I have observed from around the world:

(1) Abusers have a knack for identifying a vulnerability and using it to control the other person. Something like setting up situations to hurt another innocent person the abused does not want hurt, revealing something humiliating, threatening an insecure livelihood, or whatever it might be.

(2) Abusers, because they are so intrinsically dishonest, are often gifted at presenting not only a face of normalcy to the world, but often a face exactly opposite to what the abused experiences in private. They have a knack for couching things in terms difficult for the abused to overcome, so the abused is often the one who comes out looking like the one who is off base. Abusers may have degrees, titles, or positions that represent the opposite of their private behavior. This confuses not only the world, but initially, the abused. They may use their stature as a bully pulpit to convince the abused that they are the ones who are wrong.

(3) Abusers may try to goad the abused into reacting to them in a way that makes the abused look bad to others, who are kept from knowing the actual situation and what has gone into it.

(4) Abusers may use the good qualities of the abused against them.

(5) Mothers often bring their sons up as abusers. A harsh fact, but I have seen it over and over. Many mothers seem to deep down equate dominance with male sexuality, and overtly or subtly encourage that behavior in their sons, taking pride in their "manly" sons and seeming to look for something in that relationship that they are missing or wanting in their own sex lives. I wish I  had not witnessed this so many times in such varied cultures and circumstances.

(6) Abused people are not slow learners. Their minds have been messed over something like brainwashing. The mental context of their world  has been altered, which is what the dominance is for. Fear is used to keep them from breaking out and finding out the truth. If there has been no background to give them contrasting information, this is not difficult to do. All reason is based on predicate. Change the predicate, and the conclusion changes, so erroneous thinking is not hard to accomplish.

(7) Someone to confide in and help is the main key, but also, for each abused person to learn to identify what they are "protecting" by not doing so, and what their options are.

Such a triumph of spirit. How to face adversity without being changed by it. In the US we are anxiously awaiting our chance to see her in person. I’ve heard she is amazingly charismatic. Thanks for nice article and all the comments, so we get a little taste of it. What a voice!