LW#1 - do not lie… and to those that think that the dollar amount itself is the problem - that was never mentioned anywhere in the letter.  The problem is the fact that the fiancee had the nerve to ask for the money at all. 

Why wouldn’t you just let her know that you think this is an inapppropriate request?  Have you talked to the other 19 folks on the "pay up" list to see what their feelings are? I think if you all band together and confront this head on, she could see the error of her ways and you might still be able to celebrate your friend’s birthday.

Boo!  Betcha don’t have the hiccups anymore, now do ya?

The Bible also teaches that fellowship with like-minded people is necessary for spiritual growth and that wherever 2 or more are gathered in His name, there He will be. There is nothing weak about someone who is trying to seek out other Christians to fellowship with. Some people are born to be leaders and others to be followers, the latter need to be led and to have a consistent presence in their lives. It is of little comfort to be surrounded by people who do not live and believe as you do and it can become discouraging.

for LW#1 - in all of this why is there no advice that she just be honest with both her husband and Sean and see where that takes her? One or both men may decide that she is not the right woman for them, but perhaps it would provide her with some peace of mind - and lo and behold, a little maturity at a time when she desperately needs it. It will certainly be tough at first, but I bet she would come out a better person (one would hope) after having learned a very tough lesson. She needs to understand what it was that made her "unhappy" in her first marriage so that she is not doomed to pass along those same habits/traits/whatever to her children.

excellent response and advice!  I agree - and this principle is one to live by in other aspects of life… people will react to and communicate with you on the same level (in general) to which you communicate with them.

LW#2 - I guess I don’t see the need for all the concern, unless it’s in the statement "these purchases are quite irrational."  I, too, am married to someone who does a tremendous amount of research before making any type of purchasing decision - especially one that involves a lot of money. Frankly I find it comforting that he is willing to go to every dealership and do test drives to find out what he likes and doesn’t like since he knows we’ll be living with that decision for quite a while. Now fortunately, he doesn’t do the same thing with clothing purchases.  To me her hubby may just be a conscientious purchaser.  Heck, I know if I buy something expensive, whether it is shoes or jewelry, or whatever, I tend to wear it only on special occasions so as to not wear it out.

Re: LW#1 -  I do agree that this woman comes across as rather immature and crass and to that point calls herself a "gold digger". However, I do not see anything wrong with seeking out someone who can support you - within reason. My ex-husband drained me financially - we married very young, I was 21 - and when we divorced he walked away with nothing and I was left to pay off all of the debts. I simply did not trust him not to ruin my credit along with everything else.  When I met my current husband we both were looking for someone who was more compatible on the financial front. He wanted someone who could support herself, if needed, but he had no problem with providing the support.  I just wanted someone who made at least the same kind of income as me so I didn’t always feel like the major breadwinner.  My advice to LW#1 is that there are many men out there who, after being burned by a wife who is only after $$, start to look for a woman who is capable of being financially independent, if the need arises.  You should take some of the advice presented here: get an education, get a job, etc., then see what kind of world opens up to you on this front.  If you are disappointed in the end, at least you will have your own resources to fall back upon.

What’s more American than hotdogs on the BBQ on July 4th?  Wait, that didn’t come out right…

Margo, he probably hated the fact that he had an email in his box this morning about another comment from you! ;)

Mike - just set up a filter on your email account to forward anything that starts with "New comment by Margo Howard" to your trash bin. Simple solution.

thanks!

Look ma, no hands!

A lot of comments today about this height topic. Generally, I agree with the other posters who are amazed that lw#1 finds the tall comments to be rude or an insult. She doesn’t say anything about name calling (such as Amanda S.’s unfortunate nickname in high school), only that people comment about her looking older than she is or that clothing options must be difficult.  Both statements are likely true!  It sounds to me that if the daughter is "bothered" by comments she may very well be picking up on the discomfort of her mother.

So, Mom, lighten up a bit!  Being tall is nothing to be ashamed of. Neither is being short. I also agree that there are many other role models out there than "fashion models". Other than gymnasts, many female athletes can be looked to for height inspiration - and these do not have to be professional athletes. Try taking your daughter to a local high school (or even community college) basketball game… talk to some other girls who have gone through some of the same things she’s going through now. I’m sure many of these young women would be more than happy to tell her how rich and fulfilling her life will be.

3 dogs - 2 Pomeranians and 1 Greyhound (recently rescued).

I highly recommend adopting a greyhound - they make wonderful housepets, but not your typical "companion" dog as they can be quite lazy! (almost cat-like in this regard). The pommies make wonderful watch dogs as they will bark at just about anything that moves outside the front door, but otherwise very well behaved little dogs (I think they often get an unfair ‘rep - sort of like a chihuahua). 

Is WoW not up on the news that these suits are now banned for international competion? Take a look at recent rulings by FINA. This meet is the last that these will be seen and there is already talk of putting an asterisk next to every single one of these records.

Do you honestly think that runners wouldn’t want to run in the most technologically advanced running shoe they could get their hands on? Of course swimmers jumped at the chance to wear a new suit where a fraction of a second makes the difference between olympic gold and silver. 

You mean, you can still see me? What gave it away?

Interestingly enough, the post about the spam was deleted. Unfortunate that some things are censored, but others are not.  Margo, I have seen KIT post advice in your twice-weekly columns. That, too, surprises me.

Regarding this article, I read with interest your thoughts on this. I think people are taking the term "medieval" out of context. I don’t think you were suggesting that the US would be thrust back into the stone age - we simply have too much technology available to us.  The only way that could conceivably happen would be for us to be completely annihlated. I pray that never happens, despite what fundamentalists might preach.