Why, dahlings, as a judge on "Dancing With the Stars." 

I would be the only real star, of course, but would be happy to replace that little Italian man, who could be sent off to learn to speak English without using animal-based dance similes.

Dahlings!  I’ve measured the exact amount I care about Donald Trump’s decision to make Joan Rivers his "Celebrity Apprentice," and have found the most extraordinary coincidence. 

It is precisely the same amount that he cares about my reaction!

"One of the most telling details to surface during the tawdry Hunter saga is that Edwards felt that it was somehow mitigating to note that his wife had been in remission when he began his affair."

Dahling, this was one of the creepiest statements to emit from that politician with the expensive/bad haircut, in this Mommy’s opinion.  Allow me to translate… "She didn’t have cancer (yet), so it wasn’t like it was a BIG betrayal, you guys."

Mommy shudders.

Dahlings, am I the only one who’s sick to DEATH of Ms. Walters? 

Over exposure, my dear Barbara, is inadvisable to both sun AND media. 

I, for one, cringe every time her little cheerleading section on "The View" refer to her as an "icon," and mention her book over and over and over again.  Mommy thinks that show is more an infomercial for Walters’ projects than a discussion among women of varying opinions, dahlings.

I will say this, dahlings, and not speak on the subject again. 

If John Edwards is the prize, I’m most definitely NOT in the competition, my dears.

You make a good point, Patty, dahling.  In this country, thankfully, we have more than the "court of public opinion;" although, I’m not certain from whence an impartial jury would be found, once the scorned wife has appeared on "Oprah" discussing her book on the subject, do you, dear?

Ahahahahahahaha!  Lady Gator’s wit is as sharp as those gator teeth, dahlings.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Dahlings, did you have high hopes for the intellectual capacities of a man known as "Joe, the Plumber"? 

Mommy, the Dearest finds that hilarious!

Candy, dahling, you’re sweet, smart and sassy.  May you enjoy many birthdays to come, my dear.

We’re ALL terminal, dahlings.  No one gets out of this alive.  Elizabeth’s situation is different from ours only in that she has a vague idea when she’ll die - and we don’t.  For all we know we could die before she does, so I don’t see what that has to do with this issue.

I don’t know Elizabeth or John.  Even if I did, dears, I wouldn’t think of giving Elizabeth advice.  Personally, I think writing this book looks a bit passive/aggressive, dahlings, and I won’t be reading it.