i went thru grade school being bullied by everybody and their mother. i wasn’t allowed to fight (which secretly worked for me b/c i was scared of hitting anybody and getting beat up) because of my mothers religion. i did manage never to actually be beat up even once b/c i had a next door neighbor who was a year older (she was sent back one year) and tough as nails. anybody that offered to fight me, had to fight her b/c she knew i wasn’t allowed. she stood up for me til junior high. by then they realized it was much more fun to taunt me than actually beat me.

then my first husband was a bully too. after i divorced him i gained a backbone and managed to become not just a bully to the bully’s but a defender of those that needed help. i never do any violence but will step in to help somebody if needed. i have taught my children (now grown) that fighting isn’t the answer and neither is bullying. my son tried to bully another boy in his special ed classes in elementary school. i got right on him and told him how would he like it if it was him. then he became a champion of the underdogs in the playground. they even called him bruiser b/c he would defend the other kids with his fist (i, of course had to stop him from doing that too). i was proud of his stand, but not the physical aspect of it. 

soon i will be working on my grandson. my daughter got bullied a lot too. the first thing i would do is go to the principal and ask it to stop. if it didn’t then i met with the kids parents with the school principal. it ALWAYS stopped after that. from day one i had zero tolerance for bullys with my kids. it will continue with my grandson!

I was one of 6 women to complete my undergrad work in a field not usually populated with women back in the late 60’s. It was darned hard getting in the door and then working my way up. I learned a very valuable lesson about life from my mother: never for one moment think of youself as inferior to men because you can do anything. This probably sent the message loud and clear that I wasn’t one to be bullied. And I never was.

I once worked at a very large company and with a man who was huge and intimidating. I had heard that he had intimidated a woman in a different department and she was so upset that she had turned in her resignation. Another female co-worker and I managed to talk to her and encourage her to seek legal counsel. Nasty court case but in the end she won and he was terminated and lost his pension. It took a lot of courage for her to follow through, but she had a lot of support from female co-workers.

Incidentally, for those with kids who might be bullied [or if YOU are] take a martial arts class. Not to use it on the person who bullies you, but to get a sense of empowerment.  Nothing like it.

You know what? I HAVE been bullied! I almost forgot about it. I was almost 5 years old and one day the school bus let me off in front of the house, which was about 100 feet from the front door. And what did I see in the middle of the front yard but a BULL!!!! I froze to death while it looked me over from over 50 feet away. I could swear it was snorting and ready to charge. I couldn’t even scream for my mother. But then my mom came out of the house [walking, not running] to collect me. Turns out our neighbor bought a cow and it had made its way into our yard. Scared the heck out of me just by looking at me with those sweet eyes.