Laurie Deer

My Comments (152 so far…)

What kind of negotiator are you?

Not a very good one. My mom, legend has it, was one sharp negotiator who could walk out of a room with more than she intended on getting (school board funding). I on the other hand did it my way with not much success. Now, I’ll try it her way, go in very high and come out medium to high.

Trader Vic's, Horn & Hardart, Schrafft's … What now-extinct food establishment still tugs at your memory?

Rabaska’s at the corner of Old Malone Hwy and the 207. Every now and then I crave their pizza, nobody can duplicate it or even come close. They closed after a fire and never reopened about eight years ago. It was the cornerstone of my hometown. My uncle ate breakfast everyday ordering porridge, toast and coffee and overhearing the daily news and gossip much to his enjoyment and to all the other patrons. It was once said people who dined in where only there for gossip. I rarely dined in usually ordered take out or delivery, avoiding the round-table discussions, lol, or the curious glances. Or worse, being drawn into conversation with some of the most inquisitive people in my hometown. Some things are best left unsaid, lol. Even now I would brave the traffic to order a pizza if they were open.

How generous are you with your own possessions when it comes to your family?

OOPs, hit the wrong button. Here I go again, my apologies. When it came to my personal possessions, including time, there were no boundaries. One of the worst, my new car came back without an antenna. My generosity with family at one point was too much, my husband can attest. I would lend my car, my house, my clothes but most of all my time.

Today, I am generous in other ways that do not involve my worldly possessions, including my time. I actively coordinate clothing and food drives for a local shelter with my time and resources. As for family, well lets just say after years of being the national clearing house door mat I am now more possessive of my things, that goes for time.

How generous are you with your own possessions when it comes to your family?

When it came to my personal possessions, including time, there were no boundaries. My new car came back without an antenana

What are the top three subjects you talk about with your best girlfriends?

We talk about the joys of motherhood, our careers and our husbands, of course! Recently, we discussed what we really wanted in a career and how it’s changing from being workaholics to doing something fulfilling and less time consuming. Thus giving us more time with our family. We compare mothering strategies for tweens and habits of our husbands and occasionally reminisce about our college days. With our hectic schedule, get-togethers are cherished.

Do you multitask while driving?

My commute is long each day so I used to make appointments, call the hubby about dinner and at times soothe a disgruntled or tired child. I hurt my arm from constantly twisting reach my son in the back seat.

Now, I just listen to the radio or an audio book and enjoy the 45 minutes of my time with miminal multi-tasking.

Frenemies, by Sheila Nevins

That’s great beginning of a summer read. That’s a classic "Frenemie" and I am glad not to have her in my life. As for being a frenemie to someone, impossible because I am too honest of a person and would blurt it out. It does make you wonder about your circle of friends and who are the true ones.

On the ten-year anniversay of the death of John F. Kennedy, his wife, and his sister-in-law, how do you remember JFK Jr.?

Sadly, I remember the day he died along with his wife and sister-in-law. JFK Jr. represented a new kind of change along with his charm and good looks both of which won him an election way before his time. Destined to be a president without any doubt and left much too early.

How many times have you read To Kill a Mockingbird?

It was on my mom’s bookshelf and around fourteen I tried twice not making quite past the first chapter.

Is your best friend a man or a woman?

We came from opposite worlds: a rez kid and a worldly girl. Our differences are as huge as our similarities. All these years later: we celebrate Orthodox Easter through our husbands, live ten minutes apart (not planned), our children are similar in ages and we married within a year of each other. Our differences are what brought us together; she came from stable family, while my parents were divorced. She lived all over the world by time she was 18, I lived in one place all my life. She was a straight shooter while I continually tested the limits in much of everything. She has only a brother, I have five sisters.

There were years we didn’t see each other and years we were in constant touch. Today, we both plan events at our respective jobs, although on much different scales. We both have a mother-in-law and no father-in-law. While I am quick on the trigger, she is more forbearing. I complain, she listens. She hates talking on the phone, I just started hating talking on the phone. We share our everyday mothering experiences, talk about our husbands, laugh and sometimes cry.

She is simply a great friend.

Ruth Madoff 'Embarrassed and Ashamed,' 'Betrayed' by Husband's Scam

Ruth Madoff knew about her husband’s wrongdoing. She withdrew quite a large sum of money the day before he was arrested, coincidence I think not. To maintain some type of dignity, she is trying to come across as a victim too. A little to little and a little to late.

How do you cool off in the heat of summer?

By the pool with my children. I insisted the one thing in our new home was a pool and got it. If you get my machine I am by the pool. Enjoy.

You've hosted dinner parties, lunches, cocktail parties, everything. What's your No. 1 best tip for entertaining?

My nature is small dinner parties with close friends as the social butterfly in me is shy in large settings. I am actually hosting a party tomorrow with some 30 guests, it’s annual one. I used to overwhelm myself with every little detail. Now, my menu is simple but delicious and I do my shopping in spurts over the week, instead of all in one day.

When my shyness reveals itself, I retreat to the kitchen for a while but as many know the kitchen is the best place of the party. And for me it works great. Best advice, lots of ice and relax.

What thoughts do you have about Ruth Madoff as we near her husband's sentencing?

She is like other wives of notorious criminal men. From reading the Vanity Fair article, I am swayed to think she was aware and very involved in spending the money. We know things change in our husbands, some of us are acutely aware of what it is and some not so much.

How do I feel about it? It saddens me to think of all the people he stole from who are without possibly their homes, a retirement and for the elderly who are now displaced.

I wish her well and hope that she finds some type of redemption in the rest of her life.

What book that you know you should read – but haven't gotten around to yet – haunts you from your bedside table?

Oh, there are a few from years past. The most recent is "Change your thoughts change you life - 81 verses of the Tao" by Wayne Dyer. I got to verse 8 or 9 and just could not get the interest going. The concept is great but my interests wanes……..