I feel really bad for Silda, but she will do what’s right for her. I don’t think I could stay married to a man who would cheat on me with anyone. Not even a $5,000 hooker. My heart breaks for her daughters. They have to face their inquisitive and sometimes mean or nasty peers. Not only that… they still have to call him dad.

I think that Mrs. Spitzer should really take into consideration the fact that her husband not only cheated but was a HYPOCRITE on top of everything else. I think I could personally deal with a liar (just barely) but a hypocrite is even worse. But I agree that even if she stands by her man, she needs to do so privately, because doing so publicly almost makes her seem as if she condones his behavior.

Only she knows what she should do. I think this leaves me with only more questions. What kind of example will this set for her girls if she does stay. How will these girls look at their Mother and at how a healthy relationship is supposed to work? How will this shape the expectations they have for themselves going forward. How will this affect their self esteem? Another question… What are these womans primary drive in standing by their man? Are they literally threatened that if they don’t, their way of life will be compromised? I don’t just mean economically. Is Silda a woman who like many woman, do so much to support their husband goals, lose themselves along the way? Would the men who are involved in these acts stand by their woman if the roles were reversed?

Should Silda Spitzer stand by her man? That is a decision only she can make but, personally, I think she probably should have RUN many years ago. She may be able to forgive his infidelity but how in the world will she ever be able to forgive him for dragging her in front of the cameras during his so called apology as if she shared in the wrong?? It is obvious from his actions that he is a weak and self centered man who didn’t even have the strength to admit his wrongs on his own. Why would she want to stay with someone so emotionally abusive?? This is most likely not the first time he has behaved in such a disgusting way - just the first time he has been caught. What worries me most is that so many weak, self-righteous, self-centered, deceitful, and immoral people keep being elected to positions of power??

No, I do not think she should stand by her man. She wasn’t there when he did the dirty deed. It actually makes her look depressed and sad. What about their three daughters? What if one of them gets pregnant out of wedlock, what would they tell her? She is a high powered attorney, so she should go back to work for a law firm and leave the a__h___. It is amazing how much that hole between a woman’s legs is worth.

I dont know the answer. I just feel bad that anyone has to go through this kind of pain. I hope the media will ease up only because of his wife and children. I know that will not happen, however. I understand it is a story and even a sensational story. I want to move on. He is stepping down and know it would be nice if the matter could be between the two of them.

Truly, none of us can answer this question. It is totally personal. My heart goes out to her and her daughters.

We speak of this as though Mrs. Spitzer has a CHOICE in whether or not she ‘stands by her man’. The political handlers will determine everything about Mrs. Spitzer’s ‘persona’ throughout this entire ordeal: where she will stand, which face she will put on for which press person, what she will wear, where she will go in public, when she will be at his side and when she will stand in the back row….. ad nauseum….. He is a politician and she is a politician’s wife, so what she feels or wishes or is inclined to is a totally moot point. Perhaps LATER, a few years after the ‘scandal’ but not now; right now she will be ‘handled’ and do/look/sound-or-not-sound as she is told.

A question: What if Silda (or any other woman in her place) stood behind her husband and walked out in the middle of his speech?

Mrs. Spitzer will do what in her heart feels right to her and in the end that is what matters. Having said that, I would hang the governor’s “handlers” who take a woman at one of the worst moments of her life - likely too shocked to move - and mold her into what they think is right for the gov. As for the daughters, what is worse: divorced parents or seeing that it’s fine to be thoroughly and publicly humiliated by a man who has professed to love you? Two great questions which I second are: What do you get from a hooker for $5,000 an hour? Why would a man who would spend $5,000 for a few hours of sex be the best choice to balance the budget of New York State?

This kind of sex is not about politics, it’s about power. 99 % of these cases are men stepping out on their wives. Do you imagine free-flowing testosterone has some influence on behavior that lacks rationale, good conscience, or contemplation of consequences? Power and money seem to allow such scenarios, with any men ranking in influence and position. As a politician gains strength and momentum, they become more likely to seek the thrill of adventure and calamity, even with all the risks. Now, if you can come up with a way to lessen the testosterone running rampant in the political world, you’ll make some money. This holds true throughout the world. In some countries they have solved this issue as the leaders (men) take up many wives. One does not question whether they are unfaithful. Should Silda stand by or leave Eliot? You and I are on the outside with, presumably, the strength to tell the jerk to get lost. But this is, sadly, Silda’s decision and her painful decision alone. We can only hope she’s able to find some peace in all of this. On a grander scale we must ask ourselves, are there not more important issues in this world for us at this time? War, losing homes, beating cancer, etc.

Who am I to say what she should or should not do as a wife. I try not to judge or impose shoulds but when it comes to their children, daughters, I find it impossible to remain unjudgemental. How does a mother of three beautiful daughters, tell them by her actions (I am not aware of her private thoughts or conversations) that it is acceptable for your partner in life to be unfaithful and hypocritical. I have a 16 year old daughter and I try to remind her constantly not to settle for less than she deserves, in life and relationships. There are many women that would do well to remember this.

Mr. Spitzer should have made his confession alone. Having his devastated wife with him only enhanced his gilt. Hearing the tape of his rezervations for the evening activities leads one to know this was not his first time out the shoot. How awful for Mrs. Spitzer. If she stays with him, it will never be a totally trusting relationship.

That’s Mrs. Spitzer’s choice. I do not walk in her shoes. However, with that being said, I could not stand with the “man”. How humiliating, how dare him, why does he have a wife. Is this truly a “man thing” to have other women after making a commitment to one? Is their genitals and sex drive so important? Is it connected to their brains, really. I do not understand.

Virginia I agree with you it is about power—that is why I would consider getting my power back by waliking out on his speech. It would slap him and so many others in the face without saying a word. What decision she makes after that is her own and based on her set of variables. And, resoundingly, “YES!” We as Americans should voice our opinion and MOVE ON. There are many more important issues to resolve.