I think the truest thing I’ve read on suicide was an ad in the Carmel Pine Cone newspaper for a fundraiser walk for a suicide prevention group. It read “People do not want to end their life they want to end their pain.” Some are too private and proud to ask for help, and some have an overwhelming sense of responsibility for others and do it as a measure of sacrificing their lives for their insurance money for others. Speaking of the Carmel Pine Cone…..here’s from the editor this week: “Dear Reader, A Big Sur Labrador is safe at home after barely escaping death in the jaws of a mountain lion. The dog was saved by her pal, another black Lab mix. Chris Counts has the chilling story. To download this week’s Pine Cone, please click on this link. http://www.pineconearchive.com/downloads090109.htm Great photo of the two dogs. Love Labs.

Dona, I always loved board games, too. And funny games like ‘Pictionary”. My sister-in-law and I are both artists so everyone wants us on their teams…We had an exchange student one Thanksgiving and after dinner broke into two teams of 8 each for Pictionary….she sat it out because didn’t speak English very well and was laughing hysterically over how intense it got. Also love Trivia Pursuit and dumb kids games like ‘Clue’ and chess…and poker, too. “No amount of money..having or not having is worth someone’s life.” I agree. Unfortunately many men define themselves in direct correlation to how much they accumulate so when it’s gone they feel like less than zero, when they’ve always been successful it’s even harder to accept. My brother’s fault was being too generous despite what we all told him, ie, placing multi-millions in irrevocable insurance trusts for his wife and kids so that his money was beyond his grasp. Dad has also seen all his investments lose more than 1/2 value total, and on top of all his illness has been diagnosed with cancer. But he remains positive and cheerful…always upbeat. My mom said is partly a front for the ‘kids’ although he is a very positive guy. Rats, Dona….! But my guess is you’ll be fine. Still, it’s never fun to lose hard earned money. Hopefully the investments will bounce back. That Madoff even scammed his own sister. She has nothing left and has to sell her home….which has fallen in value. Trouble all around.

Marta, Actually suicide is the third highest cause of death in the US today among adults, and is on the rise among middle-aged adults and esp women. I also thought it was a huge mistake, and rather a novice one, of Ms. Penney to trust all her investments to one source but she had been reassured by many that Madoff was safe. I feel very fortunate to have worked with the ‘Tiffany’ of investment firms, to have gotten a stock broker’s license and observe Wall St. from the inside. Made me a huge skeptic, aware of the games, and a good researcher. “I mean the world crisis we should understand that this is only the beginning, it is going to be much worse in the following years, so ladies, do keep healthy in mind & body, keep an eagle eye on your money & pray…” I told my mother in 2001-2 when Phil Gramm & the GOP totally deregulated derivatives that this would all happen so put your money in safe and diverse places. There is no possible way to deregulate derivatives and have a stable economy—those are mutually exclusive things. Phil Gramm and an army of others should spend the rest of their lives in jail..as a deterrent. But that isn’t goling to happen.

That’s ‘situations’ not ‘solutions.’

Alexandra Penney, a bestselling author, artist, former editor of Self Magazine….worked and saved from a young age and then invested all of those hard earned savings with Madoff. It is all gone. She is in total shock. From the outside it is easy to say…she has talent, ability, she can make it again….but no one knows how enormous and overwhelming this feels to her…and that together with the shock of it, the undouted self-anger for investing everything in one place….can feel like an insurmountable weigth when you need all your energy and then some to recoup. Hopefully among her friends and family and contacts good news will come and lessen the blow. This is happening by the millions…a certain percentage just will not be able to cope, nor have the gas to go on. It is sad, predictable and easy to comprehend. I do believe she will be one who turns it around….but it certainly is very hard to do so at her age and when she thought she did everything right to ensure a comfortable ‘golden’ age.

Often, presciption depression drugs carry warnings that they increase the risk of suicide.

Attempting to attribute something so complex and individual to “It happens because…[fill in the blank] ” is disrespectful, wrong-headed and dismissive. In the case of men who’ve always been successful and who self-define by being providers, sometimes they do it for the pragmatic reason that the suicide clause on their multi-million dollar insurance policies has expired and they see it as a way to take care of others. Not because they didn’t love life, but as a selfless act born out of an overwhelming sense of responsibility. After French investment manager, Rene-Thierry Magon de la Villehuchet, lost $1.4 billion of his family’s and friend’s money in the Madoff fraud he killed himself in his Manhattan office. By all accounts he was down-to-Earth, a great sailor, friendly to all, and in love with life. His brother said he it was a ‘noble’ suicide. Even when a note is left behind no one knows the full reasons of another person’s heart or mind, no matter how close. We never know what long-held dreams or beliefs were shattered, or the meaning or weight of events to another. De la Villehuchet was the furthest thing from ‘crazy’ and what an indignity to characterize what he or anyone else does in that horrible moment, other than what it is…an irretrivable tragedy for everyone involved, and one that will never go away. For example, Socrates had his full wits about him when he drank the Hemlock in 399 B.C., he was a martyr of conscience. Even centuries later one can feel that sad ending to a contributing and majestic life. Didn’t men landing at Normandy know they were committing suicide? etc etc etc. A list of high-profile suicides…..these did not have any commonality except possibly momentary despair that they couldn’t see past. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicides

“Suicide is usually a form of craziness.” Here is a short and incomplete list of famous suicides. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicides I think if there is any common theme, which there isn’t, it would be despair, not ‘craziness.’ It is a very sad and permanent end to temporary but overwhelming solutions, and springs from a wide and individual range of drives. From someone I admire and think is so intelligent….this was a really disappointing and unfortunate choice of words.