Instead of accompanying her husband yesterday, Mrs. Spitzer should have stated: “I wish to take time to analyze the impact this has for me and the children”. This statement would have given her leverage with regard to his future treatment of her; the statement is now presenting her future and that of her children from a position of strength. Margaret Sisko, RN, COHN-S, CCM

Silda needs to dump Eliot. plain and simple

Anyone who has to call a press conference to address news about his sexual proclivities, such as they are, should be a MAN about it and not drag his wife along to the podium with him for political cover. What a disgrace. The three girls will learn alot over the next few weeks and months by observing their mother’s words and actions as she deals with this situation. Let’s all hope she gets it right for them.

It’s the “For Better or Worse” thing. She stands beside him on the podium for his victory speech when elected, and she stands beside him when he falls.

Have we ever seen a man stand by his woman with the same problem. I DON”T THINK SO…

Her vows are her business, as is where she stands and why. But it has to be HER decision, not Spitzer’s damage control machine.

You’ve got to be kidding! This woman has children with that man. He disregarded his wife, kids, office, voters, State of New York, etc. etc. for illicit sex and illegal behavior. One does not build an ivory tower of that magnitude, surround it with righteousness and then sneak out the back door as it were. Although standing by your man seems to have worked for Mrs. Clinton.

Could somebody tell me what a prostitute could possibly do that would be worth 5000? My husband can’t sleep until he finds out. Seriously, while people who love one another should stand by each other in almost every aspect of their lives, I honestly believe that adultery is a sign of such rampant disrespect and disregard for the very being of the spouse, that it doesn’t behoove the betrayed to believe a single word the betrayer has to say any more. Someone who genuinely loves you simply doesn’t betray you. Period. And don’t anyone dare spout anything resembling “It’s an illness; he can’t help it” because such beliefs are nothing but enabling nonsense. Adults CHOOSE, of their own free will, to do right or to do wrong. Obviously, this man chose to do wrong. From “Love Actually,” my favorite movie since it first came out, come these lines that sum it up, in my opinion: Karen: Would you stay, knowing life would always be a little bit worse? Or would you cut and run? Harry: Oh, God. I am so in the wrong. The classic fool. Karen: [voice breaking] Yes, but you’ve also made a fool out of me, and you’ve made the life I lead foolish too. That’s the thing, you see. Even if you do stay, your life - lives - will never be intact again. A man who can’t keep it in his pants, or a woman who can’t keep it OUT of her pants, can’t be trusted in any other aspect of life, either. That was probably OUR money he spent on himself, too. I deeply resent that. And while many people - most or whom lead lives similar to his - might easily forgive him (mostly for getting caught), I doubt that his wife and innocent children could. Perhaps what he needs to do now is decide who is most important to him: Mr. Happy or his family… .

My concern would be with the Spitzer’s children. What a message to send to teenage girls. No matter how enlightened their mother may be there is no getting around the fact that this could have a profound affect and effect on them and their adult years. The damage to them may not be known for many years. There are many other things in this world to be concerned about right now and whether or not Ms. Spitzer should stand by Mr. Spitzer is way at the bottom of my list.

Been there…. Some powerful Men seem to think that it is their right to use their spouses in some way even after their hands have been caught in one cookie jar or another. I think we woman ought to make a new rule that we don’t ever again stand next to our man after they have humiliated us and our family while he is publicly trying to explain it and/or advance in another way! The pain from her was almost overwhelming yesterday. I feel so much empathy for Silda. It is up to her about what she does about her marriage. We all have to walk that path out of the public eye.

No one can tell her what to do. It’s up to her and how she feels about him and the situation. It’s not easy no matter what she does. But it’s her life and she has to face whatever is the outcome. Hopefully it will pass quickly and she can go on with her life.

if you think of the money spent in this country pursuing victimless crime (specifically, prostitution and drugs), and how those BILLIONS of dollars cd be put to better use, it makes me ill. i leave aside, of course, the other impt issues of spitzer’s sanctimoniousness and hypocrisy—but since when is THAT news in a politician (or just abt any man who’s powerful, in my jaded opinion), esply when it comes to matters sexual. it wd appear that spitzer did nothing outright illegal (altho the tax issue is complicated) except visit hi-priced prostitutes (which lots of powerful men do, otherwise madame claude wdn’t have been in business so successfully for so long)—which shdn’t be illegal. it’s their money; it’s their decision; it’s their lives. jesus christ on a bike! where wd the news media be in this country without politicians’ many sexual peccadilloes to report on? when the fuck will this country grow up?!

I agree with Judith Martin, and I love Jane Wagner’s idea — the wife gets a break and the hooker gets to stand by her man.

Flip the parties — Would Mr. S. have appeared at the side of Mrs. S. had she publicly responded to being identified as the customer of a male prostitute? Would it have seemed as obligatory for both spouses?

I am sure the personal situation will be handled in a manner that will work best for this family. Personally, I don’t think it is any of my business. What is of more concern to me is how, why and by whom was this investigation initiated. It smacks of “big brother” to me and I find that frightening.