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Question of the Day | 10/28/2008 12:00 am

Whom do you envy?

Woman Jealous at Couple
© iStock
Mary Wells

Mary Wells | 10/28/2008 12:00 am

3 World Leaders Mary Wells Admires

The heads of China, India and Russia — I envy their possibilities now.
Liz Smith

Liz Smith | 10/28/2008 12:00 am

Why Liz Smith Thanks Her Shrink

Honeys, I have had it all. I haven’t envied anyone since back in the days of the invention of New Journalism when all of my peers were becoming famous and successful and my work in the same vein was being overlooked. But I got over it and with a little psychotherapy I got out of my own way and taking the advice of my shrink, Mildred Newman, I began to feel I could be as successful as anybody. Now and then I meet people with the certainty of faith I used to observe in my mother and I have a twinge of envy for their belief. But then reason prevails and I just forge ahead trying to learn more about everything on earth, so I can renew whatever it is I do believe in.

Click here on this text to read my New York Post column.

Joan Ganz Cooney

Joan Ganz Cooney | 10/28/2008 12:00 am

Joan Ganz Cooney on Envying 40ish Women

I envy lively women in their 40s like my very lively stepdaughter.

Joan Juliet Buck

Joan Juliet Buck | 10/28/2008 12:00 am

Why Joan Juliet Buck Admires Wise Young Ones

I envy people who knew who they were very young, so they didn’t spend their lives trying to please people who weren’t paying attention.

Cynthia McFadden

Cynthia McFadden | 10/29/2008 1:00 pm

Cynthia McFadden on Metabolism

I envy anyone who can eat whatever they want and not gain weight.

101 Reader Comments (so far…) Sign In or Register to comment

carol wilson
Let’s see …where do I start…I envy women with long slender legs. I envy people who grew up with inner confidence and got on their way with life without counseling and crippling insecurities. Most recently, I envy people who have loving happy adult children. As an artist, I envy the artists who have the confidence to promote and gain exposure of their work, rather than storing it under the bed.
By carol wilson on 10/28/2008 8:07 am
Serena .
Miss Carol, “I envy people who grew up with inner confidence and got on their way with life without counseling and crippling insecurities.” I hear you and I understand your pain—trust me. The answer? We have to learn how to mother ourselves. At least, that’s what I’m learning. As for your art, please don’t hide it away. Would you share it with us? Do you have a web site with any of your work posted?
By Serena . on 10/28/2008 5:53 pm
rosanna hillman
I envy my airedale. The life of a dog in my care is surely one of envy. Sadly though it is a better life than some human children have all across America and around the globe. rosanna
By rosanna hillman on 10/28/2008 8:35 am
Chrome Toe
who I envied over the years changes with the decades and my own development. When I was very young I envied people who “belonged”. my mom and i moved every six months or so until i was 18 and she moved without me! I craved belonging. So it was always the popular girls and the kids with a crowd taht i envied. Then in my twenties I envied people with the job i wanted. Another way I think to belong if I look at it. But I was certain that having the job i wanted would change my world. Then i got it. Then i envied people who had the NEXT job i wanted. Then i got over it. But it lasted into my early thirties. Most recently I’ve envied people who seem to really “know” what they’re good at and have been able to parlay that into some sort of living. Regardless of what that is money or status wise. I know longer look for something that I think other people would care about or think was important but something that I’m good that will carry me into the next decade. I’ve been rather lost on the career front for the last few years. Wondering if i’ll ever have one again. wondering what’s wrong with me that i can’t figure this out when in my twenties and thirties i was so sure of myself and what I wanted. I wanted the other persons job lol! And I’ve always envied really capable female athletes. the way they walk the way they hold themselves in their bodies. it’s a beautiful thing. wow… i’m an envious person! who knew???
By Chrome Toe on 10/28/2008 8:54 am
Chips AHoey
I envy disciplined, organized people who have enough money to pay their bills and who work out an hour a day and look awesome - but then I think that person is likely a boor who has some crazy ghosts in their closet!
By Chips AHoey on 10/28/2008 9:00 am
Chrome Toe
oh and I forgot who I often envy the very most… anyone old enough to have lived in southern california, or somewhere like Key West or Hawaii in the 40’s or 50’s… I really really really envy them!!! I just think it’s no fair at all that they got to see that and I didn’t! that they got to feel that air and that vibe and see the beauty before it was total concrete and tourists… so a big tongue at na na na to you if you fit that category!
By Chrome Toe on 10/28/2008 9:01 am
Dona Howlett
Kelly, I grew up in Southern California……..actually in the Valley, Bakersfield. It was hot in the summer……..played outside all day long……..barefooted, my mother couldn’t get us to wear shoes………. Layed out on a blanket on a Warm night looking up at the stars. There were Orchards and fields of vegetables and Wild flowers growing everywhere. When I look back it’s like taking a peek into another World. The Air was sweet and clean. I remember the smell of Alfalfa growing in the fields I love that fragrance. We climbed trees………played Hide and Seek………..Jacks………, hopscotch Swinging from a rope (with an old tire) attached to a tree………..what fun……….spin the bottle. No television, no CD’s………..no cell phones………..no I’Pods……….no DVD. We had our own Plays in the garage……..using an old white sheet for our curtain. charged a penny for our little home made tickets. Maybe you got to go see a movie matinee on a Saturday afternoon. Left home after breakfast to go play……….came home for lunch grabbed your peanut butter sandwich Mom made for us and off again until dinner ……………Mother’s didn’t have to worry about us being kidnapped or abused. All the Mother’s looked out for what ever kids were playing at their houses at the time. Yes it was a very different World………..I’m glad I was able to be a part of that kind of life. Now Kelly you can say na na na na na na………….it’s OK!…………………. lol!!!!!!! I’m sorry the children of Today will never know what that kind of FREEDOM was.
By Dona Howlett on 10/28/2008 4:40 pm
Chrome Toe
Oh Dona… your post actually brought tears to my eyes it sounds so beautiful. I don’t know why I have this odd longing in my heart for that time but I do. And I didn’t grow up now… I was ten years old in 1973… we didn’t have a tv then even. I got to live some of what you’re talking about but always in scrungy weird little towns. Usually cold as hell to. Winnemucca Nevada, Paxson Lodge Alaska, Bum fuck Kentucky… seriously. But even then by the time i had real memory it was pushing the 80’s you know. so the time you’re talking about had gone by. My older daughter has some of what i have… but more for the time I grew up in! There is a movie out called “Then and Now” (I think). it stars Demi Moore, Melanie Griffith and someone else i can’t remember. it’s about three women who grew up together in the 70’s. most of the movie is in their child hood. My daughter turned to me during that movie when she was about 15 and said “I wish I could have grown up then”. It’s still one of her favorite movies. So yes… you are at the very TOP of my envy list.
By Chrome Toe on 10/28/2008 6:03 pm
Dona Howlett
Kelly, I agree My childhood is something almost anyone could desire. Two extremly loving parents………both sets of grandparents Lots of Aunts and Uncles and cousins. Tons of friends, My adult life my dear you would not envy. I’ve had so many terrible tragedy’s in my life during the last 46 years. No one in their right mind would want to have to live through them. I’ve written about some of them here on Wow. When we get to a certain point in our lives Kelly we must come to the realization that there isn’t anything we can do about the past, except learn from the lessons. Everything from this time on……………… is our future. Make the best of each day………Be loving to your family, but remember most important of all is to be loving to your self. I was having a conversation with a friend about this subject today. I think the purpose of life is to be has happy as possible and have your days filled with JOY. When we are happy, we make others around us happy. I view all the things that have transpired in the last 50 years and wonder sometimes if they are for the good of mankind or the beginning of the end of tranquility for all of us. As in my above writing……..my childhood and most other children lives were carefree and very happy. Now children and young teenagers live’s are so filled with anxiety and so much fear. Just thinking about one word DEPRESSION………..that word didn’t exist as a decription on a persons emotional state when I was young……….We had sadness, but that’s a healthy state of emotion, Depression is a state of mental illness. We use that word to describe almost everyting that goes on in our daily lives………everyone is always saying they are depressed about something or other. We have more and more electronic mechanisms to communicate with each other, yet no one on one contact………instead of it bringing us together it seems to push us further apart. I hope I live long enough to see the radical changes all this is going to make in the World. I hope we have Writers who will write about the wonderful carefree life that the World had when we were more innocent………..I’m not trying to be a pollyana. I know that the World has always had terrible happenings……..Wars upon Wars, Natural disasters. etc. I’m just talking about the more simple times when we seem to have had time for each other. I for one MISS that. I have a question I ask myself every morning when I wakeup. Do you want to be happy today Dona? I then go about doing everything I can to be happy.
By Dona Howlett on 10/28/2008 11:38 pm
Chrome Toe
Tragedy - that is not a happy word. as of today… I have not had “tragedy” in my life. Loss and pain yes. but not tragedy. But I do not feel immune. I hear in your posts a great spirit of life and often joy. So whatever it is that has gone on in your life you have certainly had some success at your goal of finding the joy it appears. One of my very best friends is 69 this year. she had pain and loss in the death of her husband whom she’d been with since she was 16. he died of cancer. and she had tragedy in the unexpected death of her daughter just two months later. She is my hero because she has managed to feel the pain and the horror and still live a life of Joy. So you to are one of my heros. So i get to envy your childhood and admire your adult hood. so aren’t you somethin!
By Chrome Toe on 10/29/2008 8:39 am
Dona Howlett
Kelly, Thank you for your sweet words, They mean a lot to me.
By Dona Howlett on 10/30/2008 2:25 am
Jackie Sanders
Catherine Deneuve…no explanation needed.
By Jackie Sanders on 10/28/2008 9:15 am
Belinda Joy
I I envy Michelle Obama. Absent the kids, I would love her life (I don’t want children). She’s an accomplished lawyer married to a man that is dynamic by definition and poised to be our next president. I’ll admit it; I am one of those women that are easily seduced by a man of power. The ultimate power in my eyes is holding the highest office in our nation. I envy the fact that she clearly has this man that is devoted to her and loves her dearly.
By Belinda Joy on 10/28/2008 10:15 am
Serena .
I envy Jane Wagner for her wit, warmth, and genius and her ability to be half the reason her committed relationship has lasted for so many years.
By Serena . on 10/28/2008 10:33 am
Mommy Dearest
I don’t envy anyone, dahlings. But I do have a question, dears. Why, on a site for women over 40, are the women in the picture portraying envy in this question in their early 20’s? Are we supposed to be envious of THEM? Ahahahahaha!
By Mommy Dearest on 10/28/2008 10:47 am