"I was really lucky. With my metabolism, I was not lucky, but with my family I was triply lucky, and it more than made up for it."

Frank you are so lucky to have been born into that family - and they to have you.  Your book is on my list.  It would be surreal but delicious to have Eric Ripert approach my table and later wringing his hands in anticipation of my review of his food. 

Cent’anni!

L#1

Dear Southern D,

I agree with Margo – your father and younger brother are truly graced with the universal love which is the true essence of Christianity as well as other religions. Are you as expansive as your father and younger brother? What I am about to suggest may not go down easily but I feel that it is surest path to expanding your older brother’s understanding of the principle of Universal Love and healing the pain you feel. Find a way to forgive your brother and make it so that your husband can easily do the same (stop badmouthing your brother to him). If there is family gossip going back and forth – put an end to it and put everyone on notice that you are content, that you’ve forgiven your brother, that you love him and are not going to speak badly about him. Keep reaching out to your brother (even if it this remains a one-way venture) – when you hear any news about him/his family send a little note to let him/them know how happy his good news makes you (send encouraging notes for bad news); send him updates on what is going on with you (good and bad) before you tell anyone else so that he’s hearing directly from you and not secondhand; send him birthday/holiday cards – just keep the connection alive and loving. Find ways to make it easy and irresistible for the family as a whole to go on with family events and celebrations. Personally I wouldn’t alternate get-togethers with your brother – I’d go to every single one. This is an opportunity for you to transform and expand onto a higher plane and by doing so draw others to follow you on that path. Even if your brother never grows beyond his ignorance and fear you can be sure that others will. Make a path.

L#2

Dear Pink,

I agree with Margo 100%. Be grateful for your mom and cut her some slack as she learns to get with the program. Use positivity to gently guide her to a more complete understanding of your experience. Please realize that this is just as much a period of transformation for your parents as it is for you.

L1

Dear Martyr - Margo is right. 

You need to infuse your home with harmony and light for your children.  If you can not create this with your wife then you can to do this without her.  Give your children the lesson of your love, give your wife the potential for rebirth, and give yourselfthe space to truly see who you are and who you can be.

E

Hello Joni.  It looks a lot sleeker … uh, almost anorexic. 

Navigation is not streamlined.  Why isn’t there a menu with submenues?  For example how do I get to today’s Peggy Rometo’s last article from this page without having to resort to search pilates? 

Just a thought. It does look nice though.

Wishing you much love, happiness and grace - E.

Nancy - so true.  Did yours give big bear hugs?  Mine did!

She’s reborn through you too.  Maybe there should be a national Aunt Frieda day - bringing us all back to center in the spirit of all-embracing love for each other, hearth and home.  

Phyllis - thanks for so generous.  You brought extra happiness to me and I’ll be sure to spread it around.

lol I had to look up Klops -  they sound so good!  My Aunt Freida/Frieda was a wonderful cook and showed her love through her cooking.  I only had her marrow dumplings once, back in the late 70’s, but I can still taste and smell them as they slide deliciously across my tongue as if it were just an hour ago.  They could sustain me for the rest of my life.

Mr.wOw,

I’m with you on this one.  I never agreed with Ms. Prejean’s opinion but I’ll defend her right as a US citizen to voice that foolishness.  She was a nothing until Perez dropped that napalm on her and boy is that nuisance thriving on the napalm!

Keith Olbermann’s show and all the other opinion shows dished up as journalism are reminiscent of the trash tv Morton Downey Jr. Show.  I was relieved when that obnoxious show came to an end.  Who knew it had been breeding colonies of much more far-reaching and deeply entrenched parasites?

Sheila - I myself am all too logical … but*

any of the astronomers at the Hayden Planetarium will tell you that the current estimate of galaxies in the universe observable from earth is 40 to 100 *billion*.  40 to 100 billion galaxies each containing billions of stars!  If heaven were "limited" to existing just up there the possibilities are still boundless.  However, the spiritual side of me triumphs over my logical Mr. Spock sensibilities and I say that for me heaven does exist though it is not limited by space or time or observation, it has not been depicted or defined through art, science or religious dogma, and, though we may not actively remember how to access it we all have and will again.  Is my Aunt Frieda sitting on a cloud strumming a harp?  Not likely.  Can I access her and other departed loved ones?  Yes, through meditation sometimes I really do.  Not in a tactile way but in a spiritual sense - yes.  And it is heavenly.  Have you ever had any supernatural experience?  Surely you have though you may have reasoned it away to better wrap your logic around it.  I believe we get glimpses of heaven as we go through life getting our teeth kicked in.  In between rare moments, in our individual space as well as shared space, in our dreams, and through our death we have heaven and it has us. 

Wishing you and all much light, love and peace - E

L#2

Dear Explorer - no job, not enrolled (right now) in college though you describe yourself as a college student, likely bored and spending a lot of time online to thinking about and talking to strangers about sex.  My best advice is to take a break from the online forums, sign-up for the spring semester and get a job, any job ASAP.  Save your money and seek out adventures closer to home where your parents can save you from yourself if it gets out of hand.  

L#1

Dear Sandy - your ex is smiling like the cat that ate the canary.  Stop being his little canary!  You’ve handed over your power to your ex and his miserable mother.  Reclaim your power, reclaim your position and reclaim your rightful place in your daughter’s life.  Do not let your ex’s mom " take over during all the get-togethers" - elbow her out of your way.  It isn’t easy facing up to your fears so if you have to take it slow do it brick by brick - but do it.  When he smiles that sick smile at you stare him down (look at his forehead if you must avoid his eyes) and make him look away first - if you can manage it smile back at him as if you know some secret that will soon defeat him.  You can defeat him.  Stop quivering in the shadows of your life - take the reigns and you will grow stronger with every party and eventually regret that you let them clip your wings for so long after the divorce. 

Wishing you much strength,  E.

To Dani Smith - you have your point of view.  You have your right to express it.  Before you express a criticism of anyone again you may just want to consider whether or not there is a "justification" for going for the jugular through your commentary and name-calling.  Your use of the phrase "two wrongs don’t make a right" is ironic.  

To Liz Smith - (ha! any relation?!) Good review.  I saw "Inglourius Basterds" last night.  I predict that it will go down in history as a masterpiece.  It is a genius depiction of the sadistic glorification of brutality and racism on every side.  The point is that there is no justification for the horrors we commit against each other in the name of "righteous" war and revenge though we hungrily swallow the propoganda whole, cheer on the slaughter and are all diminished by it.  There are Frederick Zoller’s, Hans Landa’s and Shoshanna’s on all sides.  

Mel - I agree with you that the soldier must have been under tremendous stress.

As to why my last five posts were inexplicably deleted only that admin person can explain because it makes no sense to me.  S/he emailed this explanation:

"Hi E. - 
The comment (and your additional comment on it) was off-topic, nothing
more so please don't take that personally.  The article of the soldier's
deaths isn't about Haliburton stock price or Cheney which appears to be
what you were talking about."

EKA My money is on Adam Lambert - he’s a showstopper!  I’ve never tuned into American Idol on a weekly basis but I look forward to hearing and seeing him perform.  I haven’t seen anyone with such unflinching natural joy, unapologetic power and commanding presence since Freddie Mercury.