Oh! My Favorite

My Comments (178 so far…)

How old were you when you first got married?

1st marriage at 18, 2nd marriage at 29, so I learned that it wasn’t suited for marriage to anyone. Most significant marriage? Bought MYSELF a gorgeous band at 35 and have been happily wedded to MYSELF ever since.

Dear Margo: Does Your Friend Have a White Stripe Down His Back?

1st Letter: The most egregious mistake that ALL women make is to assume that our romantic relationships are EXCLUSIVE. As early on as you may care…ASK: Am I the only woman you’re dating/seeing/having sex with? If you don’t jive with the answer, move along to a new romance. There are many reasons why a woman doesn’t ASK but being afraid to know the answer has never kept the answer from being there. When you assume…

Dear Margo: Looking for Greener Grass

Hahahahah, Malache! You’re right that it is "so old" that women freak out over this. Another "dumb woman" trip I’ve never understood is getting angry because your man is looking at other women in real life. I’m only worried about what other women my man might be TOUCHING, and even then I’d have to think about what I’m doing to lead him into the arms of another woman (Cads not included). Too many women shut off the sex valve and then are flabbergasted when they find out their husbands are having affairs. It’s 2009 and women need to drop the shame of sex from their minds and get on with it. Especially if the woman is a wife.

Liz Smith: Elizabeth Edwards 'Made Her Own Big Ethical Mistake'

There are 2 people to blame for John Edwards’ affair: Mr. John and Mrs. Elizabeth Edwards. It’s their marriage.

Dear Margo: Looking for Greener Grass

True enough, Susan. But I was going under the assumption that this couple has an otherwise "intimate" relationship wherein they can talk about their feelings and expectations with respect and a certain degree of willingness to comply. If a man has intimacy issues I believe an astute woman will have noticed something soon enough or will use self-delusion to survive. "And when he wants his lover/spouse to act as the porn stars." maybe a wife/S.O. ought to consider that as one aspect of maintaining the relationship? I don’t consider it "fair" that a woman in a relationship wants to ensure that she is respected by her man by NOT being free and experimental in their sex life. Your last line brings it all home for me, too, however ("A man can objectify the woman he’s with, but only if he keeps his mouth shut about it, and has the ability for a healthy level of intimacy."). You’re right about that. I think it’s safe to say that while we’ve expressed ourselves differently, we’re of the same opinion. Thanks.

Dear Margo: Looking for Greener Grass

I’ve never understood the women’s complaint about their men viewing pornography. Men view pornography! I don’t understand placing such a great weight of MY worth on whether a man can stay VISUALLY faithful to me. You’re having great sex? He’s probably getting ideas, confidence and stimulation from that porn you protest. Unless your man is exhibiting true signs of infidelity, leave it alone ladies. If your man EVER wants another woman he’ll go and get one and pornography will have very little to do with that. Now…about the complaints with the toilet seat being left up…

Have you ever felt trapped? What were the circumstances?

I felt trapped into marrying my daughter’s father. After 5 difficult dating years I became pregnant. Knowing the life I wanted to provide my child, I was convinced by outside forces that marrying would stabilize my life. Within 4 years of my daughter’s life she was a nervous wreck from witnessing my, and suffering her own, emotional abuse from "the solution". I grabbed up my child and fled. Weve battled his emotional abuse ever since but from the fortress of our own address, where he can be diminished and dismissed as the misogynistic, ineffectual wanna-be that he keeps proving he is.

Dear Margo: Leaving Well Enough Alone

Hello Jacquiline Henson. I was sad to read that you miscarried your son. While I don’t know from personal experience, as a mother I can imagine your pain. You deserve praise for protecting your son even before his birth by leaving the abuse his father was putting you through!! Congratulations for valuing yourself and your son so highly! I know that the loss of your son will stay with you for your life, but please try to forgive yourself? You did what you could, when you could, how you could and not even God asks for more from us. Tonight I will say a prayer for you and your son in heaven.

Dear Margo: Leaving Well Enough Alone

Hello Margo. It’s not just the lack of belief that, for me, shows a sheltered life. The unkind, even vicious, replies from posters has informed me that too many folks (fortunately) don’t have a clue about the truth of abuse in all its forms. I will be stealing your closing line, though, since it is snippy and snappy at the same time. I enjoy your column at least as much as I did your mother’s! Thank you for your contribution.

Dear Margo: Leaving Well Enough Alone

Dear Suzanne. My comment was directed to your complete lack of KINDNESS in your remarks, not the LOGIC of them, so try to stay focused, Darlin’. As you quoted me, you may remember that I said I know first hand how the abuse of your child can effect you as a mother. I removed my child from victimization because I didn’t view myself as a victim but that doesn’t seem to be THIS mother’s attitude. My comment was that we Wow Posters must be KIND in our advice to this writer. I read two of your UNKIND comments. And btw…who are you trying to kid? During the presidential campaign YOU were among the "right wingers", Suzanne! I remember ALL of your posts. You seem just a mean chick who’s had a hard life (maybe) and you have shown no respect or sympathy for anyone in any posting which I’ve seen you comment on. We must always be KIND, Suzanne Dear.

Dear Margo: Leaving Well Enough Alone

Nanchan U! OMG. Do I LOVE the way you give it to ‘em! Thanks for posting a "slap-on-the-wrist" to all the name callers. I was doing my bit, too, but I like your style better. Good going!

Dear Margo: Leaving Well Enough Alone

Hey Rainbow! Thanks for giving LW2 sound advice without harsh commentary. She needs THAT to help her save her son and herself. Great reply!

Dear Margo: Leaving Well Enough Alone

LOVED your reply, Nanchan U!! Loved it. You addressed LW2’s problem without making her feel worse about the situation, which many posters didn’t do. I agree that this mom sounds scared and beaten herself. I’m not saying we WoW posters shouldn’t say what we’ve been saying (I posted something similar) but our voices need to be kinder to this woman who is already suffering unkind treatment. I know firsthand how the abuse of your child can rain down on a mother like physical pain. Great reply. Thanks.