IMHO—-who the heck runs for ANY political position if your 16/17 year old daughter is pregnant and the family is going through a crisis (and it is a crisis) about that? That’s when the parents (whether male or female says, thank you but no thank you, we’ve got issues here to deal with. Call me later. Like in two years.

 And then, what kind of parent turns this situation into putting the pregnant teenager in the limelight? Personally, to me, it’s throwing your kids under the bus yourself. To then pull the boy into it and later push him out—-oh, my—-I feel for those kids. 

DeBurca,

   Agree with you. Interesting that we were given information prior to 9/11 by the French and ignored it. What do they know? 

Only given to us by one of the top terrorism experts in the world—but you know, they are French, ignore them (as we did.)

When 9/11 occurred, I wasn’t the slightest bit suprised. Saddened, but not surprised. I wondered why it happened on that grand of a scale much earlier. Heck, Clancy even wrote a fictional plot about it before the event ever happened.

IMHO, the arrogance of Bush et al fomented only more rage and anger at the U.S. that we will likely see grow in years to come. 

The whole torture thing was like a non-stop "24" to me. Not the way real psychology works. It’s been shown that information gained under torture isn’t reliable. Plus, we are to abide by the Geneva Convention—-uh, I thought. Why should we hold others to this if we don’t hold ourselves? We’re an exception somehow? And this helps us in the world, how?

Love Goddess:

Thought these two sites might be of interest to you:

 http://www.boston.com/yourlife/relationships/articles/2007/02/13/hooking_up_is_the_rage_but_is_it_healthy/?page=2

This one is from a PBS production and is excellent:

 http://www.pbs.org/wnet/religionandethics/episodes/may-8-2009/hooking-up/2896/

I agree with Frannie—Elizabeth is very ill, has young children—why in the world would she chose a divorce at this point? She might choose her own room in her house, whatever, but to put everyone through a divorce, her own self in a precarious situation (most possibly) regarding health insurance—why would she do that? 

I don’t like the fact that she knew about what John was up to and went along with the campaign (that’s a set-up if ever there was one, seems like) and she probably kicks herself in retrospect.

Her book seems a way to vent and tell of her own feelings. It’s her business to do so if she chooses. Those who want to read it can, those who don’t, don’t have to buy it.

In her situation though, who in the world would say, kick him out and go your own way? In reality, she needs him—if only to take out the garbage, bring in the money, pay for her health insurance and raise the kids. That’s something and it seems it’s getting overlooked. He shouldn’t get off so easily as to get "kicked to the curb." There are major responsibilities at his home right now. 

Kris,

   From what I know, the situation with younger girls (high school and college age in the hook-up/alcohol dominant culture) is very different than you describe above. You have a relationship with a particular male friend—you know him and the two of you choose to have sex together but my guess is that you’re clearly aware of what you’re doing, that you enjoy it and that you remember it. This is what differentiates your type of relationship and the hook-up culture (where all too often females don’t even recall whom they were with or what happened.) They put themselves in precarious situations which is vastly different from what it seems you describe above. Best to you! 

Kermie,

     No, not one night stands…unless that includes not even knowing who the one night stand was with. It’s that bad in many many cases. Alcohol fuels this, from what I’ve seen. The mix of the two are disastrous. A girl who thinks she can outdrink a boy or keep up with him drink for drink is setting herself up. That’s NOT liberation, it’s foolishness. Check out hook-ing up online and check out various schools—our major universities. You’ll see lots of articles.  Check out the student newspapers…Dartmouth, etc. Look at The Duke Chronicle—Last Day of Classes 2009. The administrations aren’t doing their jobs remotely either.

Belinda,

   Yes, it’s true. Very very little (if any) dating or romance. It’s drunken screwing as if intimacy is the most frightening thing on earth.  NOT casual sex as we might remember it—at least we did remember it. In too many cases now, the girls have no idea if they gave consent or were raped. Often when they are aware of "whom" they did it with (if the boy is not "cool") they are mortified and will call "rape." Which is awful for women who are truly raped—clearly raped. To think feminism is whatever the worst of the boys do is to miss the point altogether. Pass on to all young girls you know.

Also, the boys don’t have to do a thing (as in asking a girl out)—the girls tend to get desperate and throw themselves on the boys anyway, servicing them (often in bars) and getting nothing (the girls) for themselves even. Yes, we’ve failed them somehow in terms of any understanding of healthy feminism which does include strong self-esteem and critical thinking.

Not all students are into this scene, but it dominates. Those who aren’t into it either fall into the "college marriage" (past going steady too but not literally getting married but not dating anyone else—ever)…there IS no dating. Hardly any dances even.

And the dancing—most often, grinding…not dancing. It’s sad, really. Educate the girls. And no, not to be prudes, not the point (or not my point.)

One girl I know at one major university just starting asking guys out (on dates) and didn’t get drunk and screw them either…typical dates. She never got turned down for a date. A girl like that is bold. Yes, it would be nice if the boys would ask girls out too, but if not, this girl took the present situation and turned it into a major smart move for herself. 

Chrome Toe,

     I agree completely with you and with love goddess. I’ve seen the same with children in late teens and twenties who have been disgusted by this culture. They’d hoped for something different (and it was different at their high school)—not so in college. None of them I’ve seen. Some are worse than others, sure. The mix of hooking up and alcohol (usually the two go in combination) aren’t doing anyone any favors. Seems most rarely even remember the sex they have. It’s something to "get over with and quickly" and somehow this is seen by many females as "feminism." No. Not so. It’s as if "we are liberated enough now to objectify ourselves." They missed the whole meaning. Very sad. Play right into the boys’ games—not grounding for these females in femaleness—only "maleness" which yes, still dominates. But as long as young females don’t get this they will fall into the trap. Yes, still using their bodies (calling it liberation) but hoping to be "loved." More consciousness raising is needed. Spread the word. It’s not about prudishness but about caring for oneself. 

What I’m talking about is very different. Google "hook-up culture" and Dartmouth, and Princeton, and Duke, and Yale, and Georgetown. I don’t want to argue about this anymore. I know what I’ve researched, seen and students who have testified about issues. Maybe OSU is different—I have no idea. I know the hook-up culture is dominant in most every college I know of. Maybe you know many more than I do. Most will say the hook-up culture, combined with alcohol abuse, combined with zero consequences in not a good mix. Nor are the assaults, rapes, grey sex, that goes along with this. It’s very borderline behavior. And very few if any consequences—that’s the difference. It’s enabled now—at least at the very many (many many more than I named above) at these universities. My son and friends didn’t get involved in this dominant campus culture but they hated it and it got in their way constantly. And wasn’t even safe. Not prudish kids either. Smart, good-looking, with level-heads—-they just got sick of out-of control students who were openly destructive and the admin did nothing. I’m saying no more about this. There’s plenty of info out there about this situation if you want to further check it out.