somewhere. I have another idea, brewing now, but… if I share it, someone else will profit off it, and run with it, and… well, I don’t know who to trust before an idea of mine is copyrighted, or patented. Or, what procedure is necessary to accomplish such a fete. I am open to ideas and someone who may have the where with all to accomplish the task.
By Ro H on 10/21/2008 12:21 am
Frannie Em
Recently it was a doggy potty on my friend’s balcony. I planted it with grass and everything, and easy for her boyfriend to change. She is going through chemo and has an older dog who can’t get down the stairs easy, and she can’t carry him, so walla. I used all sorts of odd things to put it together. Took one of my old large dog houses and cut it down to just a pan. Put a layer of doggy gravel in the bottom (it is an oder eater, and pulls in moisture). On top of that I put a swamp cooler filter that will hold moisture, a little mulch and then the sod. Got a sod that could deal with a doggy. It took him a few days to “get it”, and in a few weeks we will change the sod. Hopefully it will be a long term fix. We shall see. Later she got a catalogue that had something kind of like it in it, but mine was made with love ;-) I like Liz’s answer. Liz I think you are just amazing. I want to be doing the same at your age. You give me hope. Thanks for being who you are.
By Frannie Em on 10/21/2008 2:11 am
Emcye Edwards
How great is this? It has the three things I love: kindness innovation organic astro-turf.
By Emcye Edwards on 10/22/2008 1:45 am
Marisa Horn
I used to feel like you, perhaps with age I have given up on trying to have an idea come to fruition. I am now happy to give my ideas away, they are not doing me any good and they are not doing anyone else any good just sitting safely in my head. For me invention/technical or mechanical ideas come verrrry rarely and I do research including patent searches and usually find out that my idea is far from unique or new. :) Once you get a look at the number of similar, and at times the exact same ideas that have already been presented to the patent office it can take some wind out of your sales. Anyway my forte is geared more toward the arts and I am always toying with a book idea. I have a book ready to go right now unfortunately it is not written down :) It is something that I am sure more than half of the people in our country alone have thought of but the great thing about a novel is that you can steer the outcome anyway you want. Speaking about the number of similar ideas you will find circulating the globe reminds me of what I spent the morning doing. I found this worthy of making a “Lens” ( this is the name used to describe a site on Squidoo which is a community that allows you to be creative and to network with thousands of other people. I believe I have done so with 4 …. ) I woke up thinking about something I heard on the Craig Fergesen (sp?) show, “Late Night” ,last night. He was talking to a young guest about music and Pink Floyd became the topic, “Dark Side of the Moon”, one of their albums. I would have to say this album is their greatest achievement by far and after listening to it while watching “The Wizard of Oz” I am just bursting with questions and looking for opinions regarding this curious phenomena. What it comes down to is that in the late 1930’s someone began writing the “Wizard of Oz”. Then in 1939 the movie was put together and became a children’s and family classic. “We’re off to see the Wizard” and all that. Then in 1973 ( seems like a date I have been hearing a lot about lately. I just watched the new TV series “Life on Mars” tonight, it is set in 1973. Well this is just one more freaky coincidence when it comes to the collective thought circulating the world every day. I did not do this with my own hands but have thought about it for years after first hearing about it. If you start the movie “The Wizard of Oz” and the album “Dark Side of the Moon” you end up with an amazing piece of work. I would like anyone with opinions on this matter to put it on my Squidoo lens. I find it hard to believe that these two momentous creations are just a fluke and some unnatural symbiotic relationship. Comments and links welcome http://www.squidoo.com/lensmaster/workshop/PFdarkside This also makes me think about the premise “If you have enough monkeys banging randomly on typewriters, they will eventually type the works of William Shakespeare.” So without further questions about The Dark Side of the Rainbow I can only assume that this is the one time when the aggregated imagination of two different arts crossed in a truly unparalleled manner. Or is it ??? And who caught this little gem of a fact? Maybe after the elections and ‘Joe the Plummer’ is no longer in the eyes of the news media someone will try to find the answer to this nagging question. This is all Craig Fergesen’s fault …. I could be sleeping :) Sorry to get so wordy, I just wanted to say that I love your icon - the crying eye in the sky. Did you do it yourself, art is something that I enjoy immensely. I am a bit of a photographer and just love working with fractal art. I have been really interested in 3D rendering such as the work in your icon but as you mentioned above the lack of funds can put a huge damper on things. I have been adding a wide variety of work to many sites on the net over the years but the finest culmination of my work can be seen on DeviantArt http://kashmier.deviantart.com/

By Marisa Horn on 10/24/2008 2:20 am
Marisa Horn
I just wanted to edit my last post. There is a proper name misspelled, it is not spelled Fergesen. The correct spelling of the name of Late Nights host is Craig Ferguson. …
By Marisa Horn on 10/24/2008 6:29 pm
James the Game
I created a couple of ways of doing radio news in the late 1980’s/early 1990’s that were novel at the time; whether they were original inventions, I couldn’t swear on a Bible. But, as news director at WITL-AM/FM in Lansing, MI., in 1987, I created a custom-casting system whereby I pre-recorded the ABC radio anchor’s newscast ahead of time, and then chopped the newscasts up into segments. I, or another of the anchors at WITL, would read a local story and then punch up the audio of the ABC anchor’s segment, then back to the local anchor, etcetera…basically making it sound like the ABC anchor and the local (WITL) news anchor were in the same room, co-anchoring a newscast. I received some national recognition for that in some trade publications. Ironically, I didn’t like the idea then, and I like it less today! But Chuck Mefford, the late owner of WITL, asked me to devise such a system, so I did. One other thing I did: in 1991, as news director at WMAX in Grand Rapids, I started running the CNN Headline News audio on our airwaves, which was a direct feed back then of the TV signal. That wasn’t unique, but what was, at the time, was us using six-minute cutaways at the end of each half-hour to insert local newscasts. In other words, at the :24 and :54 marks (when CNN HN cut away to entertainment reports), we would break in with local newscasts. That entailed news/traffic/sports and weather casts, feeds of which we received from a local TV station. A lot of stations began doing the same thing in the years that followed, but I was told my one CNN administrator that we were the first in the U.S. I have no idea if that’s true.
By James the Game on 10/21/2008 12:30 am
f p
Brightest invention? Well I’m sure they’d like not to be called inventions but my daughter and my sweetie are the shining in my eyes.
By f p on 10/21/2008 1:07 am
joan larsen
Hi f p — Hey, if you are one of the very fortunates who have two gals who have the power to light up your life and bring that sparkle in your eyes, I’d say you are giving Edison a run for his money!!! So happy for you!!!
By joan larsen on 10/21/2008 10:34 am
f p
Joanee thanks :-) Fortunate? you betcha !
By f p on 10/21/2008 10:48 am
Jeannot Kensinger
You go Frank brighten up the world with shining eyes.!!!
By Jeannot Kensinger on 10/21/2008 10:57 am
f p
gosh Jeannot—thanks so much :-)
By f p on 10/21/2008 11:07 am
Meg InOregon
My husband and I constantly come up with good, innovative, practical ideas for something which is needed, but both of us know the resources needed to build prototypes and go through the patent process, and all of that takes resources that we just don’t have. I am sure that the amount of talent and great ideas that are lost because inventors get no help in the governmental process would amaze us all. It also accounts for why corporations rake in the cash with whatever “stuff” they decide is marketable, because they monpolize the marketplace as patenting is such a high-bar.
By Meg InOregon on 10/21/2008 2:00 am
Julie Runco
That’s so funny you would ask that.. really it’s gosh darn funny. When I have these epiphanies I call them (ask my boys ) “I HAVE A MULTIMILLION DOLLER IDEA !!!!!!” “Now what mom ?….geesh” Hey they all three have said that multimillion idea was silly.. but wait ..Do we not see in restaurants glasses they serve water in also is decorated with or in the glass MIRRORS !!!! so you can check your smile to see if don’t have spinach embedded between your incisors …yes ladies yes … !!! And then there’s your little traveling doggie IV’s so they don’t get dehydrated on the road…Thank you very much. —————— ✂———————✂———————✂———————-✂ So it’s no surprise to them, that I am on a budget. You can save these ideas and if you find a buyer you’ll know where to find me.
By Julie Runco on 10/21/2008 3:00 am
Eener Atrebor
Hmmm…I’ve invented, for lack of a better word, many things. But my all-time best one? I guess my shining moment would have to be the Spitwad Catapult I made for the Invention & Science Fair, when in the sixth grade. It was the sixties, man. Most grade school kids really didn’t have to worry about the gloom and doom they do today! It was made from old-style bamboo chopsticks, rubber bands, tape, paper clips and a plastic thimble I sawed in half and fastened to a piece of leather with well-chewed bubble gum. It had deadly accuracy and could really splat the windows from clear across the other side of the room. I had a male teacher for the very first time in my life. Mr. Wills was really intimidating to me, mainly because he had a jet-black crew cut, black horn-rimmed glasses, and was about six-five. I was really shy, back then, and tended to be a bookish, artsy, quiet loner. It sorta shocked me that he liked my idea. He was very impressed with the whole thing…especially coming from the mind of a girl! SCORE!! My classmates loved it, and they begged me to make them ones, as well. I did, but could never quite duplicate the same success that I had with the original. Perhaps my quiet yet devious, little mind sabotaged the entire operation…heh heh heh…
By Eener Atrebor on 10/21/2008 4:54 am
Chrome Toe
I’ve invented nothing. I suck. I have a step son who is always inventing incredible things in his head. When he was very young it really bothered him that his dad would hunt and kill deer. so he proposed to him that they should design a gun that looked just like a gun but actually only took a picture of the deer and recorded whether or not your “shot” WOULD have killed it. He also invented those fancy headlights that curve with the road before they actually came out on cars. And most recently he’s got this incredible idea for this thing for boats that’s to mechanical for me to describe. The boat thing is so good that i’m trying to encourage him to actually move forward with it.. and he has a lot more “inventions” that just amaze me. he sees the world differently than most.
By Chrome Toe on 10/21/2008 8:20 am