Lena B

My Comments (706 so far…)

Dining room table? Fur coat? A new house? What was your first 'adult' purchase?

You’re so kind Patty! Sisterly compassion is so heartwarming.

Dining room table? Fur coat? A new house? What was your first 'adult' purchase?

You have given me a gracious compliment Lauriate; thank you! I wasn’t trying to be provocative. I’ve talked about my interactions with young women who are victims of abuse as part of my work. I may have vaguely alluded to my own story of abuse. This question was a good opening to share I guess. Unfortunately, many women can relate to some form of abuse. I’m so thankful that I managed to survive that period and reclaim my life.

Dining room table? Fur coat? A new house? What was your first 'adult' purchase?

Thank you for the compliment Chips! I wish I could have said a car (like everyone else), but my first vehicle was given to me a family member.

Dining room table? Fur coat? A new house? What was your first 'adult' purchase?

It’s a complicated story that I appreciate you wanting to know Lauriate. I married at 19 to a man who went from being verbally to physically abusive. To make a long story short, I separated from him (at 24) and he began to stalk me. I bought the gun for my protection after talking it over with my family and getting properly permitted. The divorce was final over a year later after we separated, but I never felt safe during that time. Also during that time, I began training to become a law enforcement officer; I’m still with the force now 20 years later. That purchase of the weapon was a somber one for me, I never wanted to have to use it and thank God I didn’t. As far as the purchase itself, I was really lucky to find a firearm of that caliber at a pawn shop. I didn’t think about running a trace on it until I was about two years into service with my agency. Fortunately it came back clean.

Dining room table? Fur coat? A new house? What was your first 'adult' purchase?

My first (real) adult purchase was a Glock 17 automatic firearm. I bought it at a pawn shop for $210. I was 24 years old.

Caption This!

Preparing for rain on the Bullet Train.

Dancing With the Dead: Mr. wOw Is Not Rushing to Michael's Last Moonwalk

For months we have been asking in our house *Is Michael Jackson still dead?*

That’s interesting Katherine because when I was a kid, we asked the same thing about Elvis.

Dancing With the Dead: Mr. wOw Is Not Rushing to Michael's Last Moonwalk

I’m not running out to get a ticket either Mr. wOw. But the music in theatre surround sound should be fantastic—dancin’ in the seats good!

Caption This!

Happy Hall O’Ween!!

With whom – if anyone – do you share the details of your sex life?

No one. I keep those thoughts to myself.

Should marijuana or prostitution be legalized?

Legalize both because it doesn’t matter in terms of the demand. You will not change mindsets of those who use either product. If you create a bureaucratic process to access both products in a safe environment with strict regulation, it still won’t matter. When vices are placed under government control it creates a black market—a lucrative black market. So there’s nothing to lose or gain either way. In my opinion marijuana is no more of a gateway drug than alcohol, Oxycontin, Vicodin and most benzodiazepines. And prostitution? Someone will always be willing to pay to play— no commitment and no relationship.

Have you ever lost your child, even for a moment?

When my oldest daughter (now 20) was 4, she hid in between the clothing rack at a department store. She had never done that before and when I called for her and she didn’t answer, I thought my heart would stop. When I said her name the last time, loud and panicked enough to turn heads in the store, she surfaced. Needless to say she never did that again. We had a long talk about "stranger danger" and staying next to mommy when out in public.

My younger two children have never had a incident when they were lost from us. My youngest is now 4 and we have already had "the talk".

If you had to choose a theme song for your life, which would it be?

"Optimistic" by Sounds of Blackness. It was the song that kept me from falling.

"Don’t give up and don’t give in
Although it seems you never win
You will always pass the test
As long as you keep your head to the sky
You can win. As long as you keep your head to the sky

Be optimistic."

The Love Goddess: Are We Too Far Gone for Monogamy?

It is difficult for those with arrested development to control their impulses. I’ve seen 15 and 51 year old people struggle to maintain control over sexual urges. The 15 year old is a child in the process of self discovery and the 51 year old may not believe in monogamy. We expect a mature person to demonstrate the poetry of monogamy. But I agree that monogamy is and has always been a choice. No marriage certificate will change a person’s thought process. But give young people some credit Goddess, they know what fidelity is in spite of their limited life experience. Our young adults may not have many role models who demonstrate a committed relationship, but they still believe that sexual fidelity is attainable and not necessarily restrictive.

The Truth About Marriage, by Carin Rubenstein

Yes I feel pretty cool with it now partly due to our role reversal. I have a great husband who since losing his job last year is (slowly) evolving into a 21st Century Man. Not quite a house-husband, he will cook and clean on his schedule. I’m not critical and if I want something done sooner than later, I do it and he’s not offended. I must admit it’s a strange arrangement lol! But I found that the key is to refrain from my natural tendency to nag. When I ask him to do a specific task, I ask, not order. If he bristles, then I use my excellent negociation skills.

I’ll admit that I believe that I do more in terms of the work, home, relationship balance. But I won’t complain because I have a committed partner. I’m thankful that don’t have to carry the entire weight myself.