No offense to LW#2, but—-although it may be harder when not able to congregate with a group of religiously-minded people—-I would think that, if your faith is strong, it shouldn’t matter whether there is 1 or 100 other people in Sweden that are Christian.  Faith is having belief in God even if there is nothing material or physical (i.e. like a large body of Christians) to prove that God is there.  Or at least, that is what I gather as I’m not Christian.

 Also…..as some others mentioned, I think it’s kind of callous/rude to say that people get "morals from what they believe is honorable behavior."  Just being religious does not imply someone is honorable.  If you want others to be tolerant and accepting of you, you shouldn’t go around criticizing others for doing what they think is right.  

I think we should all just have a group hug and have done with it  :P

Letter Two: Um, doesn’t *everybody*, religious or not, act with what they feel is honorable behavior? I’m sure even Charles Mansion and Ted Bundy had lines they wouldn’t cross. They just weren’t what most people (religious or not) think were the *right* ones. The only difference between religious people and atheists is who decides what’s honorable. I’m not an atheist, for the record. I’m agnostic. Both religion and atheism insist on too much black and white in a world that’s a billion shades of gray. I’m not anti-god at all, but I admit to being anti-organized religion. There’s a huge difference.

 Letter One: If you feel better cutting your dad out of your life, do it. I have a step-dad so toxic, I wouldn’t move half an inch to spit on if he was on fire, and my real dad was mostly absent, but once I got over expecting — or wanting — him to be a real father, we got along great when we did see each other. The only regret I had when he died four years ago was that I hadn’t been able to see him more. Of course, my dad went to my high school graduation even though he had to be in a wheelchair on oxygen to do it and I would’ve understood completely had he skipped it.

Regarding my post and the responses thereto.  I got the distinct (but maybe incorrect impression) that Margo was favorably comparing the Danish people who are religious to the ultra conservative Americans who are religious.  If Margo  and her supporting posters respect the beliefs of those in America who believe, as a matter of faith, that abortion is taking a human life, then I stand corrected.    Somehow, I doubt this to be true.  I’m pretty sure those who oppose abortiion are lumped  by Margo and her supporters in the category of ultra conservative wing nuts who don’t have the *enlightened* religion that those  people in Denmark practice.   Otherwise, what is the point of raising the issue?   Why not just say *I think if you keep attending churches you will find people who believe as you do*.  NOOOO… We have to point out that there are bad Americans who oppose abortion and are ultra conservative.  Unlike the enlightened Danish people. 

I think Margo was indeed saying that not all religious people are like the abortion foes in the United States.   In other words, you can still be *cool* and be religious.    Unless you oppose abortion.  Then you are marginalized as an ultra conservative wing nut.

I’m  personally ambivalent about abortion.  But clearly, there are those who divide the *good* religious people (who don’t oppose abortion) from the *bad* religious people who do.    And I don’t think you can claim to respect people’s religion when you do that exercise.  And of course, there is the added component of those *bad* religious people who vote Republican.   I think Margo, in her way, was trying to tell the letter writer that *even though you belieive in God you can still be cool as long as you are not ultra conservative and oppose abortion*.  I say this because she raised the point.   If I hit a nerve indicating intolerance…so sorry.   

#1…When you buy a bushel of apples, there are bound to be some rotten ones.  People automatically want to throw each rotten apple out and reach for the next one.  But because it’s a blood linked dad we’re talking about, it’s hard to toss him out.  He will be your dad forever whether you like it or not like it.

Most times it’s better to make applesauce with the good side of the apple, rather than toss it out completely.

And I don’t think you can claim to respect people’s religion when you do that exercise. 

Respecting and thinking someone is right are two different things, though. One can respect someone’s rights/beliefs all day long as an abstract noun, yet think the person is a kook. 

I respect the idea of scientology, but I don’t want anything to do with it. I respect the idea of the Church, but I don’t like what many people do as members. I will wear my voice out defending someone’s right to their viewpoints, but I will cross to the other side of the street when I see certain ones coming toward me. 

This is my first post, so here goes!! :-)  First of all, re LW#2, the name "Bjorn" is a male name, although a number of responding posters have referred to Bjorn as "she."  Sorry if that’s old news; I read many pages of posting, but then had to take a break, so might have missed someone else’s posting about this.  The reason I had to take a break, though, had to do with some surprisingly narrow-minded and bigoted input I read, posted by reader Messy One, to wit: "Not everyone "needs" a "higher power". The only people that do are those that lack the intelligence and wit to live by a code of ethics that comes from within …" (emphasis mine).  Shame on you, Messy One!  That remark alone seems to make your own intelligence and wit, and certainly any support for freedom of thought that you might claim, debatable. 

My dad was never the stellar father, far from it.  Tomcatting, drinking and drugs were always more important than being a good husband and father.  After my parents divorced, I hardly ever saw him and we became quite distant.  Although he was not the ideal, I still loved him dearly and I had to forgive him for injuring me emotionally so that I could heal.  After 20 years of near estrangement, he began getting back in touch with me.  And, in so many words, he apologized for not being around as much as he should.  Sometimes, distance is exactly what a relationship needs.  He has finally gotten it out of his system…mostly.  And I got over it…mostly.  LOL!  At least I am now able to crack a smile and say, eh, what are you going to do?