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Home › Relationships

Question of the Day | 10/14/2008 12:00 am

What do people always say to you that drives you crazy?

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Whoopi Goldberg

Whoopi Goldberg | 10/14/2008 12:00 am

How to Drive Whoopi Goldberg Crazy

"You are so articulate."
comments106 Comments
Judith Martin

Judith Martin | 10/14/2008 12:00 am

Judith Martin Is Not a Meter Maid

"I guess I’d better watch how I eat."

"Did I do anything wrong?"

Folks, Miss Manners is not a Meter Maid who runs around spotting violations and issuing tickets. That would be stupendously rude. Besides, if I spent mealtimes checking on whether others can manage to get their food to their mouths in the conventional manner, rather than paying attention to the conversation, I would meanwhile — with perfect manners — be eating poison to escape the boredom. 

comments2 Comments
Joan Ganz Cooney

Joan Ganz Cooney | 10/14/2008 12:00 am

The Skinny on Joan Ganz Cooney

One thing people often say but it makes me laugh — it doesn’t drive me crazy — is, "You look wonderful; you’ve lost weight." I actually have been the same weight since high school but "you’ve lost weight" is many, many people’s idea of a compliment.
comments3 Comments
Liz Smith

Liz Smith | 10/14/2008 12:00 am

What Makes Liz Smith Crazy

Two things: "Got any good gossip" and, "Sorry, that’s off the record!"

Click here on this text to read my New York Post column.

comments1 Comment
Sheila Nevins

Sheila Nevins | 10/14/2008 12:00 am

Sheila Nevins: The Wrong Question

They always say I have the best job in television and that I’m so lucky. 
That truly annoys me because I made it the best job.
Sure, I was lucky to be in the right place at the right time; mostly with the right bosses. 
Nonetheless, many got caught in the quicksand.
I know how to swim in mud and how not to drown. 
I also know who to reach for to pull me out. 
I guess that’s luck.
So, don’t tell me how lucky I am and that I have the best job.   
Ask me how I created the best job.

comments13 Comments
Read more about: Culture, Lifestyle, Manners, Psychology, Society

174 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

The Wine Warrior
Jennifer—‘Fat Bastard’ is the #1 selling French wine in US.
By The Wine Warrior on 10/14/2008 12:04 pm
f p
ROFL
By f p on 10/14/2008 4:19 pm
Marisa Horn
I love the “Mean Kitty Song” Thanks for sharing - have a great time in France
By Marisa Horn on 10/14/2008 8:38 pm
Maggi D
“Wow, you dont look your age!” Does this mean when I DO look my age it is going to be an awful thing? And what is wrong with looking my age? I worked hard to get here - I don’t mind if I look my age.
By Maggi D on 10/14/2008 3:03 am
Donna H
Somebody replying to…well, anything with “There you go.” But the utter, absolute worst is “What you should do is……..” when I haven’t asked for advice.
By Donna H on 10/14/2008 5:30 am
Frannie Em
Donna So true about “What you should do is….” Most of the time the advice is not even prefaced with that. We are now cursed with to much information so everyone has just the right solution to whatever the problem is, when there is no problem. When someone jumps in and starts giving me advice it is like they haven’t heard me at all. I am non-existent, or my abilities to chart my own course are not good enough. Sorry, have done okay so far. Lots of bumps in the road, but hey, that’s life.
By Frannie Em on 10/14/2008 10:40 am
Peggy Sue
Wow, the more I read the more I realize how so many things annoy me! My first reaction to the question is when people as - How long did it take you to paint that painting? My response often is 29 years since I needed to learn how to paint it before I could paint it. Why would it matter how long it took to create anything? Does a writer get asked how long it takes to write the novel? Does it devalue any creative process if it is short time to create it? I am sure my day will be filled with new additions to this thread.
By Peggy Sue on 10/14/2008 5:39 am
georgia fatwood
Hi Peggy and Lily….I just commented on this at Joan’s, I think…In response to compliments as epithets….
By georgia fatwood on 10/14/2008 10:48 am
Vivvy Stewart
The absolute worst that takes all of the self control I can gather is “no problem”. Hey, the proper response to “thank you” is “you’re welcome”, not “no problem”! I could say more, but it would start my day off on the wrong foot just writing about it. Fair warning; one of these days some little twit will utter those words on the day that Jupiter aligns with Mars and I’ll give my speech. Right now, I’m off in search of more coffee and a place of calm and peace.
By Vivvy Stewart on 10/14/2008 7:26 am
georgia fatwood
Hi Vivvy…there, there, dear, just have another cuppa and all may still be well.. I’ll just go on a little ramble while I wait for you to get back. I grew up in a big Southern family…lots of multi-generational womenfolk all of whom had “learned” to deflect any compliment with elaborate self-disparagement. It was a required response. Never “you’re welcome,darlin’” but “Oh this old dress? I’ve had this for years and I think it’s a little droll, don’t you think? I really have been meaning to take it up a bit….” Even as a child I wondered…”well why is she telling that on herself?” It was within very recent memory that I heard someone speak about why we should just say “you’re welcome”….When we deflect the compliment, we unwittingly repel the giver of the compliment….inferring that they are too stupid to realize how old this dress is, etc…. Made sense to me… Still makes me sad that all those women felt obliged to talk down to themselves as a matter of acceptable course. God help the ones who wouldn’t/didn’t.
By georgia fatwood on 10/14/2008 12:03 pm
georgia fatwood
Well I got this backwards, didn’t I? Yipes…it was supposed to be about just saying thank you….Lordy…. Get a compliment, say “thank you”……(not you’re welcome, darlin.)
By georgia fatwood on 10/14/2008 12:08 pm
f p
Whoa! Lily, do people still actually say that? That’s right up there with groovy which I loathed the first time I heard it lol
By f p on 10/14/2008 7:51 am
Frannie Em
Frank Okay, I have to apologize again. I say groovey at times, usually accompanied by some physical humor. It always draws a laugh because it reminds people of their youth. I say it real slow to hit the punch line. You need to get out more and have a few laughs. My laughing buddies are a funny crew. They get it.
By Frannie Em on 10/14/2008 10:55 am
Frannie Em
Lily Do they give a thumbs up when they say it?
By Frannie Em on 10/14/2008 10:57 am
Deni G
Lily, oh dear.. there’s a possibility that I say that sometimes. I’m not positive, but it is possible. the truth is I am liable to say almost anything, including ‘right awn!’ So how much does it bother you? I mean you’ll love me anyway, right? lol

By Deni G on 10/14/2008 11:19 pm
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