I’m speechless Amy.

No, your version of Mayberry is not one that I aspire to live in….far from it.  I may be naive, but I honestly never think of not being accepted in a small town because of my race. I tend to believe there are more people in America who aren’t racist than are. We may differ on religious beliefs, politics or morals, but that doesn’t mean I would be disliked because of my race. so I always assumed the one problem I would have in making my way to small town living would be, being accepted for who I am as a big city gal. Would my outspoken nature clash with their slow way of dealing with things.

Because it is a small town, are their ideas about women, work, morals and values antiquated? And if they are, how could I handle being around that? Some reading your post about a doctor calling other physicians to what I would call "bad mouth you" may think you sound paranoid. However for reasons I can’t go into because of where I work, I can attest to the fact this type of thing does indeed happen among professionals. It’s ridiculous and petty, but it happens everyday all over the country. 

I really have taken this subject seriously and actually have done my homework in trying to find a small town to move to.I’m torn because I really want to land a job in D.C. But in 10 years I want to be retired in a small quiet place off the beaten path. It will be interesting to see where I ultimately end up.

Amy, it sounds as if you have had many obstacles and trials and tribulations in your life. And it’s heartbreaking to hear you are still going through them (through no fault of your own) but you also sound optimistic about life and what lies ahead for you. Kudos to you Dear Friend, all will work out best in the end. What doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger.

P.S. Your artwork is beautiful. You have a true gift.

I always wished I had come from a small town in the way that you explain Mary (sans the no Black people for obvious reasons :-)

In my mind they always seem so quaint, laid back and slow.  One of my favorite old shows is Andy Griffith’s Mayberry RFD. The town fictitious as it may be, has a charm about it that fits my personality. I am always talking about retiring in some off the beaten path small town where people can sit on the porch at night and drink lemonade, not worry about locking their doors and hang clothes out to dry on a warm Summer’s day.

Problem is I think a place like that only exist in my mind. Something tells me I would be hard pressed to find that type of community anymore in this day and age.

Letter #2, great letter. So many women I am sure can relate to how you feel. I can’t agree with Margo more, the answer is definitely to take a break from one another and allow your daughter to deal with whatever the issue is. If she will.

We see this in all types of relationships, that being that no matter what you say to someone they become defensive. And the answer is always that it is something bigger than is being presented.  Letter writer 2 needs to be emotionally prepared for hearing the root cause of her daughter’s animosity. Something tells me based on her letter it must be something deep-seated.

You were experiencing hypothermia and Your Mother chose to give you liquor over rushing you to the emergency? Yep, Laurel I stand corrected. You have a mother that made wonderful choices for you when you were a child. Forget everything that I have said, your mom did a great job raising you.

BTW, I never talk "smack" - I’m far to mature for that. I believed we were engaging in an exchange of opinions. You must have confused me with some young woman who is your contemporary.

Unbelievable. How sad.

You start your post off by saying you grew up with boundaries and structure but then contradict yourself by saying "but my mom also knew I was curious." What….she didn’t have the internal strength to tell her child no?

Laurel name one child who isn’t curious about adults and alcohol, drugs, cigarettes or sex. Children ARE curious about all of these things. And yet you admit to drinking wine, beer, brandy and gin & tonics as a child as if its not a big deal. Oh my Lord, you speak of children drinking "a little alcohol" as a learning experience. Something needed so that they learn how to drink in moderation once they are of age.

Bare with me on this, clearly you and I were brought up in different homes but….my father told his children "in our house you do as I say, and I do not want my children drinking before the age of 18." Not once did I go to my father and say, "let me have a sip of beer because I’m curious about how it tastes"  I had respect for my father, his guidance and the fact that he told us what was expected of us, so we listened.  Thank God I didn’t have parents like yours that would have gave in to my insistence to try alcohol, that is just disgusting! Trust me, I know how you were raised in this regard is not an anomaly, I am sure MANY people on this site have their own childhood memories of their parents allowing them to drink alcohol and break the law in the process.

As for your comment about me supposedly playing God, let me educate you on something (since as you said, you thought he was the only one allowed to judge) people judge others every single day, always have and always will. Given the fact you have judged me, your comment is quite hypocritical wouldn’t you say?

Hands down - bar-none I agree with you Joan for picking John John!  That is a memory I will forever have of the cutest little boy ever!

That clip brings a smile to my face everytime.

Boy, between the question of the day and this short stroll down memory lane by way of Sesame Street, Wow is really making my day. ;0)

I have no idea what you are talking about, because I support Planned Parenthood financially, and believe 100% in educating teens about safe sex. When I was a teen my father taught me "our" family moral code of conduct which was to abstain from sex until we were of legal age. I respected my father and didn’t have sex. I kissed and fondled, but I never went beyond what my father had instructed his kids to engage in. It wasn’t difficult for me, nor any of the girls I hung out with. None of us ended up pregnant or with STD’s. We went to school, socialized afterward and on the weekends and enjoyed being young. To be blunt,

I believe it is the teens who ARE well educated about sex that don’t engage in it as teens. In my opinion it is the ones raised in permissive households, unfortunately those abused and those who believe they are 25 year olds stuck inside a 15 year old body - that engage in sex.

I’m baffled by the fact that so many teens and young people can’t live like that. Either their parents aren’t instilling family values and morals OR they simply lack respect for what their parents have to say and have decided to act on their hormonal impulses.  

I believe 100% if marijuana was legalized we would indeed "see" more people under the influence and "high" because they won’t have to hide behind closed doors any longer. They will openly get high and become what I call slack jaw. That does disturb me. Just as when prohibition was abolished, people took to the streets with liquor and as you can see almost every neighborhood corner in America has a bar or tavern. Some people drink responsibly and some don’t - they abuse it. The same will happen with marijuana. But the question I have and will forever have on this issue is Why - why do people want to get high?

You and no one else from this site can convince me that a person who knowingly sets out to get high, isn’t doing it to fill a void of some type. It’s escapism plain and simple, but done in what I define as a wreckless manner. Please allow me my opinion on this matter and accept we do not agree.

This Question of the Day has made me so happy!

I understand that things are different by region in terms of things like newspaper delivery, milk & eggs, etc. etc.  But I am from Wisconsin and this has been my home for 49 years. In my area, almost every home had a milk chute (as we called them) built right into the side of your home.

(Oh my Lord this gives me such a warm feeling to think about)

It’s a cool, crisp autumn Saturday morning. And as a kid I remember bounding out of bed and rushing downstairs for breakfast - cereal of course. (My dad raised 11 children by himself - hot breakfast was strictly for holidays)  Always excited about what I could send my box tops in for - praying it wasn’t something like spy glasses. And then…..opening up the milk chute to find bottles of icy cold milk and if it was in the budget, my father would order chocolate milk! We’re talking chocolate milk that far surpasses anything offered today. Rich, thick and sweet!

Thanks Wow for allowing me to reminisce for a second.  Here’s a link to the old dairy trucks that use to home deliver milk each day in my community. Enjoy.

What a wonderful article Michele, kudos to you.

And more importantly kudos for being honest and true to yourself and allowing love to enter your life again.  I made a huge faux pas’ a few months ago in a discussion with an acquaintance on the subject of loving again after a spouse’s death. In my usual "finding the deep meaning in subjects" way, I equated the loss of her husband with the loss I have felt from past relationships that ended. Explaining that the grief she feels is somewhat the same as the pain I felt when my relationships came to an end.

To her credit she spoke up and (rightly so) corrected me. They are like water and oil. To have someone you love die, is a far more hurtful and mournful experience. He is no longer there for you to talk to, hold hands with, make love to or simply be with - even if you could. He is gone. And you as the surviving spouse are left with only memories. So to all the other women who have lost a spouse, friend and confidante all rolled up in one, my heart goes out to you. Those who are like me can intellectualize what your are experiencing, but we will never truly understand the depths of despair you may have.

Well as you can see, you have a bevy of supporters on this thread who agree with you 100%. They skipped over what I knew you to mean was a simple and knee-jerk reaction (I was merely responding out of shock because this was not the norm from what I have read from you) however as you can see others have now pulled you to "their side" Now your opinion of her being featured now means you understand that she and her husband her the Devil incarnate! Responsible for all the ills of our nation and with this Glamour cover, just another example of the fact they just don’t get it. ;-)

And here you are thinking you were simply voicing an opinion. Naive Mr. Wow….what were you thinking?

You know what RJB, there have been many, many topics that you and I have disagreed about over the months on WoW, but this post….this post and your statements disgust me beyond words. I have no respect for you nor your beliefs.  For you to post that you "don’t consider it too awful for a teen to have sex as having sex is part of learning to be an adult.  I also don’t see a problem if they drink with supervision occasionally, because I think it’s good for them to learn that alcoholic beverages can be consumed in a responsible manner, like a glass of wine with dinner.  The children raised by straight-laced parents are the ones that often go crazy with booze once they leave home."

Sex indeed is a part of BEING an adult, but children should not have to experience sex. Children do masturbate, children do kiss, but children DO NOT have to engage in sex. Sex should be something adults engage in.  And children SHOULD NOT drink alcohol with or without supervision because IT IS AGAINST THE LAW for children to consume alcoholic beverages. So to argue that it is fine for them to break the law as long as an adult is there to witness it, is ridiculous.

So you just continue to get drunk because it makes you "less shy" and you hang onto you belief and desire for chemical fun. And if it sounds like I’m judging you…. I am.

P.S. I am one of those people who was raised by a straight laced parent and I am far from being an alcoholic, have never done drugs and have no desire to, didn’t engage in underage sex.  And none of this hindered my growth as a woman, adult or sexual being. Who I am today is a woman that is for the most part respected, happy, content and successful. Living proof that you can grow up in a home filled with structure and boundaries and STILL mature into a fully functioning adult that doesn’t have to "get high" to get through a day!