Yes, chrome toe, you are right, it’s about how we verbalize, and before we do that, how we THINK about the differentials between “work” and “life.” Except there isn’t a schism between the two unless we put it there. Yes, Joan, raising a family is hard work. Being a care-giver, as I have been, is hard work. But it seems to me that to characterize different sections of our life as hard work, or defining work as just something we do to pay the bills, is to undermine ourselves and our possibilities, and negate the rewards that come from our hard work in every area of our lives. Which reminds me of this quote by Rabindranath Tagore: I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I woke and found that life was service. I acted, and behold, service was joy. I learned from my dying young sister, who “worked” every day of her short life just to stay alive, and then went far beyond that, that joy is available no matter what your circumstance. We can’t control life by being afraid of it. Our only power is in how we choose to respond to our situation. Understand the difference between giving up and surrender. Never give up. All of that is about finding balance in our lives, every part of our lives. Work is not separate from life, it’s part of it. And if we recognize this, we don’t have to lose our identity when we lose our jobs. I define myself by WHO I am, not WHAT I am in the workplace.

My life embraces my husband, my family and friends, my work as a writer, speaker and workshop leader. I can’t separate them out and say “this is work” and “this is life” because I love the work I do so much, my life would be spiritually impoverished without it. At the same time, I agree with you, Linda, that how we language our selves and our lives has a great deal to do with how both we and society view ourselves. I have a friend who calls her life (a 9-5 job and 3 year old twin boys) a “nightmare.” I keep reminding her that if she sees her life as a nightmare, and calls it that, that’s what it will be. Through thought and language, we create our own reality. It’s up to us to create a different one, and that’s not just semantics. As Ghandi said, we must be the change we want to see in the world.

Your birthday is indeed cause for celebration - wishing you great blessings and warm hugs, Len and Heather Cariou

My reason for watching the Super Bowl? My husband!

Alex - by the way, over a size 8 isn’t FAT either! You can be a trim, healthy and attractive size 10, 12 or even 14. Many women who exercise and eat right can gain weight as they age depending on genes and hormones. Thank god I’m well over fifty, and no longer need or desire to look as I did when I was 25. So I’m one of those size 14 good lookers, devoted as much to developing my mind and spirit as I am to my appearance.

PS - I’ve been spanked enough for my transgression. Please note the apology I posted yesterday, to be found near the end of the this comment list. Now let’s move on.

Let’s be clear. I wasn’t advertising my book. I was sharing how I came to arrive at the career I now have, and what came out of it. I was naming my accomplishment, something every woman should be encouraged to do. If I was advertising, I’d have put review quotes and a blurb.

Okey dokey ladies. I’ve been posting on WOW here and there for a couple of months, wasn’t aware of the Ten Commandments, and all my posts have been relative to the questions asked. I didn’t consider posting my website address advertising persay. I post it by habit with all online correspodance. As to the matter of the most recent post in answer to the question about career, I’m very proud of the work I’ve done as an author, proud of beginning a new career after 50. I would have thought that this website might be more supportive of the work of women over 50, and supportive of their at least referring to it when the subject matter calls for it. I henceforth promise to never post the name of my book again, or sign with my web address. However, I would like to suggest to WOW that they provide a forum for women to share their acheivements, whether books or businesses. Or perhaps a weekly book review! My apologies to anyone I’ve offended. I’m a straight shooter who always plays by the rules.

I don’t understand. I have only one computer, one identity, and made one posting this mornng that didn’t violate anything. I’m very upset and confused about this.

This comment has been deleted as it violated our Ten Commandments of Posting on our website. A: The Ten Commandments of Commenting on wowOwow: Thou shalt not call one another derogatory names Thou shalt not make personal attacks on other readers or contributors Thou shalt not write anything libelous Thou shalt not ever make threats against another reader or contributor Thou shalt not use racist language Thou shalt not use violent language Thou shalt not swear excessively Thou shalt not have more than two identities registered from the same computer Thou shalt not solicit for goods or services Thou shalt not post or forward spam

We all need to dig deep and find the Helen Suzman inside each of us, and throw a little light into our own dark corners.

Why are we discussing beauty pains when there are more serious issues in our lives to be discussed?

I hope my legacy will influence the younger people in my life to live intrepidly and with kindness and compassion. I know that one of my legacies will be the book I’ve written, “Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister’s Memoir,” about growing up as a well-sibling, and a witness to my sister’s battle with Cystic Fibrosis. I wrote it for any women on her own heroine’s journey, and it’s inspiration for becoming a warrior on behalf of your own life. The beautiful thing is it’s a legacy I can share while I’m still on the planet! www.sixtyfiverosesthebook.com

My biggest disillusionment was the end of my first marriage.

If you are a woman on your own heroine’s journey, or looking for inspiration in the act of becoming a warrior on behalf of your own life, this book is for you. “Sixtyfive Roses: A Sister’s Memoir” is a story of family love, loss and survival. Celine Dion wrote the foreword, Angela Lansbury said she couldn’t put it down, and Eva Longoria optioned the film rights! 5% of proceeds benefit the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. For more go to www.sixtyfiverosesthebook.com