The biggest lie I have ever believed? Most of what others have said. My mother had me convinced of several lies simultaneously: She loved me no matter what. She had my best interests at heart. I would never amount to anything. I was a mean, nasty, ugly person. I believed that he was divorced, that he was faithful…. I believed that I preferred being coupled. I believed for the longest time that I’m mean and nasty and ugly. Then I started loving someone who tested my patience and faith and humor and logic and emotion… and I learned all sorts of good things about myself.

CBW, I’m 62, long-divorced and happily single. By now, it’s not worth the effort for me to have a romantic relationship. BTDT. I understand about writing a fictional perfect sweetheart. Six years ago I lucked into one who lives across the country, and whose correspondence gives me a lot more of what I need than of what I want. For me, it’s mental stimulation and emotional generosity I need to give and receive. Give yourself as much time as it takes to figure out and refine what you actually do want and need. It’s hard to get other people’s expectations out of your way.

I’ve been astonished and crushed by some of the people who’ve made my overweight the dealbreaker. I just had no idea. Internet friendships come into being without regard to appearance, and some fade away because of appearance. Before this, it never occurred to me that I - or anyone - could be dropped from a mutually rewarding friendship because of looks. I’ve had this experience with males and females, older and younger, platonic and romantic. I was lucky that my innocence lasted until this century.

As I age, I become more financially conservative. I’ve always been a tightwad, and now my investing is oriented to hanging on to money too. In my sixties, I have about 30% in stocks, 60% in short and long term bonds, and most of the rest in money markets. That doesn’t include the value of my paid-off house, because that value changes so drastically day by day.

Should Silda Spitzer stand by her man? For me, there are more important things to think about here than that. First is that this women’s site posed a pointless gossip question as a ratings draw - and it worked. Think about that in terms of what we can expect here. Then - why is Eliot Spitzer’s doing what most men do a bigger deal than anyone else doing it? I’ve always wondered why the women stuck around, and I guess like Hillary, they had their reasons. A few commenters here mentioned that this whole affair, may have had political motivation. Yes… and whose? My father (in NYS at the time) did prison time so that a political candidate could score the “cleaning up governmnet” points. I can think of a couple of ways Hillary might come out ahead here. Silda… I don’t know what private arrangement they have, or might make. Did they say “forsaking all others” when they got married?

A few posters have mentioned your “target demographic”. I haven’t seen it specified anywhere, and by now I’m curious. Famous white women in their fifties? Sorry… I want to like this site, and I do, and I’m still suspicious. Feels like something’s happening that’s not out on the table. I’m in my sixties, looking for the online company of older, intelligent liberal women, and lots of exposure to women’s thoughtful opinions on personal and social issues. I could do without the fashion commentary here - there are more sites that do that than do good discussion.

Women I wish could run for President: Molly Ivins, Eleanor Roosevelt, Lady Diana. Right, I can’t think of anyone alive now. If Hillary wins, that will be good for breaking the glass ceiling. But I still call her Hillary: “Clinton” means Bill to me.