get a new keyboard!

This is what Obama meant when he said “we all have someone that makes us cringe”. When I was 19 I had an uncle that came to visit from SC. He behaved the same way. I finally told him if he was going to stay with me he would have to refrain. He left and didn’t speak to me again for the rest of his life. Sometimes you just have to stand up for what is right. You didn’t loose them, they lost you. Shame on them.

I’m not a lawyer, but I know enough of them to know that you have to: Document, Document, Document! Carry a camera and a notebook. Take another adult with her..take pictures with a time/date stamp of the children standing at his front door. Write down when he says he’ll be there and then hold it in front of her as she stands in her empty doorway on the days he doesn’t show up. Call the mediator every time she goes to drop them off when he doesn’t answer the door, and every time he doesn’t show. She has to take it from the realm of “he said, she said”. If she can, audio tape everything he says to her. She should always have contemporaneous notes with time and date and who she was talking to. And she should try to have a witness whenever there is a contact. If she isn’t mindful he will use the same tactics to take the children. She needs a good support group/system. Women who have been through it and know how to come out the other side. The 9 year old can certainly note whether he ever showed up or not. It has to be when it happens though…OH! and yes, tell her to keep looking for a lawyer. Call the Lawyers guild. Make noise, make her problem his problem. One other thought…check NOLO press. They have a lot of legal publications on a lot of subjects for lay people. Maybe she can do some of her own legal work. But she sure shouldn’t take it sitting down!

Florida is especially touchy about such things after Ryila Wilson…and the other scandals that have endemic to that state. Check the Public Defenders office or County Counsel. Even if they can’t help you directly they have a list of attorneys that can. Also there are foster family websites that are helpful. CASA is some place to look (Court Appointed Special Advocates). They train foster care advocates and also have contacts. There is also the National Center for Youth Law (NYCL). Watch what they have done in the courts. These are places to start. for your state you will have to do some digging. There are child welfare advocacy organizations and law firms. You just have to dig around. Unfortunately the story you tell happens in every town, every county, and every state…every single day. It is hard to understand what they are doing. So much of it makes no sense and is arbitrary or budget driven. Not exactly good for the children. Given the national results for foster youth, they don’t necessarily protect children or improve their lives. Just a plug here: EVERY FOSTER KID NEEDS A CASA!!!! So volunteer Finally for all parents. No matter how short a time or how close you may be, don’t ever leave your kids alone in the car. This is only one of the tragedies that can befall them.

Ann, try CalWorks. It is a state program that helps develop and find jobs for every education level and experience level. It is tough to get noticed on the web. It isn’t the best place to look. for every job posting there are several hundred thousand resumes submitted. Also make sure that you find a good educational advocate who can ensure that your child gets the free and appropriate public education (FAPE ) that she is entitled to by federal and state law. She can have a great life. All over universities in California you see paraplegics and quadriplegics getting their degrees, working and having hopeful and good lives. Don’t despair, there is help. Just start looking for all the resources for what you need.

Can we talk about child welfare and the abysmal state of children taken into foster care? Today’s foster care system is a direct conduit to prison for far too many children. This country needs to talk about child welfare in this country.

I won’t turn off or unplug all my electronics at night…it would take hours to reset all the clocks..I also use paper plates and towels. Our town has a very aggressive recycle program. They even want food scraps. As a result, we recycle about three times what we throw away. There is just too much that is not recyclable. We often use freecycle.org to move or find things rather than throw them out. Reusing plastic water bottles is an unhealthy choice. When they sit in the sun or when they are reused over time they start to break down and nasty cancer causing chemicals leach into the contents. Not to mention the nasty chemicals they use to make them in the first place…

He wrote a book…

I think we better be nice to them…they own us now. Thank’s W.

I recently had to go to the police to rescue a broken hearted (her only parent died) 14 year old girl who had run away. She was gone a little over a week when a friend of her family’s found her for sale on Craigslist. She was being pimped by someone with whom MK clearly shares some empathy. Pictures and all. I was told that there are hundreds of children on that site being sold to and “rented” by men who have MK’s attitude toward women. Fortunately she was rescued. Maybe we need to be reminded to teach our daughters to respect their radar and stay away from just this kind of guy, and our sons to grow up to be anything but like him from time to time.. It is easy to forget there are some still like that in the world when you live in a world with decent men who have integrity and self respect. Men who are secure enough and smart enough to know that a good partner is worth more than “bragging rights” and who would be appalled by such nincompoopery… Was it Maya who said “when someone tells you who they really are, believe them the first time”? I believe you MK. ICK. Your one night stands should raise their rates.

Nimcompoory is such a fine word. And it sooo fits. There is no enlightening this so called Doctor. Just be grateful he isn’t treating anyone you know or care about and look forward to the time when he will be represented in an anthropological study subject in High School under ancient discredited mythology.

Oh, quickly, get out the tape measure!!! Not worth sticking around for… hmm? Do you think that an insect knows it is an insect?

Oh, quickly, get out the tape measure!!! Not worth sticking around for… hmm? Do you think that an insect knows it is an insect? Apparently not in this case.

Oh, quickly, get out the tape measure!!! Not worth sticking around for… hmm? Do you think that an insect knows it is an insect? Apparently not in this case.

Men like Dr. Klien are why women are contemptuous. Rather than be trod upon we finally had to step up. As with the Taliban, western men thought that they had the only answers. Women are changing the world for the better at every level of society. Troglodytes are going the way of all dinosaurs. Poor, poor pitiful you. I am amazed at how often fiction is pulled out to support ridicules arguments. Think: the republican debate where each candidate pointed to JACK BOWER as the way to deal with real problems in the real world. In the REAL world Feminism has saved families from ruin, saved companies from ruin, saved the economy from ruin and as it evolves feminism will save humanity from ruin. Honestly. We have to teach our children better. Respect the respectable!