To be of faith means one believes/has faith in that particular religion. It sounds as if she is not currently practicing Judaism since she places the religious descriptor on her mother. She may be of Jewish heritage, but not faith.

 I find it intersting that a woman can convert to Judaism & then one’s children are "Jewish". THis is likely off base, but if the Jews are limiting their clan to those who have descended from the "chosen ones" then those who marry into & change faith of their own volitions aren’t truly the "chosen ones" since they aren’t true descendants of those from centuries ago. .  Am I misunderstanding something here? 

LW1: I agree. An immature, rebellious, misguided teenager who just lost her mother could be a lot different person than a 27 yr old. Perhaps she has finally grown up & should be given a chance.  I’d be curious how her mother died. If she was ill for a long time then this girl likely wasn’t mothered well. Or if she was into drugs, suicidal, etc. that wouldn’t bode well either. 

LW2: same as you. We had no children in our wedding. But I had no close friends or family with kids.  I find it rather silly-even if they are cute. My own kids have been in weddings & both times practically stole the show.  

I understand. I love that one can edit on Facebook (after posted) . Wish it were the same here. 

Just trying to educate as most people don’t understand the terminal part. There was a big movement to get everyone to have one many years ago, but the terminal part wasn’t emphasized. It makes the living will not a very useful document. A Power of attorney (medical) is so much better-it is valid whenever the patient isn’t able to make decisions.  

  The other side of the coin: Perhaps this is common in her circle. AMybe she was going to have a little shin dig & some of the friends said "Let’s do it up right & all chip in." She mentions she appreciates "others wanting to help host" . It sounds as if she has discussed it with others since she mentions knocking the cost down (BYOB). I’m curious if this particular friend, who wrote to DM, is out of the loop & many of the others agreed to co-host.  $300 is steep, but again the writer, a casual acquaintance,  seems to be out of the loop on what the plans are…

Furthermore, $300 wouldn’t be that steep to some. Just depends…  

Good points & that is how I read it as well.

To clarify, Living wills are only valid if one is deemed to be terminally ill. So if you are unable to make decisions for yourself (stroke, head injury, dementia/Alzheimers, or some other numerous illness that requires one to be on a ventilator & heavily sedated), the living will is invalid as one is not "terminal". A medical power of attorney is crucial. It is also wise to elect someone & a backup. That person should be one who agrees to comply with your wishes & even more so is in agreement. Physicians will not go against loved one’s wishes if it doesn’t jive with your own. You can’t sue, but they can… 

I don’t have recent stats. We adopted seven years ago. At that time, international & domestic adoption supplies were much higher & costs lower among non-Caucasian children. 

Here is link for stats, but they are from ‘94 http://statistics.adoption.com/information/interracial-adoption-statistics.html

This is bit more recent but not very accurate. This author goes on to state that gathering or finding stats is pretty difficult.

http://www.amfor.net/statistics.html#ADOPTERS 

190,000 children were adopted from foster care in 1999

���� -U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, AFCARS Report

50,000 children were adopted from public foster care in 2001;

50% were male;

50% were female;

38% were White;

35% were Black;

16% were Hispanic

���� -U.S. Department of Health & Human Services, AFCARS Report 

Excellent idea- a la carte government spending. But then we wouldn’t need govt since their job is to speak for those whom elected them.  I do like the a la carte idea, but it is logistically a nightmare. At what point would it be limited? Which things would be selectable?  

We, as a society, reap the benefits of all of these things so it wouldn’t be "fair". 

And while adoption is an excellent possibility for a healthy, Causcasian baby, there are women/girls who can get their head around giving their full term baby up-even if they know the road will be near impossible. . A mass of cells not so hard. 

It’s not our decision. The biggest ethical dilemma is where to draw the line. Some babies are viable as early as the end of the second trimester.  My sister had 27 week old twins prematurely. No ventilators (just a warming incubators & some caffeine for 6 weeks)  and at almost 2 they are developmentally in the middle of the chart with no physical or mental disabilities. 

Perhaps we would also have many more crack babies, serial killers & dregs of society.  OR maybe, if you subscribe to any organized religion, the son of God would’ve come already. Really, yours is a lame argument based on brownie elves, pegasus & unicorns in the land of Eutopia.

Thanks for the laugh!